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People who refuse to slow down in life

(119 Posts)
fancythat Mon 04-Mar-24 08:19:15

Even if it affects their health

There are plenty of people who choose to do it.
Obviously it is their life.

Personally I dont understand it.

Sarahr Sat 09-Mar-24 10:46:02

My DH doesn't stop, even since being diagnosed with heart failure. He would rather be "doing" than sit vegetating in front of a TV with nothing worth watching. He has already exceeded the expected lifespan, given his heart issues, and is fit as a fiddle for someone of his age. I doubt he would still be here if he had listened to the advice of the specialist.

Iam64 Sat 09-Mar-24 08:53:02

Thanks you two. One positive is that having managed RA and inevitable flares, I’m using the life lessons and following the advice from my doctor and physio. I’m wearing the sling, only remove to shower and do the exercises. Yes, shoulders are very painful - I’m so limited as well. Blessed though with family and friends. Daughter picking me up to do a Big Shop for my week - thank goodness for decent ready meals. My inability to chop vegetables Means a much less interesting or healthy diet. But yes, onwards and upwards, tho I certainly can’t move my arm upwards

MissAdventure Fri 08-Mar-24 21:15:33

Ouch Iam64.
Shoulders are supposed to be horribly painful when they're injured.

Best wishes from me too.

Marydoll Fri 08-Mar-24 20:42:00

Iam64

Marydoll - I share RA and various other autoimmune conditions, as well as AF, copd (mild) plus ordinary age related stuff , awaiting hernia surgery and currently a broken shoulder. So lots to get me down but I’m cracking on. 75 next month

Iam64, With a bang and not a whimper, to misquote TS Elliot!

I hope you feel better soon! 💐

MissAdventure Fri 08-Mar-24 19:53:04

I actually died (or passed on) in 1999, but I dug myself back up and kept going....

Iam64 Fri 08-Mar-24 19:48:34

Marydoll - I share RA and various other autoimmune conditions, as well as AF, copd (mild) plus ordinary age related stuff , awaiting hernia surgery and currently a broken shoulder. So lots to get me down but I’m cracking on. 75 next month

MaggsMcG Fri 08-Mar-24 19:23:22

I was fine until I had a knee injury back in September and now I just cant get the same level of energy or enthusiasm. I'm hoping some of it will return when the weather gets warmer. My knee still plays up a bit on occasion and that just makes me feel older. I'll be 72 in April.

TopsyIrene06 Fri 08-Mar-24 19:00:51

Nice to hear you are getting more active and enjoying things although I expect you need to push yourself.
I have been quiet as usual.
Had UTI this week better now.
Sorry about 16th. It’s a treat for me and tickets were bought so couldn’t change things. I expect all of you will enjoy chatting together.
All for now, take care. Jill x

AskAlice Fri 08-Mar-24 18:50:42

I was working full-time in central London until I was 62. Yes, I know that is a "youngster" for some, but it was also taking 3 hours a day to travel there and back each day for the last 16 years of my working life, even though I am only 25 miles from the City because of the appalling, slow and unreliable train and tube service.

I've been retired for nearly 5 years now and, in relative terms, have slowed down a lot. Some days I am full of energy and garden, shop, sew, clean and cook all day. I have full days of childcare or after school childcare at least twice a week. Other days I do nothing much except sew and browse the internet (including Gransnet!) I can live with that, it's my time now and I don't feel at all guilty having worked since I was 16.

My mum was a whirlwind until she was in her late 80s when she became very ill. She was always up early and "doing" until she went to bed. No-one gave her a medal!

Each to their own...

crazyH Fri 08-Mar-24 18:39:27

My GC call me NLB ….I will leave you to guess 😂

Marydoll Fri 08-Mar-24 18:32:58

The trick is to know when to stop. Some days I can manage to do stuff, some days I can do nothing.
It has taken me a long time to stiop feeling guilty and see myself as lazy.

Germanshepherdsmum Fri 08-Mar-24 18:19:52

👏👏👏 Marydoll.

MissAdventure Fri 08-Mar-24 18:08:01

The pace that suits one person won't fit with another's necessarily.
The pace I can manage is almost at a standstill because I physically cannot manage more.

