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School sports days - agree or disagree

(158 Posts)
Vintagejazz Tue 28-Jun-22 08:39:39

My friend's daughter is keeping her non sporty child at home this Friday because she gets so upset at being humiliated every sports day by trailing in last at everything and in front of all the pupils and parents. My friend disagrees with this approach saying her GD is bright academically and has to learn you can't be good at everything.

But I don't think non sporty kids necessarily want to win medals, just not to have their lack of ability on public show. I mean, we don't ask children who can't sing to stand up in front of the whole school plus parents and sing a solo from The Sound of Music off tune, regardless of how bright they are academically.

Joseanne Wed 29-Jun-22 06:31:24

If I were to ask the young children in my class today what they wanted to be when older, a fair percentage of them would name a sporting career. Sport encourages aspirations.
I really don't understand why so much humiliation is being spoken of. If it is that bad, it is bullying and has little to do with the activity.

Callistemon21 Tue 28-Jun-22 23:20:07

There is no point at all in sports day. It achieves nothing at all for anyone.
I'm sorry, but I think that is a worrying statement coming from a school governor (which I think you said you are, Luckygirl)

Of course it has a purpose and, if run on more modern lines, as some schools do now, there is something for every child if the circuit games are included. It encourages teamwork and there is absolutely nothing wrong in healthy competition either.
No child should be humiliated and all should be encouraged to 'have a go' at something. Teachers who allow humiliation of children should be brought to task.

Having sat through some excruciating musical afternoons at primary school where every child is encouraged to participate in some way and loudly applauded too I might ask what is the point of them.

If sports day is pointless then we might as well forget all competition, Olympics, other Games etc.

Luckygirl3 Tue 28-Jun-22 22:44:40

Maybe we need to ask ourselves what sports day is for. What IS it for?

It is a total pain for those children who do not have sports skills, and for the poor fat child who brings up the rear. Teachers spend their time helping children to understand the importance of working together and of kindness, and then they put them through this humiliation - it does not compute.

It serves no purpose to give the sporty children a chance to shine - they have plenty of this throughout the year - matches with other schools etc.

Sports day adds nothing to encouraging children to be fit and active - it has the opposite effect.

There is no point at all in sports day. It achieves nothing at all for anyone.

All this talk of children developing resilience is utterly bizarre in this context. Of course children need to develop this in relation to the inevitable crap that life will throw at them; but to deliberately set up the crap to test them is positively weird and perverse.

Juliet27 Tue 28-Jun-22 22:23:55

I remember my first sports day. I could only have been 5 or 6 and I was way out in front in a running race, thought I was doing something wrong and slowed down to let the others catch up…or probably overtake me. I well remember the questions “why?”

CanadianGran Tue 28-Jun-22 22:22:17

I was never good at sports, well the kind we had to participate in, anyway. But I still loved sports day because of the break from the usual, the cheering and shouting, etc. Being sporty is also being a good sportsman and supporting others.

Joseanne Tue 28-Jun-22 22:19:18

That's lovely Callistemon, in true sporting spirit.

Callistemon21 Tue 28-Jun-22 22:12:34

I've posted this before that at the DGC's small school the Y6 leavers always run the last race hand in hand so they all reach the finishing line together before they go off to different schools. It's quite emotional to see them.

icanhandthemback Tue 28-Jun-22 22:11:59

BlueBelle

There was a disabled girl in my grandkids sports day she worked so hard but always came last but got the biggest cheer and other kids would often help her staying back to run with her
No they should not be kept home that’s teaching her/ him to be a defeatist not a fighter

I kept my daughter home from Sports Day because her disability made it a grossly uncomfortable day for her particularly if it was sunny as she was unable to wear suncream and burns easily. Although the boys have the same condition, they are not as badly affected so joined in willingly. However, one of them invariably came home injured so it was always a bit of an anxious time for me.

BlueBelle Tue 28-Jun-22 21:53:22

There was a disabled girl in my grandkids sports day she worked so hard but always came last but got the biggest cheer and other kids would often help her staying back to run with her
No they should not be kept home that’s teaching her/ him to be a defeatist not a fighter

Deedaa Tue 28-Jun-22 21:03:10

I was always last in everything at sports day and I don't remember being particularly bothered. On the other hand DD's primary school had trouble trying to get anyone to enter races she was in because she always won. At least once she got to secondary school she was faced with more competition.

