Another case of cruelty

JaneJudge - I work for a charity which supports children and young people with additional support needs (and their families) and they all say the same thing. There is such a lack of support and information once the young person reaches adulthood.
And to anyone who says to you they wouldn't let their child be looked after by others, they should walk a mile in your shoes. As you say, those young people have a right to make their own decisions and choices - and should be enabled to do so as far as is reasonably possible and practical.

I don't know how parents do it for so long to be honest we were lucky in finding a placement but it is hard and no one gives you any information about how to go about it

Part of my job was to talk to parents about allowing their disabled son/daughter to move on with their lives. The guilt you mention JaneJudge was a common denominator with almost all families.
How much better for them to move into adult care while everything is ok with their families. There are dreadful repercussions if it becomes a crisis situation and the disabled person has to leave home. Unfortunately good residential care for people with complex needs and/or learning disabilities is quite hard to find.

It must be very difficult to be the parent of a disabled child.

I was always happy to know I would be having the weekend off, or had annual leave, as much as I love my job.

and people say to my face they wouldn't let their own child be looked after by other people..which to be honest just reminds me, people forget people with learning disabilities are actually allowed to make their own choices, especially when they are adults!

I agree with you too sodapop but I feel absolute guilt almost weekly (not daily) that I cannot care for my own daughter but I have chosen what is best for her and I am not the best person to care for her - though I also know my own limits. None of it is easy though.

I do think this was a different thing/case OBVIOUSLY but there is a culture within child and adult services to just leave people to get on with it, even if they are struggling.

Agree Sodapop I have a friend with an adult Downs and she looks after him so well she s never been on holiday or even days out as he can’t manage it
I know all the social areas are understaffed but where were the rest of the family? the father ? It didn’t happen overnight and then such a short sentence for slowly torturing your child to death…. oh my beggars belief

There is a big shortfall in support when children with disabilities reach adulthood. I agree JaneJudge . Their needs don't change usually and its much harder to care physically for an adult than a child.
Families are often under great pressure which is a 24/7 commitment.
Of course this does not excuse this or any form of cruelty perpetrated on people who cannot fight back. It does seem that the authorities are reluctant to pursue things if families do not cooperate.
On the other side of the coin, in the course of my work I have seen so many families give up a life of their own to care for a disabled relative, some heartbreaking stories.

I think half of the problem is it comes down to money. I know loads of parents who struggle with their adult child with a disability at home as local authorities wont provide adequate respite. In an ideal world, every vulnerable person like this would be visited by a social worker at least yearly but then again I know of parents who are obstructive too (though I don't think abuse is going on)

I agree that 10 years is nowhere near enough. The level of cruelty is unbelievable and led to her daughter's death

This is dreadful that poor young lady what a life That mother should be imprisoned for life she doesn’t deserve to be called a mother how awful She must have been in agony why didn’t the cousin who visited do more Yes she reported it but surely if you d seen someone in that condition you d have done something more to remove her! Where’s the father in all this ?
Everyone let her down the go visited and was told she was
ok !!!

I think the main lesson should be to absolutely insist on seeing the person.
Although, a doctor did visit once, brushed off concerns, and couldn't gain access next time, so didnt follow up.

I also put this here as it has attracted a lot less attention than child cruelty cases, which is a great pity, since the victim was as vulnerable as a child when denied the support she deserved.

What makes me so cross about these tragic cases is that time and time again the useless, gullible social workers seem to go unpunished.

Repeatedly over the years we hear that concerns were raised by other family members, schools, etc yet the social workers either aren’t firm enough to demand entry, or if they do manage to get in the home, the obvious signs of abuse seem to get unnoticed.

We are always told ‘lessons will be learnt’ but they never are, are they?

That was a distressing read. 10 years is nowhere near enough.

According to the report she has been sentenced to 9years + she'll be out on licence in 6
Will she change her name I wonder?

How very sad. I did read about this yesterday, the poor girl. Why when these incidents are reported there are not visits again and again. Surely the services must be aware that the people involved will be hiding things. I cannot understand it.

Oh 1btw thank you for the link, I dont mind being accused as a DM reader ?

I dont know if it applies in this case, but unless meetings and decisions made by the authorities in question are open to public scrutiny, sad to say, this unnecessary cruelty will continue.

The police do get frustrated by social services when they are not called to gain entry to a vulnerable person. To just leave if they can't get in seems unacceptable to me.

MissAdventure

From what I have read, the "mother" just took the line of not opening the door, not attending appointments, and so, people just went away, time and again.

When social services gained access, and could hear the girl crying in her room, they accepted that she was doing it just for attention, as they were told.

So many times we read that an obstructive parent with something to hide avoids contact through home visits and appointments. I have no idea if social workers have power to gain entry in cases like this but surely alarm bells would ring in these situations and the social worker should insist on seeing the child even if it means police presence. It might save lives.

Sadly, I think we are going to hear more cases as I suspect the pandemic prevented visits and caused delays and backlogs.

Breaks your heart doesn't it?

Social services have a duty of care to anyone vulnerable that might be at risk within their community. They have a legal obligation to ensure safeguarding so that vulnerable people like Debbie aren't abused and neglected. It is a big part of the reason why social services exist

Sounds like the parents are to blame not the social services. They should go to jail. Too easy to blame the ‘authorities’.

Could be..
I had sort of imagined that she could originally manage that side of things herself, but I may be wrong.

I wonder if it was a financial decision as they'd have to pay for care to meet her personal care needs?