Wedding guest outfit

I'd like to give another vote for a John Lewis personal shopper as I did exactly that last week and came home with the ideal dress and coat. It was a really pleasant exercise and the shopper was endlessly patient. For what it is worth, I now have a lovely just-below-the-knee dress with 3/4 sleeves in a white, black and green print to wear with black tights and little black ankle boots, and a warm coat in an exactly matching green. I wouldn't have looked at these on the rail, but the shopper knew exactly what she was doing!

I like Roman Originals too. Read the reviews as sizes vary between items. Very reasonable in price and they do good shrugs that are more versatile than a jacket but smarter than an ordinary cardigan. They are very good on returns too if the size doesn't fit. Good luck.

I'd agree that JL is a good place to start as they have a lot of the more unusual labels - the 2 dresses already suggested are beautiful. The trouble with Phase Eight, Hobbs and the like is that they're a lot of peoples' "go to" for weddings and you're likely to see someone else in the same dress as you. A friend went to a small wedding of around 50 guests not long before the first lockdown. She was wearing a lovely Hobbs dress...and so were 2 others! She was mortified. Charity shops and New To You shops are also places where you can often pick up something exclusive.

I am your type of shape but a bit taller and heavier. I like Seasalt. Empire line is very flattering l find as it skims the waist and brushes past the hips. I like sweetheart necklines too.

I also like Roman and their returns policy is really good .But for mother of groom (I have 5 sons and 1 stepson ) I like John Charles.

Grandmagrewit - I totally agree with Coastalgran - how many wedding outfits are bought, worn once and then languish in a wardrobe?

We have been invited to a wedding in June. My DH hasn't worn a suit for years. He found one in a charity shop which was perfect. It was from M&S in a modern style and looked brand new. He later found a note in the pocket with directions to a wedding venue. Clearly, the same can go for some men when it goes for clothes languishing in a wardrobe.

I still haven't found anything for myself. Roman do seem to do this type of outfit. There are also a couple of independent dress shops near me that seem to do more dressy outfits. I have a couple of nice dresses that I have hardly worn so I am not stressing too much (yet !!) as we are only guests and won't be upfront and centre.

Have you thought of renting a dress/outfit? There’s lots of threads about similar situations in the Style section on Mumsnet and renting is always suggested as an answer. If you’re going to continue to try to lose the unwanted weight you’ve gained, it seems silly to buy something that won’t fit you in the future. Btw, I agree with others who’ve posted, size 12 is hardly “tubby”.

Personally I wouldn’t wear trousers. I‘ve been to two weddings where ladies wore trouser suits and they just didn’t look right. No suggestions as to where to find an outfit I’m afraid, sorry.

I totally agree with Coastalgran - how many wedding outfits are bought, worn once and then languish in a wardrobe? More than 300,000 tonnes of clothing (worth £12.5 bn) are sent to landfill every year in the UK so a wedding is a real chance to consider the environment and wear something "preloved". We have an excellent charity shop in a nearby town that specialises in bridal and wedding wear, and stocks all the "big names" at very reasonable prices. If you buy an outfit and donate it back afterwards, you've benefitted the charity twice!

I would give on-line "Light in the box"a look,i had a dress made to measure from them and it was wonderfull and very reasonable price wise.

Go to a very good charity shop or shop that does designer pre-worn and pay a fraction of the cost of new, get it altered if you need to to wear it, dry clean and pop it back. I have done this for years and saved a fortune for weddings (my son's included), university garden parties, graduations, cruises, dances etc. The compliments that I have had on outfits that cost me less than £20 have been great.

I’m a Phase 8 fan and also Hobbs, it’s all about the fabric for me. I was always anxious about local small independent shops not having the stock or feeling obliged to buy but I completely changed my mind after visiting a friend of my sister who has a dress shop in Ireland. I bought a mother of the bride outfit there and I felt like a duchess . I’m going again in May in preparation for niece’s wedding in September. She offers a postal service and supplies some very very well dressed ladies in the UK and Europe, she really knows her stock and how to flatter your figure. She’s Katriona in Banbridge . I’m not suggesting you go as far but if she’s that good then other independent traders will also be and importantly there’s precious little chance of meeting someone in the same outfit.

Secret squirrel I having the same problem we have a wedding in June and I'm panicking now I don't want to look like mutton dressed as lamb but I dont want to look like my granny its problem

‘Matching this, that & the other’!

I wore a trouser ‘suit’ to DD3’s wedding. A lovely silvery grey silky affair with a wrap around top with shawl collar - and what is more, I wore a small fascinator. Nothing wrong with that (NB Esmay!!). I was comfortable all day and would have been miserable in a traditional MoB type outfit with matching that and the other.
Secretsquirrel just do what is right for you. Feeling uncomfortable is the worst thing.

kangaroo73

I’ve got a similar dilemma but as mother of the bride. Everywhere I look it USA uniform look - shift dress, matching jacket, hat or fascinator. I really don’t like that look especially the need for a hat. I’m 75 and a bit plump. My daughter says wear what you like but ……

I'm in the same boat, but as MOTG, which is less onerous, but still.

I have booked an appointment with a John Lewis personal shopper, and am hoping she will be able to work miracles?.

The will find you an outfit and shoes and even fit a bra to suit the neckline of your chosen dress/top. I've used the service before, and it's painless. You can opt to go round the store with the PS to find the clothes, or just sit there enjoying being waited on. I've booked several weeks ahead of the wedding, as the appointments can fill up quickly.

Canadian Gran, that is a very pretty dress that you suggested. At a reasonable price point and lovely for smart lunches, afternoon teas or dinner parties afterwards. Well done.

PS .
A bit of padding in the bra dept is okay !

When is the wedding ?
Which colours suit you ?

You aren't fat - if you are a 12 !
But you are a petite .

I wouldn't wear a trousers suit .
And please stay away from fascinators .
Frankly I can't think of anything worse than a trouser suit plus fascinator .

Hats are better or go for big hair to balance your body .

Have an experiment with new styles even hair pieces before the day .

And try out your make up .

Big florals are too much if you are petite so think plain or tiny print .

If you buy a dress that's great and you love it - can you get it altered if it's too big ?

Try -
John Lewis
Phase Eight
Wallis
Boden - great though perhaps they are rather casual .

Maybe a plain dress and coat and treat yourself to some sensational jewellery !

Don't forget a bag and shoes and wear them in !

Stick your spare tights in your bag .

I once looked like Dick Emery doing an impression of a dame
hobbling along in uncomfortable shoes !

USA? ? think I meant usual

I’ve got a similar dilemma but as mother of the bride. Everywhere I look it USA uniform look - shift dress, matching jacket, hat or fascinator. I really don’t like that look especially the need for a hat. I’m 75 and a bit plump. My daughter says wear what you like but ……

Hobbs is the way to go. Their dresses have a line and are very flattering. They use natural rather than clingy synthetic fabrics so the dresses fall and drape nicely.

The Pretty Dress Company has some lovely dress that would suit your shape. They have a good sale section but you really need to scroll right through to find the right one.

Have a look at Jo Browns online,quite quirky a bit different from the high street.

Precis Petite online ,I used to buy a lot from them when they were in Debenhams .I haven't tried the online store but I'm sure it will be worth a look