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Stray cat - WWYD

(60 Posts)
WoodLane7 Thu 22-Aug-24 09:07:14

First time posting a new thread so please try and be gentle; not an AIBU, rather a WWYD

A very young, small and thin but lively and friendly cat turned up a few days ago and moreorless moved herself in (we already have 2 cats who seem a bit bemused by new arrival but not freaked out). I put pics on a couple of local Facebook chat groups asking if anyone recognises her (made it clear that I would want some kind of proof in the form of pictures, video etc from anyone coming forward, I wasn't about to hand her over to any random person) and a lost and found charity has also been contacted. We also popped her to our vet to check for a microchip but there is none. Vet reckons she is 6-12 months and seems healthy, albeit rather light and thin. Seemed voraciously hungry initially but not quite so bad now having had a few good meals, albeit she is still quite food-orientated.
A lady messaged me with a photo that looks exactly like her; said her cat had been missing since Feb - she lives about 3 miles away from me. I responded, we spoke via video call and said she would call round in the afternoon - that was a couple of days ago. Not a word since, and no results from lost and found.
We are happy to keep her - already getting very attached to be honest and she seems to have her paws well under our table. But is there anything else I should be doing? I haven't chased the lady who contacted me because I am feeling that if she was that keen to have her cat back (if this is her cat) then she would have been in contact by now and I don't want to send her back somewhere she may have run off from, but should I be being more proactive? Any words of advice appreciated and thank you for reading

Calipso Sat 24-Aug-24 14:37:24

@Buttonjugs

She already said the cat has been neutered. Why don’t people read threads?

Why indeed?
I can't see anywhere where it says this little female cat is neutered - it's almost impossible to tell. You have to watch behaviour. When they come into season (what my DH calls Nightclub Behaviour) you know for sure. Cats are fertile throughout their lives unless neutered. It would be lovely if the OP came back to tell us what she decided.

Nicky7of7 Sat 24-Aug-24 14:20:07

Just a thought, the Vet says the cat is between 6 and 12 months old. If the lady lost her cat in February that is 6 months ago so the cat would only have been a kitten then not a fully grown cat. I agree with other posters if this lady had loved and cared for her cat it would have been chipped. If it was one of my cats I wouldn’t be able to wait I would be there in a heartbeat, with photographic proof and proof of vaccinations etc. keep her she has chosen you for a reason. You are blessed.

jocork Sat 24-Aug-24 13:19:11

When our last cat went missing he was gone for about three weeks. We leafleted the area and even put leaflets in shops in the town centre. He eventually turned up in the garden of the lady who ran the animal charity shop in the town where one of our leaflets was displayed. He was about to fish her pond and when she went to chase him away she recognised him, called his name and he went straight to her! She was on an estate on the opposite side of town. When she phoned us - our number was on his collar - we went to collect him in minutes, we were so relieved to have him back home! I can't imagine leaving it even an hour or two if it is genuinely your loved and lost pet, let alone days! I'd be adopting this cat if it was me.

HiPpyChick57 Sat 24-Aug-24 12:48:17

You’ve got yourself a cat op. She’s chosen you.
The woman who contacted you maybe her cat came back and she couldn’t be bothered to get in touch to tell you.
The little kitty seems well settled where she is with you and you’ve done all the right things.
Now I’d get her chipped and vaccinated and enjoy this latest addition to your lovely four legged furry family.

GrannyGroves Sat 24-Aug-24 12:33:22

I think the reply from Gummie is good advice. If the woman you spoke to really is the owner and wants the cat back, then surely you would have heard from her since with an apology for not turning up. Get the cat microchipped and get any vaccinations done that are needed, but also get full itemised receipts from the vets, so that if the woman gets back in touch you can tell her you're not letting her have the cat back without being reimbursed. You don't want the health of your cats put at risk from the young one, so you're being a responsible cat owner by doing this.

I wish you well with whatever the outcome and either way I wish kitty well with old or new (you) owners! 🐱

Desdemona Sat 24-Aug-24 12:13:37

I would not be contacting the woman who tried to claim her - I don't think she owned the cat in the first place to be honest.

You have done everything you could possibly have done to find the owner. Allow a few days in case the woman does show up (even then ask for proof of ownership.)

Sounds to me like you own a beautiful new cat.

Buttonjugs Sat 24-Aug-24 11:46:15

grandtanteJE65

First find out whether you are legally permitted to keep the cat, when someone has claimed her.

