Im going to put it out there - I have the upmost sympathy for Prince Harry.

William's words of wisdom were reported in the Sussex book,'Finding Freedom'. Their mother also advised both of them to really get to know the girl they married as she, ruefully told Prince William that she hardly knew P.C before they married. Again, in the book.

It’s quite ironical to say no one knows what goes on behind closed doors and then follow that with definitive knowledge of Charles upbringing based on ‘reports’. ?

M0nica

Walking away from a life he cannot deal with has most people's support.

Turning on those who tried to help him, no matter how inept they were in doing it fills me with nothing but contempt.

This is exactly the point.

I have sympathy (not pity) with his difficulties.
But loathe his way of dealing with them.

He is defending himself against media slurs and the sort of content that is present on this thread - when none of us know what goes on behind closed doors.

Maybe he is right about the upbringing of his father -it certainly appears that Charles suffered - most reports say that he was a sensitive child who struggled with his harsh schooling. I would imagine that most people brought up as the royals appear to have bene would have suffered.

I just feel it is wrong to criticise (and endorse the media vendetta) when no-one really knows what went on.

But what is he defending himself over? He wanted to leave the duties of the RF behind and no one criticised him for that. He was criticised for wanting 'to have his cake and eat it'.

His entire family has remained dignified and quiet despite the awful allegations made during that joke of an 'interview' with Oprah, the most outrageous which were proved to be false.

Even the so called 'headlines' in newspapers and magazines had been manufactured/taken out of context to try and give their claims some validity.

A TV host and friend of M's, for weeks after that 'interview' was putting out 'information' about contact between H and his father and brother, fuelling the flames of the fire they'd lit.

Her only source was M; how else would she have known about the telephone conversations that had taken place?

To lose your AC due to estrangement is heart breaking. To have false accusations given as the reason(s) is soul destroying. To have it played out on the world stage is cruel and spiteful.

Defend himself against what ? Is criticising his grandparents
upbringing of their children a defence ?

Me too.
Then people get all cross about the things they've heard or imagined to have happened.

He has the right to defend himself.

I am amazed at all the detailed knowledge here of things that have gone on behind closed doors!

M0nica

Walking away from a life he cannot deal with has most people's support.

Turning on those who tried to help him, no matter how inept they were in doing it fills me with nothing but contempt.

Monica, you often post exactly what I feel and this post is no exception. Thank you.

Who was there that witnessed the temper tantrum?

Spot on Josieann, I think this describes Prince Harry perfectly and the family's particularly the Queens efforts to placate him over the years. Making exceptions for him when engaged and overlooking protocol in order to please him and later his wife. When Prince William expressed brotherly concerns about the speed of the relationship, he was greeted with a temper tantrum worthy of a three year old . The Queen finally had to say NO to him over certain matters when they left the RF and has reaped the venom from her Grandson ever since. Always difficult and entitled, now just horrible.

Maybe Harry was spoilt and pampered and given into by his family because they actually sensed a very headstrong bolshy character there? You know how it is (or perhaps you don't) when you have a child who goes off the rails or rebels. You try to make excuses for them, or over indulge them or give into their demands just to keep the lines of communication open. The trouble is when that child decides to break away they often want the same favours accorded to them as a truculent adult.

Luckgirl the very opposite to his family have shown him little compassion, he was spoilt and pampered

I agree Jaberwok.

Smileless2012

"He may or may not be damaged but he's certainly vindictive" yes he is isn't he merlotgran.

I agree with merlotgran and smileless. I think he’s a nasty piece of work and as Josieann says, he’s not doing himself any favours.

One of my son’s friends at school lost his mother at the age of fifteen. She committed suicide using alcohol and tablets. She went to a public toilet to do it so that her three young sons wouldn’t be the ones to find her. Those young men are successful members of society. They are not trying to make millions from the sale of a book detailing their life and their mother’s death.

Harry doesn’t know what normal life is like. It’s unfortunate that he found Meghan as someone a bit more grounded may have helped him deal with his life more successfully, without the constant need to be in the limelight and the constant need to regurgitate the death of his mother.

Well we've all got our own opinions and that's fine, but to say his family showed him no compassion over the years is clearly ridiculous . Harry had the best of everything,no one ever said NO to him,his grandmother, father and brother loved him, his mother worried about him as he could be a bit wild. I think the RF did their very best by both those young boys, and they certainly did their very best to welcome and help Meghan, forlornly as it turned out, only to have it all thrown back in their faces with bitterness, venom and lies. Now another book apparently this time the complete truth! The others obviously
weren't. Really horrible.

A flawed human being with a global platform can heap misery on those who may not deserve it.

And I disagree that Harry is painted as "evil". That's a huge exaggeration. But I do think, looking at his behaviour and what he has said, that he's unkind and spiteful.

I do not feel I need to blame Harry for wanting to take opportunities to set the record straight as he sees it.

But Luckygirl what about all the lies he and Meghan told to Oprah? All those things that were disproved afterwards? Do you call that "setting the record straight"?

As I said: Who could blame them for wanting to put their side of the story? - a negative side of the story is being peddled and latched on to all the time; it is reasonable that they might want to reply, whether in a book or on a TV show. I do not feel I need to blame Harry for wanting to take opportunities to set the record straight as he sees it.

If any one of us were being publicly vilified in our locality and we felt that this was unjustified, would we just lie back and let it multiply? - I think not.

Anniebach - he may feel that his family have shown him little compassion and understanding. When there is a family rift people do get hurt on both sides - that is sadly inevitable. How can we expect him to sit quietly when he too has been deeply hurt?

He has been brought up in a very distorted way, not just because of the death of his mother, but because he is part of a dysfunctional family that is totally unique - and clearly a burden to him. He has the right to choose to try and put it behind him.

William gets applauded for how he has dealt with all this, but his experiences as someone with a different personality and in a different position in the family are his own. Harry's are his own. We all have to find ways of making the best of the hand we are dealt.

I do not think Harry is perfect (nor William) but neither do I think he is the evil person that he is painted to be. He is simply a flawed human being, as we all are.

Our mum died when my youngest sister was 14 and my other sister 16. We had an absentee, feckless father. I was only 23 myself but tried to support my sisters.
Of course you can't compare the two. Obviously my sisters didn't have the full force of the media watching their every move and having pictures and stories of their mother thrust in their faces constantly.
However, my sisters, especially the youngest, were always known as 'the one whose mum died' and pointed at and whispered about at school.
It was awful for the princes but, as someone says upthread, the Royal Family had the money, and access to help for those boys should they choose to take advantage of it. We had to struggle on alone.

And writing books. The statement that one won't be published until after the Queen dies is chilling.

but they are able to settle their differences (or not) between themselves without news-hungry media people at their door.

And so could Harry instead of going on Oprah.

they should show a little compassion and understanding too

They cannot go away quietly - the media hounds them endlessly. They are not like any other family where there is a rift - they are under siege all the time. Who could blame them for wanting to put their side of the story?

I admire Harry for putting a distance between himself and his family. He made a choice that he did not want to be a part of it all, and he found a partner who understood his feelings and helped to facilitate his new future.

There are many families who have been touched by estrangement - we have a thread on Gransnet about it - but they are able to settle their differences (or not) between themselves without news-hungry media people at their door.

Just because they have money - Harry inherited his and Meghan earned hers - does not mean they are any different from the rest of us and they feel pain and sadness just as we do.

My view is that we should show a little compassion and understanding to these fellow human beings.