Gransnet forums

Chat

Use of 'yourself'

(32 Posts)
Beswitched Mon 21-Feb-22 08:53:08

Several times lately I have had younger people waiters, an estate agent etc using the word 'yourself' in a way I've never heard before. "I will ring yourself in the morning", "what can I get yourself?"
Does anyone else find this a bit jarring? What's wrong with the word 'you'?

DiscoDancer1975 Thu 24-Feb-22 09:03:09

I think it’s ‘ polite ‘ talk. We wouldn’t normally speak like that. I notice it a lot in environments where I’m a customer.

I remember years ago...hearing someone say, ( I forget the context), “ It’s not me, myself.....it’s just me”

What my mum used to call BBC English!

Witzend Thu 24-Feb-22 08:58:39

Ali08

BigBertha1

Waiting staff seem to say ' you guys' a lot which irritates me.

I love Mrs. Slocombe's ' I am unanimous in that'.

My DiL works in a chain of hotel restaurants and they were told last year to stop saying 'guys'. I can't remember what they were told to say, but 'guys' is out!!

I wish others would follow suit!

Might add that I wish supermarket workers would not be told to say, ‘Thank you for waiting,’ when you don’t exactly have much choice, unless you want to dump your shopping, go home, and come back later.

‘Sorry to keep you waiting,’ would be IMO far more appropriate.
Though now I come to think of it, I haven’t heard it lately.
Has there been a general management re-think?

HowVeryDareYou Tue 22-Feb-22 16:01:51

I'm 62, don't like being called a "guy" or a girl.

Oldnproud Tue 22-Feb-22 13:53:08

I actually quite like "you guys"

I wonder if age makes a difference here, given that we Gransnetters cover a huge age-range.

Perhaps we should conduct a straw poll on here to find out. But that would mean revealing our ages, which many might prefer not to do! grin

I don't mind though. I am 60.

sodapop Tue 22-Feb-22 13:14:09

I find it irritating as well. The use of 'myself' instead of me. Always seems like an attempt to be more grammatically correct whilst achieving the opposite.

HowVeryDareYou Tue 22-Feb-22 12:22:29

I've heard it too, and it irritates me almost as much as when, in a group, we're referred to as "you guys"

Georgesgran Tue 22-Feb-22 09:51:53

I've heard some tv presenters say 'welcome to the show, with myself, Joe Bloggs' . Surely that should be just 'welcome to the show, with me'? Add Joe Bloggs if necessary.

Oldnproud Tue 22-Feb-22 09:13:07

Ali08

I've heard a few people saying "Her and her husband," or "her and her family," which annoys the heck out of me. It's "She and her husband," or "she and her family."

It does depend on its role in the sentence, of course.
For instance, it would be perfectly correct to say, "We have invited her and her husband to dinner".

But I'm sure you know that. smile

Ali08 Tue 22-Feb-22 03:33:17

I've heard a few people saying "Her and her husband," or "her and her family," which annoys the heck out of me. It's "She and her husband," or "she and her family."

Ali08 Tue 22-Feb-22 03:31:25

BigBertha1

Waiting staff seem to say ' you guys' a lot which irritates me.

I love Mrs. Slocombe's ' I am unanimous in that'.

My DiL works in a chain of hotel restaurants and they were told last year to stop saying 'guys'. I can't remember what they were told to say, but 'guys' is out!!

Germanshepherdsmum Mon 21-Feb-22 14:04:14

I think the mark of a good lawyer is the ability to communicate in plain English. There’s no need to try to sound clever by writing in the way Rees Migg speaks. Sometimes it might be necessary to use a legal term but its meaning should be explained unless you know the client is used to hearing it.

ElaineI Mon 21-Feb-22 13:33:40

Germanshepherdsmum

ElaineI

It is definitely less abrupt than saying you which could be interpreted as a bit aggressive. Mum and me, you and me also sounds better and more friendly than Mum and I so for me, myself and I, it's an improvement.
The guys thing is fairly modern and DGS2 has picked that up from childminder and nursery. Seems to be what young people are saying now and maybe from TV, YouTube.
I don't think people are as fussed about grammar nowadays. Some things like lawyers letters are full of ridiculous wording that has long been dropped by everyone else and can make letters incomprehensible.

When I was a practising lawyer I didn’t write letters that were incomprehensible or full of ‘ridiculous wording.

Very glad you don't and I'm sure many lawyers don't either but sometimes wordings we have had seem very pompous. Our correspondence from buying and selling houses was full of words and statements we had to look up. DD2 has had a few letters from a lawyer regarding contact which are either not signed or have a single initial which is not a signature and things like "I have sight of" which you can understand but why not say "I have seen" or "I have read".