If you are, go ahead and keep her, but do please have her neutered and vaccinated. Otherwise you put your two cats at risk of infections they may not survive, and you land up with a litter of kittens you cannot find homes for.

I myself would contact the lady who has been in touch, asking if she is going to come and see the cat and decide whether it is her cat, and if she wants it back. Make it plain you are willing to keep the cat.

If you return the cat to her, and it walks back to you - for any cat I have ever known could cover 3 miles in the course of a few days, if it really wanted to, you will be facing a new dilemma, which it might be well to broach if the former owner does want the cat. If she does, ask her what she wants to happen if it does make its way back to you.

She already said the cat has been neutered. Why don’t people read threads?

Flower21 Sat 24-Aug-24 11:30:48

Keep the cat as your own. The supposed owner has already proved to you that she doesn't consider the cat a priority since she didn't rush over to collect him as most people would if they were genuine. You have no evidence that the animal is even hers as the cat isn't chipped. Have the cat registered and chipped under your name and keep her. The woman sounds dodgy to me... He is yours to love and protect now. You are his mum now. It's very lucky that he wasn't chipped so there is no problem now. You have taken every possible step to find the original owner. That is the steps a cat charity would have taken before rehoming. Enjoy your new pet! And well done for not looking the other way when finding a stray.

TwinLolly Sat 24-Aug-24 11:30:32

Give it a week and if the woman doesn't get back to you, take it to the vet and have it microchipped in your name. Keep it and give it a loving home.

knspol Sat 24-Aug-24 11:21:59

I would definitely contact the woman once more to make sure she"s not coming for the cat. She may have had some sort of problem and not be able to visit. I should want to check that if it's her cat she definitely does not want it back. No point letting you or the cat get used to your home only to be whisked away in a couple of weeks if the woman has a change of heart.

SillyNanny321 Sat 24-Aug-24 11:15:56

Little cat has decided where she wants to be, obviously wants to be with you so please keep her, love her & be happy with her! That woman does not sound as if she had really lost her cat! Do not trust her unless she has absolute proof of ownership! Anyway we do not own cats, they own us & this little cat now owns you! Be happy!

watermeadow Thu 22-Aug-24 20:34:48

So many cats are lost or run over or get carried away after climbing into a vehicle. Keep them in to keep them safe.
The days are long gone when dogs wandered loose and it’s time cats also stayed home, to protect them and the birds.

Calipso Thu 22-Aug-24 17:08:44

You make a fair point Cabbie21 however there are other factors to consider.
Many cats are indeed chancers and tap into the kindness of strangers. The cat that I took in was voraciously hungry, dull rough coat and full of tapeworms. She had an injury to her hind leg, probably an airgun pellet, and her teeth were in terrible condition. She had clearly had a long and difficult struggle to merely exist.
So I guess what I'm saying is - take an intelligent view and consider all options. As an experienced cat owner, I hope the OP will trust her instinct and follow her kind heart.

BlueBelle Thu 22-Aug-24 17:04:53

In the old days cats always ‘found’ their owners, all my cats ‘found’ me it was very different then, no indoor cats and no FB, you could put a notice up on the local newsagent and you could ask around but mainly the cat choose their own home.

I am totally in the corner of those that say if the lady hasn’t bothered to come for her cat, ( if it is her cat ) then she’s not very eager to have it back and the fact that she/ he was thin and hungry and you’re happy to give her a good home says it all keep her and love her

HowVeryDareYou2 Thu 22-Aug-24 17:02:17

Gummie

You now have another cat. Do not contact the woman again!

If she turns up tell the cat left of it's own accord. If it was hers and she loved it she would have turned up.

It frightens me the people that take cats (and dogs) with no evidence that they are fit to own them and don't want them for horrible reasons.

I agree.

Any decent, responsible owner would have
1) had the cat chipped, and
2) have been searching for it, via Facebook, posters, local newspaper, vets, etc.

The cat will be far better off with you.

Cabbie21 Thu 22-Aug-24 16:50:25

I am going to offer a different perspective. Please do not take offence.

Sometimes on our local Facebook page we see a post from a cat owner asking people not to feed or take in their cat, photo supplied. They want him to stay with them and eat the food they give him as his rightful owners, not go begging.
Is this a possibility?

