When did 'Passing' become the new word for died????

Baggs
My approach is let people use the words that suit them but don't demand that others' diction "falls into line" so to speak. Each to their own.
I agree, and not just on this subject either. The demand that others only use the terminology chosen by someone else is wrong.

Baggs

I do not find that "cushioning" words or phrases help. I understand that others do. My approach is let people use the words that suit them but don't demand that others' diction "falls into line" so to speak. Each to their own.

Yes, this. I honestly don't mind what terms others choose to use. If it suits them or brings them some kind of comfort, so be it. I don't believe in a heaven or afterlife in any case. But if there was, then I hope it is a rainbow bridge and I'm greeted by the pets I've lost over the years.

Just about anything has to be better than the twee "gone to be with the angels" that I was fobbed off with decades ago when an obscure relative died.
I ask you!

I do not find that "cushioning" words or phrases help. I understand that others do. My approach is let people use the words that suit them but don't demand that others' diction "falls into line" so to speak. Each to their own.

Athrawes

I prefer 'died'. It's straightforward and it can be understood but I can understand the use of 'still birth' having gone through it twice - it's such an horrendous experience and it just takes a little bit of 'edge' off what has happened - for me it was that bit gentler than dead.

I am so sorry, I do hope bringing this up doesn't cause any extra sadness. Not having suffered anything like that myself, I will not pretend I can comprehend the grief of others who have.

I can fully understand that you need language to soften the reality when it happens, But a 'still' birth describes a baby who is just lying there, quite still, which is accurate, born sleeping is pretending things are other than they are.

It's said here, too.

In Botswana if some dies they are described as 'late' as in "my mother is late" - huge confusion the first time I heard it.

I prefer 'died'. It's straightforward and it can be understood but I can understand the use of 'still birth' having gone through it twice - it's such an horrendous experience and it just takes a little bit of 'edge' off what has happened - for me it was that bit gentler than dead.

There is another phrase I fully understand, but dislike, it is describing a baby who is born dead, as 'born sleeping'. Of course the previous description of a 'still birth' is also a euphmism, so I am not sure what the best way to describe such a tragic event is, but perhaps stick to the euphemism we already have, rather than developing another.

The first few times I heard the recent euphemism, I was very confused and assumed the baby had been born alive but very drowsy.

Crossstichfan you were being very personal in your criticism and that is probably why your post was deleted. What you said was not in any way “nice”

On my local F—ebook page there are often posts about missing cats, sometimes followed by one about a ‘deceased’ cat having been found.

Crossstitchfan

EEJit

I'm not so bothered about "Passed", but there is another one I've started seeing, "unalive" or "unalived" for died or killed", it really bugs me.

On the subject of death, I hate the phrase "over the rainbow bridge" when an animal dies or is dead. It sounds ridiculous.

Never heard those, but I agree with your dislike of them

I think ‘unalived’ comes from TikTok or other social media, where the conspiracy theorists’ posts using ‘dead’ or ‘killed’ were automatically deleted.

Just to add, I have no idea what your comment was but being personal is the usual reason for deleting.

That would be that you were being personal so had a comment deleted.We can all say what we think on a subject.I only report if posters cross a line.

I have just had a message removed by GN because I criticised a poster for always being critical of people and always putting them down. (You know who you are!) Sometimes I wonder who these GN monitors are!
I thought we were meant to be nice, yet when I pulled someone up on their constant criticism and put-downs,t was deleted. I give up! I expect this will be deleted too! Oh well!!

Good point Caleo 😃

Many people most people nowadays have never prepared a dead body for burial or even seen a dead body. ''Died' is therefore scary as it's associated with physical signs like changes in skin colour, rigor mortis, and decomposition.

When people substitute 'passed' they are being polite and referencing sadness and loss not corpses.

I remember it being said when my grandmother died 50 years ago. When I queried it was told its the passing from one world to another, my family were not religious.

M0nica

I have threatened to come back and haunt any member of my family, who uses 'passed away' or 'passed' when describing my eventual death.

Kicked the bucket and similar terms will be acceptable but nothing shmaltzy, euphemistic, or sentimental is permissable.

When I die, I will be dead.

My father threatened to come and haunt anyone who wasted money on flowers for his funeral.
In the hope that he would, my mother put a small bunch on the coffin.
Needless to say, she was disappointed.

MissAdventure

the verb “pass” passed into English in the early 13th century by way of England’s Norman rulers.

The English verb has been used in reference to dying since around the year 1230, according to the Oxford English Dictionary.

Many of the early published references cited in the OED use it in the verbal phrases “pass to God” or “pass to heaven.” The verbal phrase “pass away,” which is more common today, dates from the 14th century.

The word “pass” has been used by itself since around 1340 as a verb meaning to die. The OED cites published references in Chaucer, Shakespeare, Tennyson, and many other writers.

Here’s an example from King Lear (1608): “Vex not his ghost, / O let him passe.”

Thanks for this, l get peeved by folk claiming certain words originated in America when they clearly do not.
I remember "passed away" being used in my childhood so nothing new.

I wish I could say that my husband passed away. It sounds a lovely, peaceful way to go. I can't even bring myself to say he died. He was killed. By an idiot lorry driver. I'd far prefer to be able to say he passed away. But whatever term you choose to use, the end result is the same.

Mollygo

I’m happy that my family use whatever words they choose to refer to me when I’m dead. I’d hate them to be upset by having their choice of words rubbished by others.

Ain’t that the truth!
Allow people to say what they like when a loved one dies.Passed away is a gentler form of referring to death and if it helps the bereaved then that’s all to the good.

the verb “pass” passed into English in the early 13th century by way of England’s Norman rulers.

The English verb has been used in reference to dying since around the year 1230, according to the Oxford English Dictionary.

Many of the early published references cited in the OED use it in the verbal phrases “pass to God” or “pass to heaven.” The verbal phrase “pass away,” which is more common today, dates from the 14th century.

The word “pass” has been used by itself since around 1340 as a verb meaning to die. The OED cites published references in Chaucer, Shakespeare, Tennyson, and many other writers.

Here’s an example from King Lear (1608): “Vex not his ghost, / O let him passe.”

Well timed. Went to the funeral of a lifetime friend today, someone I loved like a sister. Her DH at 79 is obviously in bits.
Nobody was crass enough to refer to my friend as dead, though we know that she is, people referred to her as having passed away, because when people have just lost a loved one they don't need to have their noses rubbed in it. A little tact is what is called for. And if others don't care for this then I suggest they just don't use the term themselves.
Hardly the end of the world.

please think of people who are grieving, wracked by grief perhaps;
some of these comments could be quite upsetting.
this subject is in a different category than the usual SPAG/English usage/Pedants' Corner
type of discussions.