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How many children did you have and was it on purpose ?

(145 Posts)
Floradora9 Sun 12-Feb-23 16:56:37

I look at families with lots of children and wonder how they managed. We only had two on purpose but added babies whom we fostered even when DD was still in nappies . My dream would have been to have lots of children but enough money to have help with housework etc.. We put our DC through uni with no debts having financed them ourselves and have ofter given a helping hand financially which you could not do with loads of children .

Chocolatelovinggran Mon 13-Feb-23 08:25:57

Blondiscot- amen to that- and a virtual hug to those whose childhood made them not wish for children. I hope that adult life has been kinder to them.

DanniRae Mon 13-Feb-23 08:09:12

We had two daughters 23 months apart and 11 years later a son. All very much wanted and adored - we also have 2 grandchildren also adored by us. I don't know why but writing this has made me cry - I guess with happness and gratitude for our lovely family (and our smashing daughter-in-law and son-in law)

EMMYPEMMY Mon 13-Feb-23 08:00:10

I had 3
1 nightmare daughter
2 beautiful sons

Blondiescot Mon 13-Feb-23 07:54:58

However many children you have, be thankful that at least now, women have that choice.

iPadGrandma Mon 13-Feb-23 07:43:28

Our first baby was planned. Then eight months later identical twin girls arrived prematurely, 3 minutes apart, born by emergency Caesarian Section.

The time of birth is recorded on the Birth Certificates of multiple births in England.

The girls were born at St Bartholomews Hospital in London. They routinely scanned expectant mothers at 20 weeks which was remarkable in 1976. So at least we could prepare for their arrival. (The maternity unit at Barts moved to the newly built Homerton Hospital in 1986).

The girls remain great friends and we are all very close.

Grandmadinosaur Mon 13-Feb-23 07:38:58

I have one child. Wanted more but it didn’t happen and as the years went by I couldn’t face starting all over again. Also about 4 years after that birth I was diagnosed with a thyroid issue that can affect fertility.
DH didn’t want any but he and DS are bosom buddies and the GC are the apple of his eye.

MayBee70 Mon 13-Feb-23 07:12:41

I always thought I couldn’t have children because my mum had a terrible time trying to have a child: I was the only survivor of many pregnancies. So it surprised me that I conceived so easily and had such easy pregnancies. I had two planned pregnancies and felt that it wouldn’t be financially viable to have more. I also felt it would be wrong to do more than just procreate ourselves. Having said that, I’ve often thought of the third child that would never be, and if I could have been guaranteed a girl that would be called Alice all of my pre conceived ideals would have gone out of the window.

BlueBalou Mon 13-Feb-23 06:48:26

I have two, with a very late miscarriage between them.
I always wanted two, DH didn’t want any 🙄
Mine are two years and two months apart, one of each and very much loved.
I also have two wonderful grandsons and a fabulous DDIL, I’m very lucky 😊

Catterygirl Mon 13-Feb-23 00:15:39

I didn’t want children because of my upbringing. Won’t bore you all with the details but about aged 37 my husband suggested perhaps I could change my mind before it was too late. I came off the pill and had a beautiful son. We speak every day by text. Our relationship is telepathic.

henetha Sun 12-Feb-23 23:33:33

Two children, both planned (sort of).
I wanted more but no cooperation was forthcoming.

Hellogirl1 Sun 12-Feb-23 23:12:28

We had 5, none of them planned, but all wanted. They are aged between 51 and 59 now, but one of our sons sadly died in November, aged just 53.

Charleygirl5 Sun 12-Feb-23 22:31:43

Allsorts I am now on my own and thankfully I am happy but one cannot get rid of memories.

Allsorts Sun 12-Feb-23 22:12:38

Two children , very much wanted although young, miscarried a child, just wasn't meant to be.
Charley girl, so hope you are happy now, makes me sad to think of you and Kate having had such a rotten time, others who would make great mothers are not able to. 💐💐 to you both.

Janiepops Sun 12-Feb-23 21:59:56

I had 6. All planned. Last one took 3 years to conceive, I was 46 by then.
They are amazing, well adjusted , happy, industrious, young adults. My last was born as my first was graduating, I’m on the back row feeding my baby as my first son walked across the stage to receive his degree!!!
Now got 13 grandchildren and counting, ( my youngest is 24 , not married yet)
It has been a blessed life.
During this time, I’ve had 4 pacemakers, 5 years apart each one,
but my offspring are so kind they watch over DH and I . 🥰

Grammaretto Sun 12-Feb-23 21:51:31

We had 4.
3 boys fairly close together and then a girl 10 years later who was a bit of a surprise.
A wonderful surprise. Our late lamb
They all have DC so we have 7 DGC. Majority of girls.
We are close - at least close contact - but miles apart on the planet and ofcourse DH is no longer here to share the pleasure of the DGC

crazyH Sun 12-Feb-23 21:37:03

Three children, 2 planned and the third, the most wonderful surprise ! He is such a joy 🤩

recklessgran Sun 12-Feb-23 21:34:55

We had 5 girls, none planned - we were just happy with whatever came along. We remain unbelievably happy with our beautiful girls, all completely different and all making a difference in the world in their own ways. Our eldest was born with a very rare and serious genetic defect which means she is severely disabled [born without a cerebellum]. We had genetic counselling and were advised not to have any more. Well, we ignored that and the following four were all healthy and our eldest is still the much adored heart of our family. I thank God every day for them all - they're our whole world. We feel SO lucky to have them.

PaperMonster Sun 12-Feb-23 21:33:42

Would have loved three or four. I have one. My body doesn’t do pregnancy very well.

Callistemon21 Sun 12-Feb-23 21:23:35

Oh, how I hoped my last one would be twins, as predicted by DM.
But she wasn't.

Callistemon21 Sun 12-Feb-23 21:22:42

grumppa

Two, within three minutes of one another.

Very efficient 😀

ginny Sun 12-Feb-23 21:20:10

We have 3 girls. 1 & 2 totally planned. 3 rd was a a bit of a happy surprise. Age gaps of 2 years 9 months and 3 years 7 months.
All much loved and they have good loving relationships between themselves.

grumppa Sun 12-Feb-23 21:18:51

Two, within three minutes of one another.

lixy Sun 12-Feb-23 20:52:14

I have 2 children, both planned.

My G'ma had 5 children and organised her life so that there was a 5 year gap between each one - as one went to school so she'd become pregnant with the next. I think that's astonishing in the 20's and 30's and I have no idea how she did it.

pinkprincess Sun 12-Feb-23 20:48:13

Grandma70s
Like you I had two both boys.I would have loved to have a daughter, but on medical advice I had the tubal tie done during the birth of the second one. I have four granddaughters now!.

Nannylovesshopping Sun 12-Feb-23 20:47:48

I have three and all dearly 🥰