Lack of awareness or arrogance.

Oh, well done! ?

I was behind a woman buying a bunch of flowers in a supermarket and she and the assistant launched into a lengthy conversation about the person they were intended for. I asked if they could hurry as the parking ticket was due to expire; the assistant gave me a filthy look and carried on talking, quite deliberately.
So, I took my revenge, albeit at some cost to me. When she finally finished her conversation I let her ring up all the goods, then said, Oh dear, so sorry, I seem to have mislaid my card, and departed, informing the floor manager on my way out.
Takes a long time to void all the purchases. I shopped elsewhere, later.

Usually, no matter what queue Im in and it's likely the pharmacy, Im behind a person who has a long complicated problem. Fair enough if there is a medical issue needing sorted. Folk in supermarkets are annoying. I'm sure at times, they are perfectly aware of the queue. The talkers that is. When I worked in retail I just used to say sorry, but I have other people needing served. Queues aside most people today are completely self- absorbed, they think no one else has problems.

Just waited in a queue in M and S, while one of the three people on the tills had a very loong conversation with the customer. I was getting restive and so was the women behind me. When I finally got to a different till the assistant apologised for the wait, she had obviously noticed what was going on!

Yammy

Dickens

icanhandthemback

The lack of tolerance here is amazing. My mother started to "fiddle with change" when her dementia started to rear its ugly head. She became completely unaware of what was happening around her. Outwardly she looked like a normal person who didn't really look that old but that is exactly why there has had to be a campaign for invisible illnesses. I'm not saying I am without irritation but I give myself a good talking to unless it is an emergency and then I ask nicely if I can be served.

I've had elderly - and not so elderly - people in front of me "fiddle with their change" and I have all the patience in the world for that because there are many reasons why people might not be quite 'with it' at the checkout (or wherever). Apart from dementia, they might have things on their mind and aren't 'collected' enough to focus on the immediate, or they might be ill, or busy and just not thinking properly.

But that's a world apart from those individuals who insist on chatting to all and sundry - anyone who'll listen - about themselves or inconsequential things at the head of a busy queue.

I agree with you Dickens,You can tell the elderly or slightly distressed people who hold things up they usually smile at you and say sorry or something similar. The woman in front of me was at least 20 years younger than me and when she said must Dash I nearly laughed.
None of us have seen many people and I find if I am feeling lonely I go and do a bit of gardening near the front gate. People walking past or walking their dogs usually stop and have a quick natter. I was phoned the other day because I hadn't been seen for a while.
When I worked we had people who always had plenty to say and would try to hog a full meeting. the last head we had was very deft and always asked the people who rarely said anything to speak first and left the vociferous ones till last when it was nearly time to tie up.

I think the point is entirely missed...you think you can tell. Actually, you can't always. It can be an invisible illness. My Mum is now a young looking 80 but when her dementia started years ago you would have had no idea looking at her that she was actually struggling. She was fantastic at masking, deflecting by chatting and a host of actions which disguised her problems. I was equally frustrated sometimes but it has been a salutary lesson to find that it was masking something else.
We have no idea if the person chatting has a host of reasons for needing that chat; women who are controlled at home, carers for other people, just living on their own and feeling so lonely. I have no problem with people having their moment, I feel less sympathetic with the assistant but if they are friendly when I get my turn it lessens the frustration. I do think it is up to the assistant/receptionist to manage the conversation to a large extent.

I think most of us experience this on a weekly basis .
I know I do when queuing in shops.
I seem to be getting impatient in my old age.

And I entirely agree with your point PinkCosmos. I found them a bl**dy nuisance when I was working and have made sure I don’t join their number now I’m retired.

ComeonEileen

^My pet peeve is very elderly couples doing their supermarket shopping at what is clearly a busy time e.g. Saturday or lunchtime midweek^
They shop together and leave the trolley across the aisles thus blocking it. They stand in front of shelves for ages pondering what to buy

How very dare they?
Don’t they know that in Pink Cosmos land they should huddle indoors under their granny shawls and leave the shops to young people? And never hesitate before buying something - unless of course you are working out whether this week’s pension will stand it.
Never mind isolation or loneliness or perhaps chatting to the receptionist or shop assistant is the only person somebody has spoken to all day.
Know your place, old/lonely/sad/depressed people!

This was not my point. My point was that they have all day to go shopping whilst other people have to be at work for 7-8 hours a day and their lunch break might be the only time they have to shop.

