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Visitors

(32 Posts)
Tiley Wed 29-May-24 11:28:29

We are lucky having friends scattered all over the country who come and visit us regularly and we love it. So far this year have had 7 couples to stay usually for around 3 to 4 nights with quite a few more booked in over the summer. Only thing is we Don't have time to book a trip away ourselvesgrin. So just in the process of tidying the motor home for a trip away probably just down to Cornwall.

ALANaV Sat 01-Jun-24 20:43:03

We moved to Spain ...suddenly found acquaitances were our 'friends' .....and could they come to stay !!!! (we always said yes of course ! cost us a fortune !) THEN we moved to France ...same again ...got fed up with all and sundry just TELLIING us they were coming to stay ...even one pair who 'had' to have a separate fridge to keep the husband's 'special food' in ...luckily we did have a spare ........took them out everywhere ...got so fed up over the years ...I said to them (ha ha ..the LAST TIME they turned up) ...nice to see you AGAIN ...I will come and stay with you when I come to the UK in January for the sales ....................I never heard from them ....I also send a brochure showing gites and caravans they could stay in !! grin

foxie48 Sat 01-Jun-24 17:35:45

I love having friends to stay but we usually have them arrive for tea and cake in the afternoon of the first day, go out for a lunch and supper, I do one supper and lunch and they leave on the third day in the afternoon. It makes life easy and they always with come with wine, flowers, nice chocs etc and pay for the evening meal . When we stay with friends we do the same routine. My FIL used to say "guests are like fish, they start to go off by the third day". It made me laugh but now I'm older I do understand what he means. Have a lovely break Tiley and enjoy your friends, I find mine give me so much pleasure.

Theexwife Sat 01-Jun-24 16:33:32

I wouldn’t like that at all but know some people love hosting.

Cabbie21 Sat 01-Jun-24 15:54:40

I am hoping once I get a spare room sorted, to invite friends to stay. The only overnight visitors we have had in the last ten years have been family.

crazyH Sat 01-Jun-24 15:17:00

I do have family/friends from abroad and the UK, staying over for days/weeks. But they always help with the housework, cooking etc. My sister-in-law from Canada stayed with me for nearly 3 months. She did most of the cooking - brilliant cook 😋 The last one to stay for a couple of days was my nephew from Hull. BUT if my visitors happen to be early risers, they have to make their own breakfast. I don’t stir till about 8a.m. and by the time I get downstairs, it’s nearly 9a.m. It has worked, so far.

JdotJ Sat 01-Jun-24 14:57:50

Wishing you all the very best Tiley. May you have lots more visitors this year.

Babamaman Sat 01-Jun-24 14:37:14

Totally agree with you ! Freeloaders not true friends! When do you visit them?
Book your holibobs and just tell them the hotel is closed and that’s it!
Not very thoughtful of them

AGAA4 Sat 01-Jun-24 14:33:04

When I had my four bedroom house we often had guests. I enjoyed it but I was younger then. Now I have downsized I have less visitors but I am happy with that as I don't have as much energy these days.
Enjoy your visitors Tiley and have a good holiday.

Norah Sat 01-Jun-24 14:25:29

Poppyred

That would be my idea of hell on earth, but hey ho if you enjoy it, then why not.

Indeed.

I'm happy for you.

I dislike overnight visits, from anyone. Generally we have no overnight visitors. Near Christmas, perhaps a GC/GGC overnight. We used to have all our daughters overnight near Christmas, but we decided that was too much work. We much prefer one day only, separate visits with each of the 4 families.

AreWeThereYet Sat 01-Jun-24 14:24:44

I'd much rather have people to stay than go and stay with them. I rarely feel comfortable in other people's homes, no matter how kind and considerate they are. Sadly most of our visitors now are family rather than friends - most of our friends are like us, and like to stay at home grin

Tiley Enjoy your trip.

11unicorn Sat 01-Jun-24 14:19:41

That is wonderful Tiley. I hope you have a lovely short break and many years ahead of you with visits from your friends.

It sound great to me and over the years we had many friends coming to stay at ours. Not quite as busy as you though. We still host friends coming over for a day often although not overnight as not many make a long trip - though they are always welcome here too whenever one decides to visit us - we moved to the USA right now but had family already joining us 3x and my sister & hubby will come for nearly 3 month soon. My door is always open.

