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A self indulgent grandparent thread

(11 Posts)
Felicititious Fri 25-Aug-23 19:11:31

Can you have a truly self indulgent GP thread where we can vent, without actually looking for a solution???

I'll begin.

We have cared for our grandchild since they were several weeks old ( post natal depression caused a lot of the need for support).

Said grandchild is now eight years old. Stays with us, overnight every week. Goes on holiday with us twice a year. Love the bones of them.

The other grandparents will not do overnights, fair enough. Has grandchild occasionally during school holidays, fair enough. Gets 'thanked' for their valuable input with Sunday lunches, small,gifts etc.,

We get nowt 🙄

Its one of those ' I don't really care, but I do' situations - I'd never complain, because I love every second I spend with grandchild, but seriously???? Son and DiL should be plying us with champagne and chocolates🤣🤣

So, just a thread to vent about our children... and their fantastic offspring 😁

sodapop Fri 25-Aug-23 19:20:00

Thus it ever was Felicititous . Many years ago when I was nursing older people I found it was the relatives who visited infrequently got the most thanks and praise. Those relatives who visited regularly and did things like laundry, care of pets etc were just taken for granted. The Prodigal Son springs to mind.
Enjoy time with your grandchildren they appreciate you I'm sure.

Felicititious Fri 25-Aug-23 19:26:40

Sodapop - I really do enjoy my time with her. She is blooming wonderful😁
Deep down, I know we are appreciated, it just stings occasionally .

As I said, not a pity party, just a thread to be appreciated on 🙂 and if you were a nurse, you deserve some admiration too - so thank you for all you have done 💐

VioletSky Fri 25-Aug-23 19:31:01

I just wanted to say...

I don't think this is a negative

You are a person who genuinely loves their grandchild and obviously has a huge trusted part in their upbringing. I think that is worth so much more than flowers and chocolate

The other person obviously needs bribing and flattering into being a grandparent

Felicititious Fri 25-Aug-23 19:43:50

Thank you Violet 💐 what a lovely thing to say.

I know we have a wonderfully close relationship, and I'm very lucky!

Theexwife Fri 25-Aug-23 19:44:26

I see it as a positive, they think of you as close to your grandchild as they are, and they would not thank each other for looking after their child and are seeing you in the same way.
The other grandparents are outsiders who need thanking with gifts for doing what they are supposed to do anyway.

Now my self-indulgent rant, I have visited my very difficult mother every week for years, My brother only phones and visits once a year even though he lives half an hour from her, yet he is wonderful and can do no wrong whereas I get criticised for only visiting once a week.

kittylester Fri 25-Aug-23 20:17:07

VioletSky

I just wanted to say...

I don't think this is a negative

You are a person who genuinely loves their grandchild and obviously has a huge trusted part in their upbringing. I think that is worth so much more than flowers and chocolate

The other person obviously needs bribing and flattering into being a grandparent

Exactly this.

I don't need bribing to see my wonderful grandchildren.

eddiecat78 Fri 25-Aug-23 20:23:04

It doesn't just happen with caring for grandchildren. I did the bulk of the care for my dad with few thanks. My brother did very little but when he did turn up was taken out for meals and generally regarded as the golden child

Kim19 Fri 25-Aug-23 20:50:14

Yes, I remember this well from my childhood. My lovely Mum was run ragged looking after my Granny whereas my uncle was praised to the high heavens even though he never turned a hand to help her nor proffer a single flower. Just so sad....

Felicititious Fri 25-Aug-23 20:53:53

I keep posting replies, but they are not appearing!!!!

This is a test.

Felicititious Fri 25-Aug-23 20:59:10

OK. I'll try again!

Theexwife and eddiecat, I understand totally! I actually visit and shop for an old chap twice a week. His son, who lives closer to him than me, visits twice a month. They both seem quite grateful to be fair, but I'm always the one 'on call'.

Just bear in mind that you're doing a wonderful thing and treating someone the way you would hope to be treated - thank you 💐💐💐