I don't for one minute expect them to huddle in doors. May they could work it out for themselves that they might have a better chance of a conversation with the lady on the till if they went when it was quieter.

When I was not working I would avoid lunchtimes and weekend shopping like the plague. Why would you go at a busy time if you didn't have to.

I find that people in shops and public service roles nowadays are rarely taught skills on how to firmly "manage" the queue. For example, customers who dont wait their turn and attempt to divert the sales assistant from the actual customer they are serving. There is nothing so irritating as to be that customer who has waited for their turn, and someone rudely cuts in and monopolises the assistant. All too often it is you, the customer, who have to rebuke the person who pushes in.

I once saw this happen in John Lewis in Oxford Street where a very grand old lady was sitting by the counter, waiting for the assistant to measure out many yards of expensive brocade curtain fabric. A young man came to the head of the queue and began to speak to the young assistant, who got flustered and stopped her work of measuring out the fabric.

The grand old lady rapped her stick on the floor, and said in a remarkable cut glass accent. "Young man, this assitant is attending to ME. Kindly join the queue and await your turn."

He stared at her open mouthed. Again she rapped her stick on the floor and pointed to the back of the queue. He did not stay to argue and slunk off.

If people are blocking the aisle with their trolley I just say, "Excuse me ?" and it works every time!

ourjude

I'm one of the chatters - especially at the shop till.

However...
I start chatting when the cashier looks to me (as the next person up to the till). I chat all the while they're ringing everything up, as I pay (I have my card to hand already) and finish as I grab my bags saying a cheery "see you next time" and wend on my way.

I normally shop at all the same shops (including the PO) and have been for years so I know many of the cashiers (albeit slightly) so I'm not always chatting about my day/life but asking about theirs, asking after the children/grandchildren etc.

I'm always aware of others behind me and try to chat while not holding up the queue at the same time. Even if there's no queue, I try not to hang around chatting too long as I'm well aware the cashier might also have to 'face up', restock or tidy up - or even desperately trying to get off the till for their break!

While working on the tills years ago, I had several of the 'won't-shut-up' brigade. If they were fumbling for payment/loyalty card and I often ended up buzzing for another person to come out and open up a till to try and keep on top of the building queue.

I also learnt to say - sorry, I've got a queue and have to serve the next person now. Usually worked, except for those who were completely oblivious and just stepped to the side while continuing to talk to me...

Thanks for all this good sense!

Maytime2, sorry that you have sometimes been held up on a narrow path.
Until last year I was reasonably fit and healthy. Then I received a bad health diagnosis. Now I use a walking stick and hold onto my husband's arm for safety when out and about. Which isn't often. Where we live the pavements are very uneven, narrow in lots of places, but if I fell and broke something, it could be devastating.
If someone is approaching us , we stand aside, but can not always be aware of someone coming up from behind.

ComeonEileen

^My pet peeve is very elderly couples doing their supermarket shopping at what is clearly a busy time e.g. Saturday or lunchtime midweek^
They shop together and leave the trolley across the aisles thus blocking it. They stand in front of shelves for ages pondering what to buy

How very dare they?
Don’t they know that in Pink Cosmos land they should huddle indoors under their granny shawls and leave the shops to young people? And never hesitate before buying something - unless of course you are working out whether this week’s pension will stand it.
Never mind isolation or loneliness or perhaps chatting to the receptionist or shop assistant is the only person somebody has spoken to all day.
Know your place, old/lonely/sad/depressed people!

?

Grandyma

Trying to choose a greetings card, especially in supermarkets. People will stand reading every card with their trolley blocking anyone else getting a look in.

Yes. I do find it odd that people are unaware of this sort of behaviour. I will stand back to let someone pass in an aisle only to have them stop right in front of me to look at the very thing I was looking at!!! I mostly just take a deep breath. I think it’s a total lack of awareness or lost in thought perhaps? Depending on my assessment of the person, I’ll either wait or say “Excuse me etc”. People are often embarrassed and apologetic because they genuinely seem to have not realised. Some of us are far more spatially aware than others too, I think. With the greeting card situation I do usually just say eg excuse me and it’s never a problem. It usually leads to a mini chat anyway ?