Sennelier1 Sat 01-Jun-24 14:14:38

You really should put a limit on who's coming over when and for how long. Carve out a nice few weeks for yourselves and declare your house not-available in that time. When I was growing up my parents owned a large house at the seaside. My dad worked extremely hard and needed to be away from it all in the week-ends because people would come and ring day and night 7 days a week. We spend not only the week-ends there, but all holidays and the whole month of august. Now imagine about everybody we knew developed accute healthproblems that required sea-air to be relieved..... My mother's family especially took it even further and often left their children with us "because they seemed too tired to drive them home", often for several days or untill my dad needed to head back to his work and drove to CFers home himself. My mother loved the company but I had to run all the errands, prepare food for everyone, watch the children, make the beds, clean the house etc. I hated it! Sometimes I was so tired I joined my dad when he drove home to work, under the pretence I had a special music class or such. Just to be able to be on my own for a few days without anybody screaming at me for more Danish, softdrinks or baguettes or to take the little ones to the beach.

Poppyred Sat 01-Jun-24 12:25:54

That would be my idea of hell on earth, but hey ho if you enjoy it, then why not.

cc Sat 01-Jun-24 12:21:09

I've always liked the friends who come with a bottle of wine or a small present and take us out for a meal! However we used to live in an attractive tourist city and over the years we've had a few freeloaders who seemed to use us like a hotel and never offer to have us to stay in return.
Now we've moved to somwhere far less desirable and have had few guests other than grandchildren during school breaks.

sazz1 Sat 01-Jun-24 11:48:01

I'm still cleaning and have just put the last load of washing on from a 5 night stay by son daughter and 2 DGC. Luckily OH did the shopping and cooking for them all. Sadly it ended in an argument with my DD which has left me feeling why did I bother. Not unusual as we tend to clash if we're together more than a day or 2. Think I might limit it to just weekends now and OH feels the same.

mousemac Sat 01-Jun-24 11:37:32

It occurs to me that several people commenting on here would not last long in hospitable societies such as Greece.
For some of us, the pleasure of receiving guests far outweighs the cost.
And the cost is far smaller than an extravagant holiday among strangers.
But that's just me.

Davida1968 Sat 01-Jun-24 11:34:28

I take my hat off to you, Tiley. I couldn't cope with so many visitors. Frankly it's not the "linens" issues that I find tiring, but all the cooking, cleaning, tidying, & other preparations. Also the disruption to our own regular routines & activities. As regards having visitors who stay, then a few visits from family members is fine with us - but no more than that. However each to their own, and if you truly enjoy having frequent visitors, then why not?

Tiley Wed 29-May-24 18:50:10

I have always said good friends are hard to come by. Ours have all been there for us and kept our spirits up when we were low and basically kept us sane and laughing.

LauraNorderr Wed 29-May-24 18:45:00

We’ve been very lucky to have had friends who come to stay but never impose and always return our hospitality.
Now living a small flat has limited our ability to entertain and I do miss it.
Carry on enjoying life Tiley with all your lovely friends who return your generosity.

Kim19 Wed 29-May-24 18:37:36

I love having people to stay. Yes, the aftermath is quite hard work but I pace myself and stagger the clearing up process.

Tiley Wed 29-May-24 16:30:52

Thank you Oreo I fully intend to.

Oreo Wed 29-May-24 15:42:49

You enjoy life and your visitors, life is for living.😃

Tiley Wed 29-May-24 13:11:35

HelterSkelter1

I too have an incurable but treatable cancer. Non Hodgkins Lymphoma. And it certainly changes your perspective on life, the future and seeing friends. If DH weren't ill I would be doing as you are. Not the motor home as we haven't got one. But we would be off in it if we did.
Have a great summer.

Thank you. I agree it does change your outlook on life. None of us know how long we have left to live but live life to the fullest that you are able. I have non small cell lung cancer which has spread.

Georgesgran Wed 29-May-24 12:33:47

DH often had people, associated with his hobby to stay. Most brought a bottle, chocolates or flowers. More acquaintances than friends, but always made very welcome.
At least they were off out all day with their dogs after breakfast and after mulling over the day at dinner, they were usually ready for an early night.
I always provided packed lunches - tbh I had it all down to a fine art.

HelterSkelter1 Wed 29-May-24 12:21:32

I too have an incurable but treatable cancer. Non Hodgkins Lymphoma. And it certainly changes your perspective on life, the future and seeing friends. If DH weren't ill I would be doing as you are. Not the motor home as we haven't got one. But we would be off in it if we did.
Have a great summer.