Doodledog Mon 21-Feb-22 11:23:42

Beswitched

nanna8

Sounds Irish to me. Himself agrees.

I'm Irish and we do use myself and yourself in a colloquial way. An older person might say, for instance,
Ah it's yourself, when someone calls around unexpectedly etc.

But this is different. It's a new way of using the word that seems to have been adopted by those who think it sounds more business like to say "I will call yourself" than "I will call you"

Yes, it is different. My grandmother was half Irish, and would talk about my grandad as 'Himself', or say 'And how's yourself?' in response to 'How are you?'.

Not the same as the estate-agent English in my previous post.

ExDancer Mon 21-Feb-22 11:19:47

And I thought it sounded Australian!

Beswitched Mon 21-Feb-22 11:19:30

nanna8

Sounds Irish to me. Himself agrees.

I'm Irish and we do use myself and yourself in a colloquial way. An older person might say, for instance,
Ah it's yourself, when someone calls around unexpectedly etc.

But this is different. It's a new way of using the word that seems to have been adopted by those who think it sounds more business like to say "I will call yourself" than "I will call you"

Doodledog Mon 21-Feb-22 11:12:44

'Mum and me', or 'you and me' can be either grammatical or not, depending on the usage, though.

I think that when 'yourself' is used wrongly it can often be as a result of 'estate-agent English' - the sort that tries to 'upgrade' ordinary words, but can sound ridiculous. A bit like some of the reviews on Amazon, which say things like 'I purchased a larger one because the first had insufficient material in it to accommodate myself appropriately', instead of 'I bought a bigger one as the first was too small for me'.

Ailidh Mon 21-Feb-22 11:02:22

I haven't come across the yourself but am often annoyed by "Myself and X", and "You and I" in the wrong place -"He came to see you and I".

I really mind bad grammar but naturally have learned that it is not done to comment on anyone else's, although I sometimes do when it's an advertisement. In fact, I usually think that if a company can't be bothered getting the grammar right in its self-promotion, then I have little confidence in the service they're offering.

Yammy Mon 21-Feb-22 10:58:01

Like others I think it sounds Irish.

Germanshepherdsmum Mon 21-Feb-22 10:57:29

ElaineI

It is definitely less abrupt than saying you which could be interpreted as a bit aggressive. Mum and me, you and me also sounds better and more friendly than Mum and I so for me, myself and I, it's an improvement.
The guys thing is fairly modern and DGS2 has picked that up from childminder and nursery. Seems to be what young people are saying now and maybe from TV, YouTube.
I don't think people are as fussed about grammar nowadays. Some things like lawyers letters are full of ridiculous wording that has long been dropped by everyone else and can make letters incomprehensible.

When I was a practising lawyer I didn’t write letters that were incomprehensible or full of ‘ridiculous wording.

ElaineI Mon 21-Feb-22 10:50:11

It is definitely less abrupt than saying you which could be interpreted as a bit aggressive. Mum and me, you and me also sounds better and more friendly than Mum and I so for me, myself and I, it's an improvement.
The guys thing is fairly modern and DGS2 has picked that up from childminder and nursery. Seems to be what young people are saying now and maybe from TV, YouTube.
I don't think people are as fussed about grammar nowadays. Some things like lawyers letters are full of ridiculous wording that has long been dropped by everyone else and can make letters incomprehensible.

BigBertha1 Mon 21-Feb-22 10:20:23

Waiting staff seem to say ' you guys' a lot which irritates me.

I love Mrs. Slocombe's ' I am unanimous in that'.

Germanshepherdsmum Mon 21-Feb-22 10:13:08

I haven’t come across ‘yourself’ used in this way but I hear and read ‘myself’ instead of ’me’ or ‘I’ all the time. Drives me mad.

Witzend Mon 21-Feb-22 09:41:55

I dare say people think it’s more ‘correct’, the same as when anyone says e.g. ‘between you and I…’.
Or they somehow think it sounds more formal/professional.

I see ‘myself’ misused rather more. So many posts on MN begin, ‘Myself and dh…’.

Shinamae Mon 21-Feb-22 09:37:52

I would say it’s Irish

Kate54 Mon 21-Feb-22 09:36:01

It’s everywhere, even in educational establishments where people should know better. The incorrect use of ‘myself’ is even more current. I have no idea how this started but suspect it may be that people perhaps knew that ‘me’ (as in ‘Mum and me went to the shops’ when it should be ‘Mum and I’) was wrong so thought it better never to use it at all!
I have seen ‘Please contact myself as soon as possible’ more times than is good for me. I did ask one of fhe culprits once (knowing she wouldn’t mind) and she said it sounded better.
A lost battle, I fear!