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When did 'Passing' become the new word for died????

(169 Posts)
Franbern Thu 19-Sept-24 19:02:54

Just that really. Seems to be that no-one can say that someone has died, nowadays they have 'passed'. Okay, that might mean something if you are religious and still believe in life after death.#

To me, it is a rather silly term and is becoming increasingly annoying.

Crossstitchfan Fri 20-Sept-24 20:12:35

LisaP

Worlds first problems eh?
Does it really matter what term people use - surely its what they are comfortable saying.
My wife died in July and my daughter died in August so it is all very raw for me but I have had every term thrown at me in the last few months. I dont get bent out of shape over it. I may use whatever terminolgy depending on the audience.

It sounds trite when I say I am sorry, but I couldn’t ignore the fact that two of your loved ones died, especially so close together.
Lost, passed, whatever. I can understand why it doesn’t worry you whichever term is used. That doesn’t alter the fact that you have been dealt a dreadful blow and my heart goes out to you.

GranPepp Fri 20-Sept-24 19:59:42

Celieanne86

I hate this word passing also lost. I have not lost my husband he has died and I know exactly where he is, he’s in our local cemetery in a grave so he’s not lost to me. Why are people afraid to use the word dead, that’s final. Sorry but just my own opinion.

I agree. I used to work in a bank and they started saying this "x has passed" nonsense around 15 or 20 years ago. I have told my family to never say I have "passed" about me. Just say someone has died. This "passed" terminology came around early 2000s from USA. I find it aggravating

Ijustwantpeace2020 Fri 20-Sept-24 19:53:43

Check out George Carlin on YouTube. He was so right!

Mollygo Fri 20-Sept-24 19:51:00

I’m happy that my family use whatever words they choose to refer to me when I’m dead. I’d hate them to be upset by having their choice of words rubbished by others.

win Fri 20-Sept-24 19:36:34

It is not just the words we use, it is the way we react to death. People on here say is is too blunt to say death/died. If we talked about death to be as normal as birth is, it would not feel blunt it would feel normal albeit still sad. We need to talk to each other about our wishes, what is important to us and preferably long before it is obvious we are dying. It makes life so much easier all around and enables us to have a good death, which is so very important for us and indeed for our loved ones we leave behind. I will bet you anything that the people who cannot say death/died outright are the people who have not had these important conversations with their loved ones. Too many people can't talk about and don't want to know. How ridiculous is that. It is one thing in life which is certain, we die. I am forever going on about the importance to normalise death and am shocked that so many people cannot accept death as being normal and part of every day life. Of course it hurts to say good bye to a loved one for good, but if you have done everything in your power to enable them to have a good death, you will find it so much easier to talk about and actually say out loud from the first moment your loved one died and you notify people about their death.

grumppa Fri 20-Sept-24 19:22:47

Back in 1870, earth's proud empires passed away, according to the Rev. John Fullerton ("The day Thou gavest, Lord is ended").

Crossstitchfan Fri 20-Sept-24 19:20:29

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Notagrannysadly Fri 20-Sept-24 19:19:55

Love all these comments. So glad we have a sense of humour. Please, no 'passing' or 'passed'. Let's face it square on, we die eventually. End of. Why can't we face it? Goes to show how we have adopted so many Americanisms.

Crossstitchfan Fri 20-Sept-24 19:16:26

EEJit

I'm not so bothered about "Passed", but there is another one I've started seeing, "unalive" or "unalived" for died or killed", it really bugs me.

On the subject of death, I hate the phrase "over the rainbow bridge" when an animal dies or is dead. It sounds ridiculous.

Never heard those, but I agree with your dislike of them

Crossstitchfan Fri 20-Sept-24 19:14:15

Anniebach

Very Christian, ridiculing, mocking , criticising,

Something you NEVER do, of course!!!

Crossstitchfan Fri 20-Sept-24 19:13:03

Anniebach

No one has to say it

You’re at it again!

Elusivebutterfly Fri 20-Sept-24 19:05:50

Passed away has been used for a long time but it was around 11 or 12 years ago a colleague talked about someone who had passed. I was wondering what she was talking about - I was looking around for someone who had walked past us!
Why can't people just say died.

SilverFoxette75 Fri 20-Sept-24 18:57:30

Well I’ll take “passed away” over the newest one that seems to be popular amongst the younger generation, “UNALIVE”. That really winds me up when I see it!!

rosemary55 Fri 20-Sept-24 18:19:55

I always say my husband passed away, for some reason I can't say died out loud, still after 4 years its hard and he was only 66 and just retired, when these sort of comments come up I'm sure people don't think before they write sometimes ;(

Annma Fri 20-Sept-24 17:55:00

I think it is an Americanism.

watermeadow Fri 20-Sept-24 17:28:42

A funny euphemism came from someone too coy to say she was pregnant again, ‘We’re starting another family’
Why do so many daft words come from America?

Oreo Fri 20-Sept-24 16:57:24

Aveline

I don't like the phrase, 'Ive buried my mother/father/whatever.' Usually said in a sanctimonious voice. I can just imagine them standing by with a spade. Maybe it's just a Scots saying though?.

That made me laugh actually, never heard anyone say it but maybe it’s just a Scottish thing as you say.I imagined Billy Connelly saying it.😄

Aveline Fri 20-Sept-24 16:45:29

I don't like the phrase, 'Ive buried my mother/father/whatever.' Usually said in a sanctimonious voice. I can just imagine them standing by with a spade. Maybe it's just a Scots saying though?.

rascal Fri 20-Sept-24 16:45:20

I can't stand hearing passed away.
Very annoying!
A person has not passed away, they have died!

EEJit Fri 20-Sept-24 16:37:00

I'm not so bothered about "Passed", but there is another one I've started seeing, "unalive" or "unalived" for died or killed", it really bugs me.

On the subject of death, I hate the phrase "over the rainbow bridge" when an animal dies or is dead. It sounds ridiculous.

winterwhite Fri 20-Sept-24 16:04:07

The French use ‘left us’ in formal announcements which says it all neatly.

‘Sorry for your loss’ always sounds trite and unfeeling to me.

Anniebach Fri 20-Sept-24 15:29:57

The Bible also offers comfort for those who are mourning the loss of a loved one. Psalm 34:18 states: "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit."

Anniebach Fri 20-Sept-24 15:26:52

Very Christian, ridiculing, mocking , criticising,

Mirren Fri 20-Sept-24 15:24:08

I am a Christian and a doctor.
I absolutely hate this ridiculous term
We all DIE. It is the single unifying experience the human race has.
We are born , not arrive , so why need Pass ??
I know death is said to be " the last great taboo " and a sensitive subject but being twee about a normal occurrence only exacerbates the problem.
Please, call it it dying and died.

Smileless2012 Fri 20-Sept-24 15:21:42

I agree Shelflife what difference does it make what word someone uses.