Historic rape accusation, should we change behaviours?

Thing is, sexual assault survivors are treated as liars from the start by police. Questioned for hours, in detail, about how they were touched, where, when, how often… everything in excruciating detail. It’s often described as feeling like being assaulted over again. So many victims simply can’t handle the trauma compounded by disbelieving authority figures that they don’t complete the report, or are too traumatized to try and make one to start with. And if they do get through it, court is worse. If there’s press coverage, they’re surrounded by people speculating on the worst event of their lives, and there is ALWAYS those who blame the victims and call them liars.

Even when convicted, there’s concern about the rapist’s future vs the victim’s. Brock Turner comes to mind.

False allegations are extremely rare, but get a lot of attention. Would be far more effective to put time, energy and effort in teaching people not to rape than to focus on false accusations.

I was on a jury too, though not a rape case, where people had already made up their minds before even being presented with charge, let alone the evidence. Just their own preconceptions.

Very frightening that someone’s life and family hung in the balance and there were people who couldn’t divorce their personal feelings from the facts.

If you've ever had the misfortune to be on a jury trying a rape case you might, as I did, find some of your fellow jurors gave not a jot of concern about the evidence having made their minds up at the start of the case.

And then decide

Listen to the evidence.
Think about it

Then decide

Look at the responses on this thread and consider that these are the people who will make up a jury.

And then decide.

Thanks Smileless.

I agree that false allegations can be so harmful. That case is so awful. Imagine if it was your husband, brother or son. Because it's not just the person accused that suffers.

Delila

I don’t understand your comment AmberSpyglass. Falsely accused men are not, by definition, raping people.

I don't understand either.

Real murderer.

I don’t understand your comment AmberSpyglass. Falsely accused men are not, by definition, raping people.

Rosie51

Incredibly sad case wasn't it Callistemon21? So sad he died so soon after eventual release. His mother, bless her, never doubted him.

Yes, it was shocking.
Very sad, poor man. Evidence which could have cleared him was not presented in court.

The eal murderer spent over 30 years free and assaulted other children.

false allegations, even if extremely rare, can cost innocent lives and are not to be lightly dismissed yes Rosie. Lives can be ruined by false allegations.

Incredibly sad case wasn't it Callistemon21? So sad he died so soon after eventual release. His mother, bless her, never doubted him.

I remember the case, Rosie51

Evidence which could have cleared him was not presented to court as it was not available to the defence in those days.

evidencebasedjustice.exeter.ac.uk/case/stefan-kiszko/

Stefan's life was ruined by false allegations. But the four girls who said Kiszko had exposed themselves admitted they had made it up “for a laugh." false allegations, even if extremely rare, can cost innocent lives and are not to be lightly dismissed.
Stefan didn't rape or murder but lost 16 of the last 17 years of his life.

AmberSpyglass

I wonder if any of these “falsely accused” men have ever tried… not raping people?

👏👏

I wonder if any of these “falsely accused” men have ever tried… not raping people?

We shouldn’t live in fear of being alone with anyone unless we have reason to have concerns about them. Such incidents happen but are very rare, and the vast majority of men and women are decent and well-meaning. Otherwise we’d need to find a chaperone every time someone, friend, neighbour, tradesman etc. had reason to come into our homes. Who could we trust?

Likewise, why should men be warned to be wary about offering a helping hand in the very extreme case of it being misconstrued?

I don’t believe we should live our lives imagining danger round every corner.

Sago, it would be such a shame if we stopped helping our neighbours, due to the very unlikely and rare 'risk' of false accusations.

The 'sad thread' on which your fears are based is so strange anyway, missing details of the usual procedure, maybe just hearsay.

But it's not in any way safeguarding if the people here are scared if their husband is alone with a woman but not scared if their husband is alone with a man.

I have never been either.

But that doesn't mean that I haven't safeguarded myself as much as possible while safeguarding others.

False allegations are rare. Fear of them shouldn’t stop us behaving with kindness, support to our friends and neighbours.
Take sensible precautions but don’t let fear dictate e very thing we do
I worked therapeutically with children and adults for 40 years, along with colleagues. None of us were made the subject of false allegations.

How can you protect yourself from someone’s delusions?

By always having a witness. By making sure you are never alone with them, in a situation that could be misconstrued. Working with kids in the past, it was advised to never be alone in case they made an allegation that would be their word against yours.

No one can anticipate what might happen years down the line if a neighbour or relative starts symptoms of dementia.

Whatever the sufferer believes is just that, they will not be swayed from their firm belief that something has happened to them either recently or in the past.

MIL had some very firm beliefs when she was admitted to a nursing home, very outlandish, not to mention impossible, but should someone have believed her goodness knows what would have happened to the poor unsuspecting person.

How can you protect yourself from someone’s delusions?

If the lone woman told such a lie about your husband she 'd be guilty of serious slander.

Have you noticed if she is reasonable and decent or if she is irrational and untrustworthy? Does she slander other men, or does she seek ways to extort compensation? Most people are not criminals.

It's not misandry to point out that a man should statistically be more worried about being alone with a man than a woman.