School sports days - agree or disagree

Wish there was a like button, Thanks NotSpaghetti and Callistemon21 you've given me a great laugh this morning.

The small primary school the 7yr old attends (as did his Mum our DD) has days in the hall whereby parents and grandparents can come along and participate with the children.

They have had arts & crafts at Christmas and Easter, they are also invited along to numeracy and language/literacy days.

It's all part of learning how to cope with life - some you win, some you lose. The child in the OP is learning from her mother that, if you're not going to be first, top in everything, don't even try. Life's not like that which she will find out later.

Despite me advocating sports at school, I was hopeless at running and athletics but, oddly enough, good at tennis and netball.
Did I feel humiliated because I was the one who kept dropping her egg off the spoon and never won? No, I don't remember that at all, I was probably giggling with a friend at the back.

Sports days should have something for everyone and good teachers should make it fun.

Chemistry day. OK if only those doing chemistry take part but dangerous if everyone had to do it! ???

Vintagejazz

My friend's daughter is keeping her non sporty child at home this Friday because she gets so upset at being humiliated every sports day by trailing in last at everything and in front of all the pupils and parents. My friend disagrees with this approach saying her GD is bright academically and has to learn you can't be good at everything.

But I don't think non sporty kids necessarily want to win medals, just not to have their lack of ability on public show. I mean, we don't ask children who can't sing to stand up in front of the whole school plus parents and sing a solo from The Sound of Music off tune, regardless of how bright they are academically.

Thank you Thank you.
My father wrote letters for me and he played Rugby professionally, I wrote letters for my daughter and she has made sure that her daughter goes to a school where the less able do different P.E to the rest of the class
There is nothing worse than being laughed at because you are non-sporty. I suffered all my life until I got glasses and it was a revelation where the ball was going in tennis and rounders I had undiagnosed tunnel vision.
I was a teacher myself and never made any child do what they did not feel capable of. If you push them they tense up and have accidents.
Sporty people do not understand. Yes someone has to come last but not you EVERY TIME and get laughed at. They wouldn't do that in an academic subject.
My school reports say "Looks as if she should be able but very poor and uncoordinated'. At one of my daughter's parents' evenings, I was told she was like Bambi arms and legs everywhere. Her uncle played rugby for the county neither of his children is sporty either.
Yes, we might need encouragement and learn we cannot always be the best but why should a certain few children in a class be the fall guy at sports every time?

Sports day here last week. All pupils put in teams. They chose four races they would like to be in. Points then awarded on position. All pupils took part, everyone had lots of fun. My daughter’s not athletic but had a whale of a time.

Having said that, I think the culture of the school can dictate how children feel about participation and if they feel that distressed about it, I’d withdraw them.

How many posters on here have ever been to a secondary school sports day? From reading the post, it seems that nearly all (if not all) are about primary school.

Growstuff I’ve experienced both.
I can’t say that I have found them much different.
The secondary ones involve more indecipherable bellowing through loud hailers; forbidden crop tops and sharing of lip balm; and plenty of avoidant wandering about the school site (both students and staff)

No, I’ve never been to a secondary school sports day. I distinctly remember telling DD1 that I would see her that afternoon at her first one, and getting told very firmly that parents weren’t invited. And she was right, they weren’t.

Thanks Yammy good post.

I'm a reasonably healthy 75 year old who managed to avoid school sports, gym and swimming all my secondary school career so I doubt they are essential. At primary school I always came last for reasons I never understood until spirometry at age 50 showed I had diminished lung capacity. I saw no reason to be a loser when I moved up to secondary.

Surely the school (and of course parents) should be bringing up their children to NOT make fun of those who are less able in a particular skill.

To want to withdraw your child because of them feeling humiliated seems to be doing things the wrong way round. We should be ensuring that coming 4th, 5th or last doesn't matter - you did your best. For some children just finishing a 300 yard race is a great achievement.

That's life, I think.
I certainly wouldn't withdraw a child in case they didn't shine as the egg and spoon champion.

I can still remember my friend and I (both not aporty) winning the 3 legged race.
We had practiced during playtime, and it paid off.

It's a set menu not 'a la carte'. A good time for a lesson in enjoying doing something for it's own sake - or buckle up and get through it's only - what? - 2 hours?

I liked school, and it didn't bother me that I came in last or among the last at sports' day, as my parents and teachers took the view that an academically bright child could not be expected to excel at sports, and coming in last for once would do her no harm.

The only thing I disliked about sports' day was the fact that it was usually blustry and cold - any day where the rain is not lashing down in the summer term being call a fair day in Scotland.

As a teacher, I was heartily thankful that sports' day only came round once a year, as I always found myself landed with time-keeping at some kind of sport I knew nothing about.

All the school pupils should attend sports day and those who are willing to participate in competitions and races should be allowed to do so, others can do lots of supporting tasks such as helping get ready for races, give out programmes etc. Keeping a child away from sports day sets them up for all sorts of problems the main one missing out on the fun and then hearing about from their school friends who can share events and exclude the child who wasn't there.

So many saying it is humiliation? What about those non-academics who live only for sports lessons and sports day? It ought to be voluntary to attend, take part or sit and read under a tree...not vilified

growstuff

How many posters on here have ever been to a secondary school sports day? From reading the post, it seems that nearly all (if not all) are about primary school.

Do they have sports days at secondary schools now?

Totally agree with you Vintagejazz… i think they should have team games…. i was always nervous and anxious on sorts days 56 years ago …. my youngest son always hated sports days … i kept him home on sports days the last two years at senior school.. not everyone is good at sport and it can be very humiliating!

I have been to many secondary/senior school sports days (private and state). Football tournaments, gymnastics days, cricket, etc.

They are more competitive in my experience and not all pupils participate.

If not all students are participating it won't be humiliating.
It's the compulsory participation that the girl presumably found upsetting and humiliating. I'm pretty sure if she had been accommodated in some way she wouldn't have this reaction.

We have no need for this bullying nonsense in my opinion.

Lots of people have suggested that schools can find alternatives. I think this school should take note.

My daughter in law is a teacher and she let my grandson stay home on sports day. He hates it and she doesn't think he should be forced into it.

I think the assumption made that it was primary school was because the parent was "keeping the child home". (Most teenagers make their own minds up!)
The humiliating bit still worries me, (yes, overthinking it, I know!). It can't be the child's peers, because surely they already know who is good at sports and who is likely to win. It most certainly wouldn't be the teachers. So are we to assume it's the other parents who are making a child feel humiliated, or is it the child themself who has an issue,?

I think people might well be overthinking it. Yes there are sensitive types who might be embarrassed and yes there are competitive sporty types who like to win but the majority are in the middle and don't care either way . They're having a different sort of day out of school. The presence of Mum and Dad might not be as important as the presence of an ice cream van. Bottom line - many children aren't bothered either way.

the presence of an ice cream van and strawberries, scones and tea for the grown ups!