I don't own a cat and I don’t put out any food for any cats that stray into my garden. Consequently no cats hang around or mew to come in. It is a two way process.

I hope you get this sorted soon.

HousePlantQueen Thu 22-Aug-24 16:39:53

One of our cats developed a habit of popping out in the afternoon, and then coming back just about in time for News at ten. We worked out that he was going to visit someone and being put out the door at bedtime. This continued for some months, we knew where he was ( an elderly chap nearby), then he 'disappeared ' for a couple of months, but was spotted occasionally. He eventually came back, never strayed again, no harm done. We referred to it as his gap year.

Indigo8 Thu 22-Aug-24 16:29:11

A work ex-colleague told me about when their family cat went missing. She and her twin sister lived in a rather strict household and her mother had strict rules about where the cat was allowed to be. She was also strict about not allowing the girls to smoke although they both wanted to.

The two girls both went to the same school and they used to smoke on the walk home. One day, shortly after the cat had left home, the girls popped into the off licence, attached to the local pub, to buy fags and there, curled up by a log fire in the public bar, was their runaway cat.

They never told their mother, partly because of the smoking, but they also felt that the cat must be happier living in the pub.

QuaintIrene Thu 22-Aug-24 16:07:54

Keep the cat. If she loved her cat she'd have been round asap.
This reminds me of a cat I once had, very much loved and cared for. I noticed over time that she was going missing for a afternoons then days and eventually overnight. She always came home, clean, dry and not hungry at all.
Anyway I was leaving the area and the "To Let" board went up. A few days later I answered the door and there were 4 children with their father on the doorstep. Children in tears.
Turns out dad had a takeaway and was feeding her meat from the kitchen. Kids loved her -
"Please can we keep her, we love her very much !"
What could I say...I only moved a few streets away in the end and yes, she had a long happy life dining on chopped beef and donner meat.
Cats know where they are better off !

Calipso Thu 22-Aug-24 12:04:51

I would take a rather different view grandtanteJE65

If my cat had been missing since February I would be there in a flash. There is a massive red flag there. Remember that the despicable dog fighting groups collect cats to use as bait and will often send plausible women to claim cats that have been found.

If the OP has posted photos of the cat on FB, it is entirely possible that those same photos could have been digitally manipulated to "claim" ownership.

JdotJ Thu 22-Aug-24 12:04:02

Keep it and get it chipped to you.

Ignore other lady

petra Thu 22-Aug-24 11:57:56

I always say cats choose their owners: this one chose you.

grandtanteJE65 Thu 22-Aug-24 11:54:42

First find out whether you are legally permitted to keep the cat, when someone has claimed her.

If you are, go ahead and keep her, but do please have her neutered and vaccinated. Otherwise you put your two cats at risk of infections they may not survive, and you land up with a litter of kittens you cannot find homes for.

I myself would contact the lady who has been in touch, asking if she is going to come and see the cat and decide whether it is her cat, and if she wants it back. Make it plain you are willing to keep the cat.

If you return the cat to her, and it walks back to you - for any cat I have ever known could cover 3 miles in the course of a few days, if it really wanted to, you will be facing a new dilemma, which it might be well to broach if the former owner does want the cat. If she does, ask her what she wants to happen if it does make its way back to you.

Georgesgran Thu 22-Aug-24 11:47:03

When DD2 was discharged from a long stay in hospital, we often ate in the garden at night. Soon we were joined by an enormous fierce looking tabby, who would eat anything we threw at it. A week later, I found he had been living on our garden table, under the folded down umbrella. I made enquiries and it was decided the cat belonged to the new gamekeeper on a nearby estate. By this time, the fierce looking cat had turned out to be the daftest, friendliest puss ever. DH doubted a gamekeeper would have a cat, but I took him to the keeper’s house, where he loudly disclaimed any knowledge of the animal, which was purring very loudly in my arms. I was pleased and brought the cat home.
Alfie lived the rest of his life with us - unfortunately he was a good hunter, his biggest gift being a fully grown stoat! Always fur gifts, never feather.
He became quite ill when he was older - thyroid and heart. Medication worked for a while, but he lost weight, despite a luxury diet, then one morning he went out and never returned. We believe he’d gone off to die and hope his end was quick and painless. 😢

Davida1968 Thu 22-Aug-24 11:41:37

I agree fully with WoodLane7. Please act soon to make the cat "yours". Good luck!