Musicgirl Tue 28-Jun-22 20:37:17

I have always been totally non-sporty. My very wise mother told me, when I was in the infants, that I found reading and maths easy but some other children did not and sports day was their chance to shine. I accepted this and did not mind primary school sports day. Secondary school was another matter altogether. I hated it. All the athletes had been picked beforehand and the rest of us had to sit and watch them. It was always the last Thursday before the May half term and always cold and windy. One year, I volunteered to rake out the long jump pit to alleviate the boredom. That said, there are times in life when we all have to do things we do not like and resilience is a good attribute to have. I think letting this girl stay at home because she dislikes sports day is setting a very bad example for the future.

icanhandthemback Tue 28-Jun-22 20:34:05

I hated Sports' Day. I was useless at all the events and there was too much sitting around. However, as a teacher, I saw different forms of Sports' Day, some of which were really good.

lixy Tue 28-Jun-22 20:33:10

I agree with Callistemon that parents should discuss any event causing distress with the school staff. It's the only way to bring about a change.
So, to go back to OP, the parent should be talking to the school rather than condoning truancy.

Callistemon21 Tue 28-Jun-22 20:25:14

Music is the only truly international language that there is and it is an "extra"!

That is not true!

Callistemon21 Tue 28-Jun-22 20:23:39

Physical activity is important for everyone, but sport and ritual humiliation are not

I disagree that children are virtually humiliated at sports
If they are then that is a very poor school and the parents need to have some serious conversations with the Head, teachers and governors.

This should not be happening now in schools.

Luckygirl3 Tue 28-Jun-22 19:39:48

Sport/physically activity is important for everyone.
Music is an extra.

Well - how much that reveals about our topsy-turvy cultural attitudes in this country!

Physical activity is important for everyone, but sport and ritual humiliation are not.

Music is the only truly international language that there is and it is an "extra"!

Deary me. Shakes head ......

Joseanne Tue 28-Jun-22 19:11:53

Fun is the operative word.
Just don't mention the good old British weather scuppering the event!

maddyone Tue 28-Jun-22 18:55:45

Good for you VioletSky. We did a similar type of Sports Day when I was teaching as you describe. I don’t remember any child not wanting to join in. It was fun.

TerriBull Tue 28-Jun-22 17:40:36

I wasn't particularly outstanding at sports, only fair to middling, but enjoyed the orange juice provided on such days the taking part. It also meant that all the important but sometimes tedious stuff got kicked into the long grass for a while. I think it gave the fast runners a chance to shine it was their day and imo it would be unfair to take that away from them and anyway, as others have stated, life is competitive.

I was pleased when my own children were picked for various swimming events, although being boys they were rather horrified when they were told they had to wear swimming hats shock

VioletSky Tue 28-Jun-22 17:40:02

We put a lot of time and effort in to making it inclusive.

If the whole class will be doing the running race, we have matched them up by ability so they all have a chance.

If we are picking one line up for egg and spoon race or sack race by year, then we will look to those who may not have strength in one but do in something else..

No one is forced to participate and can choose to cheer instead or help with equipment.

The main focus is health which means challenging ourselves not each other.

Also I will run with the shy child or the anxious child or the SEN child and they always beat me lol

Mollygo Tue 28-Jun-22 17:33:38

Maggiemaybe

I hope there’s still room for those who are the fastest runners to show what they can do though. Mollygo. Sports Day is often their only chance to do it.

Yes, as I said “didn’t all involve being the fastest runner”. We still have running-different distances, hurdles etc.

Witzend Tue 28-Jun-22 17:21:53

A pushy-parent one - I found this wryly amusing.

Dds’ English -Speaking school in Oman held a swimming gala every year. Dd1 was friends with an American girl who’d recently come from Saudi Arabia, where she’d attended the American school. They were both 10 at the time.

After heats before the day, only about the 6 fastest swimmers were entered for each race in the gala. The American mother was incensed that her dd was not selected for any of them.

She told me that her dd had excelled in the American school swimming events - and they all wore matching swimsuits with logos! - she seemed to think this made them a cut above any old mere English-speaking school swimmers. She evidently thought that the PE teacher must have some sort of prejudice against her dd.

She kicked up such a fuss, that the PE teacher did enter her dd for at least a couple of the races - in both of which she came last.
(And my dd1 came first.)
I felt very sorry for the girl, but given the mother’s attitude (American school swimming must of course be superior) I did find it hard not to feel a touch of Schadenfreude.

Callistemon21 Tue 28-Jun-22 16:49:12

Petera

Vintagejazz we don't ask children who can't sing to stand up in front of the whole school plus parents and sing a solo from The Sound of Music off tune

Clearly we went to different schools...

Petera Are you Diana Ross? ?

Joseanne Tue 28-Jun-22 16:47:43

Sorry wrong thread. Oops!

Joseanne Tue 28-Jun-22 16:30:38

Message withdrawn at poster's request.