Great put downs for rude people

If someone fails to say "thank you" I say "Don't mention it... oh, you didn't".

Like many here I usually think of the comeback a couple of hours later but my best reply came instantly. After teaching a class of teenagers, on their way out one of the boys said "Miss, your hair is really grey!". I responded with "Yes, and when you are my age you'll be bald!". You should have seen his face!

I have read an account of this meeting. It didn't end there . The man, furious, said "F* you!" whereupon the airline assistant, replied, :There's another queue for that, Sir."

...and speaking of rude people, what do you think of Madonna's fauxpology? www.billboard.com/music/music-news/madonna-apologizes-fan-wheelchair-sitting-concert-celebration-tour-1235628982/

When I encounter an extremely rude salesperson - I sympathize with them - saying - “This must be so difficult when you are just a volunteer”. When they protest that they are indeed an employee - I tell them that their boss would not be amused to see a supposed “employee” behave in such a manner!

An elderly friend of mine said her retort to someone who was rude to her would be…..REALLY said in a very long protracted and quizzical manner. It’s not rude, but just makes you feel a little better.

when i had to deal with people on the phone, there was a man who swore at me a great deal. I suggested that he should put the phone down if he could not stop swearing at me and he did!

Hyacinth384

For anyone who doesn’t say Thank you if I hold a door open for them etc, I say rather loudly ‘you’re welcome’. Just loud enough for them to hear, you know?

Ha I do this too. Or if they push past you, in the store, I always say , loudly, "oh excuse me, please."

Unfortunately manner have gone out the window since lockdown if I hold door for someone and they don’t thank me I always say your totally welcome why thank you get some dirty looks lol

,ignore them and silence, they are rude ,what you say won't dent their entitlement.

I’m surprised that, in this day and age, anyone would use the “do you know who I am?” retort.

Many of the clients I worked with (homeless and vulnerably housed people) were very rude initially, but I understood it was usually born of frustration and intolerable circumstances and tried to model patience and good humour.

However, one homeless client, publicly schooled and from an extremely wealthy background, was intentionally rude and entitled on countless occasions. One time he was berating me publicly and I gave him the worst dressing down I suspect he’s had since he was in short trousers. Although his attitude generally didn’t change much he became much more circumspect with me - and other clients who witnessed or heard about the exchange became less intimidated by the man’s bullying ways.

There is a fabulous little video that was fimed in the USA. It shows an airline assistant who is being harangued by passengers whose flight has been cancelled. As she is dealing with the long queue an aggressive man pushes to the front and demands she attend to him first, when she is spoken to very rudely by the man who finally comes out with the 'Do you know who I am' comment she calmly reaches for her tannoy and announces to the whole airport ' There is a gentleman here who appears not to know who he is, have you lost someone?' Brillaint.

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My stepbrother was once dealing with a very rude woman who obviously had no idea about customer service. His parting shot was, ‘Tell Cinderella and your other sister I’m asking for them!’ Probably won’t have got away with that one in this day and age.

I really need to memorise zome if these answers. Usually I come up with so'ething witty hours later. But once I answered a very rude lady with : do you need to be this rude or have you other options in your set-up. She marched of.

Catch more wasps with honey ….. it’s rude to correct …. oh dear

I am so pleased to read these responses today..........I will be at a meeting tomorrow where I am sure to come across the usual rude, ill mannered individuals that move amongst us...........I now have some cracking retorts

Some great answers on here, but regrettably all of my witty, earth stopping ripostes are in the early hours of the morning as I lie in bed going over the event!

I find that my easiest response is the melange of Paddington bear stare and Lady Bracknell sharp intake of breath.

I used to manage theatres, in my early twenties at the beginning my career I was dealing with an aged star of the 60's and a petulent 'don't you know who I am.'
My response, 'sorry, wasn't born for most of it.'

Working in the public domain years ago I learnt its best to ignore rather than retaliate. I found it very difficult at first being a red head. It didn't take much to rattle my cage but I managed it in some very difficult circumstances.

Jaffacake2

It was a busy train from Oxford to Reading and I really felt very tired. I noticed a free seat with a briefcase on it next to a man in a suit.
" Excuse me can I sit down please ? "
His reply , " But my case is there "
" Does your case have a ticket because I do and I'm sitting there ! "
Reluctantly he moved his bag,rude man

I once used the line "I'm glad to see that you have paid for two seats" in a similar situation. Fortunately, a polite man nearby got his older son to stand up so that l could sit down.

I use , “ sorry was I talking while u were interrupting? That usually stops them in their tracks.

I like "did you mean that to be funny or just unkind?"

Crudely, some people here would ask, ‘ what’s up your a**e?’

I use " don't give up the charm lessons"

a friend worked in security for years, he did a lot at the secc in glasgow, simple minds was the main band that night, jim kerr came up to the door and was asked for his name, he replied with the don't you know who i am, my friend replied with, if you don't know who you are son ......how am i expected to know. typical glasgow humour.