My pet peeve is very elderly couples doing their supermarket shopping at what is clearly a busy time e.g. Saturday or lunchtime midweek
They shop together and leave the trolley across the aisles thus blocking it. They stand in front of shelves for ages pondering what to buy

How very dare they?
Don’t they know that in Pink Cosmos land they should huddle indoors under their granny shawls and leave the shops to young people? And never hesitate before buying something - unless of course you are working out whether this week’s pension will stand it.
Never mind isolation or loneliness or perhaps chatting to the receptionist or shop assistant is the only person somebody has spoken to all day.
Know your place, old/lonely/sad/depressed people!

Of course there’s a whole variety of reasons why people are like this. I (as others have said) life in a village where there are lots of older people and get this sort of thing in the surgery, pharmacy, post office etc. Yep, sometimes it can be very irritating! BUT it is possible to interrupt in a pleasant way, rather than an aggressive irritated way( which would leave me feeling stressed/upset anyway). I don’t find it too difficult to say eg “ sorry to interrupt.......but could I just hand this to the receptionist (smile!). Thanks so much!!” Also, it is the receptionist’s job to manage these situations better but I know that can be difficult. And something that must be happening repeatedly through a working day. Maybe ( like supermarkets) there needs to be a ‘fast lane/no chatting’ ?! One thing I have learned as I’ve got older (having been a fairly angry young woman), is that lots of potentially stressful situations can literally be disarmed by being disarming. If you know what I mean. Smiling meaningfully at people really seems to work. And a few friendly kind words too.

I think this is terrible. Oh dear, you have been inconvenience for a few minutes because someone needed human contact. A few minutes contact with someone may stop the person committing suicide. This is selfish beyond belief. Think before you post. Is this post helpful or is it pandering to my selfish needs I must not be inconvenienced at any cost. Do everything on line.

Yes that’s what I’d like to know!

I wish I didn’t have to keep signing in every time on here! Even though I tap on keep me signed in. AAAARGH!

Trying to choose a greetings card, especially in supermarkets. People will stand reading every card with their trolley blocking anyone else getting a look in.

I mentioned further up that I usually use the self checkout. If I do a bigger shop in Morrisons, I use the one with a conveyor belt. You load your stuff onto the belt and then go to the till to scan it. On the screen it asks if you are using your own bags. If so, (mind you there's not really much choice these days) it says, place your bags in the bagging area and touch 'done' when finished. Then you scan your items and place them straight in your bags, pay and away. But some people, doing a huge shop, leave their bags in the trolley, scan and place each item individually in the bagging area, pay and then place each item individually into the bags they left in the trolley. Why do they do that? It takes twice as long and I'm there waiting having unloaded my stuff onto the belt!

These days I prefer to use the Sainsbury's SmartShop app on my phone, scan, bag, pay and away.

I'm one of the chatters - especially at the shop till.

However...
I start chatting when the cashier looks to me (as the next person up to the till). I chat all the while they're ringing everything up, as I pay (I have my card to hand already) and finish as I grab my bags saying a cheery "see you next time" and wend on my way.

I normally shop at all the same shops (including the PO) and have been for years so I know many of the cashiers (albeit slightly) so I'm not always chatting about my day/life but asking about theirs, asking after the children/grandchildren etc.

I'm always aware of others behind me and try to chat while not holding up the queue at the same time. Even if there's no queue, I try not to hang around chatting too long as I'm well aware the cashier might also have to 'face up', restock or tidy up - or even desperately trying to get off the till for their break!

While working on the tills years ago, I had several of the 'won't-shut-up' brigade. If they were fumbling for payment/loyalty card and I often ended up buzzing for another person to come out and open up a till to try and keep on top of the building queue.

I also learnt to say - sorry, I've got a queue and have to serve the next person now. Usually worked, except for those who were completely oblivious and just stepped to the side while continuing to talk to me...

With the friend I mentioned earlier it most certainly is arrogance. She thinks she is superior to everyone else. Awful attitude.

We're still friends but I never see her. Just a chat on messenger or whatever.

My ex used to do this. He thought he was being friendly. He would say, there's a nice wee girl, she will know about this product. Then instead of asking about his purchase he would compliment her, ask about her family,did she know so and so, did she enjoy working here etc. The same when he went to buy a car or expensive item. He would ask the man what about the football,did you see the match etc until we were all ready to scream.

Goodness me a visit to the Doctors crikey your lucky.
We are still having to ring and get an appointment for him to speak to us and if it’s urgent enough we can go to the surgery.
I must say though my dh went to have a haircut and then went along to our doctors to see if they had the results on his X-ray.
Fortunately they did.

So glad you went with the devil