Tipping in Restaurants

In some places we're asked if we're happy to pay the discretionary charge. If not it can be removed. So far we've never asked for it to be removed. Cote, for example, adds a 12% service charge but the service has always been so very good we don't quibble.

I think discretionary tipping is absolutely fine but to have it imposed on us as a 'voluntary' service charge is beyond presumption and greed. I would have that practice formally banned.

Dickens I assume your post was aimed at American grans? Staff here are paid a living wage (at least and sometimes more) and don't rely on tips. However, they're human too so a little extra is always helpful.

Daisymae

That's definitely odd behaviour in the UK. I generally tip 10 per cent and nothing if the service is poor. I know that a lot of people don't tip, can't be the first time it's happened. My brother was in the States years ago and gave the waiter a dollar. The waiter gave it back and said that you obviously need it more than me! Of course they rely heavily on tips there but generally give 5* service.

I think it's quite demeaning that someone has to metaphorically hold their hand out for money from another person; whose generosity will depend on how they view that individual's behaviour and attitude - or might even depend on their whim at the time. Master-and-servant... and the 'servant' has to be gracious and show gratitude - possibly sometimes to those whose behaviour is not very pleasant.

I think it's archaic, undignified and rather soul-destroying.

Someone who waits on tables is doing a bloody job and should be paid a proper wage for it.

And yes, I know it will increase the cost of the meal - but 'competition' - one of the backbones of Capitalism, should have a mitigating effect... if you charge too much, customers will go elsewhere.

Just because your job is customer-facing, doesn't alter the fact that it's still a job. You are giving your time and labour, and that should have a value that doesn't depend on the whimsy or caprice of the person you are dealing with.

That's definitely odd behaviour in the UK. I generally tip 10 per cent and nothing if the service is poor. I know that a lot of people don't tip, can't be the first time it's happened. My brother was in the States years ago and gave the waiter a dollar. The waiter gave it back and said that you obviously need it more than me! Of course they rely heavily on tips there but generally give 5* service.

Wow, that was quick! Well done GNHQ!

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On a trip to the US in February where tipping is normal the bills were advising tips at 18% + we added 10% and got scowls, in one case OH did forget and got harangued.

Meals out and food in general is much more expensive there, even with the recent price hikes here, we did expect this and are grateful it’s cheaper here.

*not restaurant, pub. (Sorry)

And speak to the manager/publican/owner. They ought to know.

If I had witnessed this I would have had to speak to the manager as it's not only abusive it would spoil everyone's meals.

If it had actually happened to me I would have spoken to the manager too.

Could you call the restaurant now and tell them? I would not want to go back to be honest. How rude!!

We always leave a tip and frequently ask for it to added to the bill so the waitress would not know if we had left one in this case . DD always leaves a big tip after experience of waitressing as a student.

I wouldn’t have ruined the night completely by arguing, just left the pub. Personally I always tip if service is good, but it’s customers discretion. Really if I were the manager I would hopefully be on the ball and give that waitress a verbal warning. Her attitude could cost him business and times are hard enough.

I'm very surprised to hear this happening in a UK restaurant. I hope you walked on or spoke to the manager.
Generally speaking we're happy to tip about 10% if we've had good service.

silverlining48

In NY many years ago we left a :10% tip fir a fairly indifferent meal. As we left we were chased along the street by a waiter who rudely demanded why it was only 10% .

Good grief!

But it's a slightly different culture in the US isn't it - I believe they rely heavily on tips, so the employer can pay them peanuts?

Which is of course, wholly immoral.

My stepmother and I had a tip thrown on the floor in disgust - with a little mock spitting motion to emphasise it - in a cinema in Paris in the 50s where it's the custom to tip the usherette. In the darkness of the cinema my stepmother couldn't see what she had in her purse!

On a side note, as a teenager I'd gone to Paris full of romantic notions expecting the men to look like Alain Delon and the women like my idol Brigitte Bardot, and all full of Gallic charm - the pinch-faced, spitting usherette was just another jolt back down to earth.

In NY many years ago we left a :10% tip fir a fairly indifferent meal. As we left we were chased along the street by a waiter who rudely demanded why it was only 10% .

I tip if we have had a particularly pleasant or helpful person waiting on or if the meal & service was exceptionally good. I certainly wouldn’t bother nowadays if any aspect hasn’t been up to scratch or if the waiter has been surly and uninterested.

Meals out cost enough as it is and many restaurants stick on a service charge. That waitress doesn’t sound like the type of person that deserved a tip, how rude!

That’s outrageous. I too would have asked to see the manager.

Gosh, how embarrassing - the waitress demeaned herself.

Regardless of the rights or wrongs of tipping - you just don't publicly harangue people for not leaving one. It's a personal choice anyway.

I'd have had a word with the manager - she really had no right to treat customers like that.

I worked in a deli-come-coffee-shop once. Some people left tips, others didn't. I never got upset about it. There are those who just don't tip - and that's their right if they don't want to, and I had no God-given right to expect it. I would never have embarrassed them, or myself, by creating a scene.

The service has to be exceptional for me to leave a tip. I certainly wouldn't have tipped that waitress, she had no right to ask for one.
If she carries on like that she will lose the pub a lot of business.

Smileless2012

I would have given her a verbal tip on how to address paying customers.

Me too! Cheeky mare!

Clearly, the waitress had never heard of "don't expect it and you won't be disappointed". To assume to get a tip is foolish, to berate when one isn't offered is darn right rude and she didn't deserve one after that.
Tipping reflects good service surely?!
I would have given her a verbal tip.......never eat yellow snow!

i would possibly have increased my speed to get out faster and I doubt if I would ever return.

I would have given her a verbal tip on how to address paying customers.