Marydoll Fri 08-Mar-24 18:00:55

Despite multiple comorbidities, including RA, heart failure, deteriorating COPD and extremely high BP, my clinicians approve the fact that I try to keep going. It is a matter of pacing yourself, which took me a very long time to achieve.
Much better for my mental health.

Germanshepherdsmum Fri 08-Mar-24 16:44:35

I expect your friend knows ‘how precarious things are for her’. Let her make her own decisions in that knowledge.

fancythat Fri 08-Mar-24 16:36:49

When the thread has finished, I may ask for it to be taken down.
I have written more than I was meaning to.
Difficult to reply without saying too much, or too little.

At the moment, very few people in rl know how precarious things are for her.

She is no longer able to work due to her previous big health problem.
Again caused by high bp from what I can remember.

As a few people are saying, she is the social butterfly/moth type.

Tenko Fri 08-Mar-24 16:28:18

Blimey , only 60 . From your posts I was assuming she was 80.
I’m also intrigued as to what she does to have sky high bp. Is she working , caring for elderly relatives or GC? Does she do a lot for the local community or is it sports related ? .
At 60 she’s used to a busy lifestyle and doesn’t want to sit watching daytime tv. I know I wouldn’t . I’m 64 and have very busy life and rarely sit down until the evenings. However I’m fit and healthy and don’t take any medications.
Ultimately it’s her choice how to live her life .
I’m wondering if you’re a bit jealous of her active lifestyle.

Iam64 Fri 08-Mar-24 16:24:27

I’m another working full time long hours full on when I was sixty. Just stopped horse riding (arthritic knees) but doing yoga and Pilates. Retired at 62 reluctantly when RA flared badly. Back two days a week the following year when good meds and less stress had me accepting a part time role for 18 months

Germanshepherdsmum Fri 08-Mar-24 16:04:03

Crikey, only 60. I was working 12 hour days with high BP when I was 60. I would hate to have people nagging me to slow down and rest and I expect OP’s friend does too. Where’s the life in sitting in a chair all day at 60? I’m sure she knows the risks - her choice to live her life as she wishes. Better a shorter life lived how you wish than a longer one slowly vegetating.

Norah Fri 08-Mar-24 15:01:30

I've never felt I needed to slow down, soon I may but I hope not.

Whiff Fri 08-Mar-24 12:01:38

Gundy 20 years working in a hospital you have seen the worst and best in people. Without people like you the NHS would grind to a halt. I have that much help from hospitals especially since I moved here . The healthcare here is brilliant . Like you I am glad to wake up every morning. And I look forward to the day. I don't do what's ifs . I live for the now and future. I think it's important to keep are minds and bodies active as much as we can. Over the years I have realised physical health problems can effect your mental health and vise versa.

I help people as much as I can because I can't be any other way . My 94 year old neighbour calls me nought but a girl. Age is just a number. My mom always said older never old. 💐

Eirlys Fri 08-Mar-24 11:57:32

If I slow down any further people will waat to check my pulse! I love doing very little except the things that I enjoy doing. Old age does have its compensations.

Amyright Fri 08-Mar-24 11:51:38

Yea different sets of people …

HelterSkelter1 Fri 08-Mar-24 11:15:31

Goodness 60 is young...still very much working age.

If her medics say slow down or you will have a heart attack then maybe she should listen to them.

Keep moving is my advice.

What I cannot stand and hear so often is the boasting of how much people do. Just live your life as you want and don't boast.
I don't care how much you do and how all the committees etc would fall apart without you and how exhausting it all is !!! Yawn.

Gundy Fri 08-Mar-24 10:57:43

Whiff In no way was I criticizing you or others that have been challenged throughout their lives. I have much more empathy than you give me credit for (of course, you don’t know me) - I could not have done the kind of work in the hospital that I did for 20 yrs, without a shred of compassion.

What I was addressing is seeing these “acquaintances”, not my friends, who run around like scatterbrains trying to find themselves. Two, three things a DAY (?), not in a week, and they’re still not happy. They are lost. I see it for what it is. These narcissistic types actually repel people. Those are the ones I was referring to.

So I’m not calling you out Whiff, you are coping just like everyone else here; you really laid it out here for all to read. We are all in our senior years just grateful to wake up each morning and do the best we can do. Enjoying the little blessing we have and helping others is actually seeing the big picture in life.

I’m wishing YOU and everyone a good day.