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He's 'Looking Down on You'

(114 Posts)
GrandmaKT Thu 19-Sept-24 21:58:12

The current thread on the use of the word 'passing' (for died) has made me think of a term I hear a lot.
So many times I hear people say "I know my dad/mum will be looking down on me and they will be so proud" etc..
Honest question, does anyone actually believe this? If so, do you believe that relatives who have died are watching you all the time, or at key moments only? I always wonder!

harrigran Sat 21-Sept-24 12:30:13

I don't believe in relatives looking down on me.
I dream about DH almost every night and I am reassured that he is still there in my memory.
My parents have been dead almost 40 years and I think I have only dreamt about them twice.

suelld Sat 21-Sept-24 12:23:42

One of those legacies from ‘Sunday School’ and a brief schooling at a RC school …with Nuns…very theatrical!
No don’t believe it but it lingers…I jolt myself out of it by thinking ….wherever They are up there or down there…it must be VERY**** Crowded by now!!😏

MissAdventure Sat 21-Sept-24 12:14:41

Yes, that is a scientific fact. smile

BrandyGran Sat 21-Sept-24 12:12:29

If I’m feeling sad I sometimes pat my own hand gently as my mother used to do. It really helps.I don’t believe we will see our loved ones in Heaven. I do believe that our bodies will go back into the earth- it says in the bible”ashes to ashes and dust to dust” and that is where our energy goes too in creating new life in nature. As another poster said “ energy cannot be created or destroyed “. Very deep thinking this am !!!!

fluttERBY123 Sat 21-Sept-24 12:06:59

More things are wrought in heaven and earth than this world dreams of, as the bard said. Still true even with all tech etc nowadays. Beam me up, Scottie, can't be far off. Like Pandapatch I think everything is connected, even the past and the present and the future.

Marmight Sat 21-Sept-24 11:53:03

After my husband died I found solace in a robin which constantly visited the garden. I was told that the dead reappear as a Robin to keep an eye on you. Of course, I didn’t for one minute believe it but it was comforting at the time and when in deep grief you’d hang on to anything and I chatted to the bird as I would have to DH.
My Mum was convinced in the after life and that gave her comfort as she aged.
I’d love to feel my DH was watching over me but having scattered his ashes here there and everywhere there’s no way he’s anywhere peeking at me. Of course, he’s evident in our daughters and our grandchildren and I often see his characteristics and looks in each and every one of them.

Harris27 Sat 21-Sept-24 11:44:40

Interesting thread. What about robins? A friend of mine always says if you see a robin it’s a close relative nearby. Comforts her.

MissAdventure Sat 21-Sept-24 11:44:08

What do the spirits of the dead people do when they're not looking down on us, though?

I'd need an explanation that would at least partly made sense.

That can't be all they do!

lovesreading Sat 21-Sept-24 11:36:08

When my mum died my sister in Australia knew before I told her because the candle by her photo went out. For me though it's utter tosh, however, I'd never try and convince anyone of that, because how could I? It could be that I'll be proved wrong which would be quite nice actually.
Memories are very strong however, good or bad, and so those strong feelings some people get; who's to say they aren't real?
We have white feathers in our garden all the time and on our dog walks. I know this because my Westie barks wildly and then, if I'm not quick off the mark, eats them! shock They are known as the 'evil feathers' in our family.

PilgrimQuill Sat 21-Sept-24 11:27:23

The reality is that those who want an afterlife can have it - this is the message in the bible. There are a lot of myths about this because we can't understand how time is linear for us while we are alive but is not afterwards. Our loved ones are in this other time so are not watching over us in our time. But love itself never dies and stays with us and that is the comfort for us.
As for a deity or supreme being watching you like a big brother, try him as a friend to walk beside and there is comfort there too. This is the other main message in the scriptures.
A friend of mine believes a white feather has dropped from an angelic wing - whether it is or not is irrelevant - the reality is that angels are always close to us.

Daffydilly Sat 21-Sept-24 11:26:09

I firmly believe that when you're dead, you're dead.

When Mum died it was my greatest loss. I don't believe she's at the cemetery where she's buried, not is she 'watching over me'.

She's in my mind and my heart and therefore I carry her with me.

I often ask myself, "What would Mum do?" or think, "Mum would love this" and it keeps her memory alive.

Moggycuddler Sat 21-Sept-24 11:19:25

They aren't watching. But I believe in some way we carry the love and the sense of comfort that our loved ones gave us with us after they are gone. That's what I feel about my parents.

polnan Sat 21-Sept-24 11:18:20

I go along with Dadda`s priest,, my mum has been dead , many years now, I have often felt ... can`t describe,, not her watching over me,, some guidance, in a smallish way, by human standards..I have often felt her "close" to me , many times.

Nannapat1 Sat 21-Sept-24 11:14:15

I agree with those who don't believe that anyone who has died is 'looking down' but if it brings comfort to those who are bereaved, let them believe it.

meddijess Sat 21-Sept-24 11:07:29

Rekaric: A white feather is supposed to be from a gull. Some believe that they are spirits of the dead, so if you have a white feather in your drive, could be a sign that a loved one is watching over you. Or it could be a passing gull dropped a feather!

GrandmaKT Sat 21-Sept-24 08:58:30

keepingquiet

I don't think it needs the idea of being 'looked at' or white feathers or any other physical sign to be aware of the presence of loved ones. I think the title of the thread is a bit unfortunate.

I'm sorry if the title of the thread upset anyone, but I hear that exact phrase so often. Many times it is said with such sincerity that I genuinely wondered if people really believed it.

Georgesgran Fri 20-Sept-24 14:57:22

Like Maw.
We also see those dead loved ones in our family through genetics.
Love a robin, but they’re just fun little birds, not a visitor from another realm.

keepingquiet Fri 20-Sept-24 14:36:24

I don't think it needs the idea of being 'looked at' or white feathers or any other physical sign to be aware of the presence of loved ones. I think the title of the thread is a bit unfortunate.

AGAA4 Fri 20-Sept-24 14:24:09

I don't believe my relatives are looking down from heaven. I know that those I've loved and who loved me are forever in my mind and will stay there.

MissInterpreted Fri 20-Sept-24 14:04:16

As much as I'd like to believe in some form of afterlife, I don't. I certainly don't think there's anyone 'looking down on me' like some kind of guardian angel or something. I think when you're dead, you're dead and that's it. If others want to believe and it gives them some kind of comfort, fine - I'm not knocking it. if there was any kind of afterlife, I'd like to be greeted by the dogs I've lost over the years. That would do me just fine.

Elegran Fri 20-Sept-24 14:03:56

crazyH

I saw a white feather on my drive - I didn’t pick it up or think much of it. But where did it come from? I haven’t seen many white birds about 😂

Quite a lot of birds have white under-feathers, whatever the colour of their top clothes is.

RosesandLilac Fri 20-Sept-24 13:58:52

As a non believer I sincerely hope my mother isn’t looking down on me; I did little right in her eyes when she was alive, I definitely don’t need ongoing disapproval and disappointment from her for the rest of mine!

Cabbie21 Fri 20-Sept-24 13:12:17

I don’t know how my DH would feel if he is watching me. i have had to get rid of so much of his stuff, things he loved, things he hoarded, things he wouldn’t get rid of ‘ just in case’.

AreWeThereYet Fri 20-Sept-24 13:07:03

I hope my DF isn't watching me at the moment, he would be very disappointed in me.

No, I don't believe anyone is 'looking down' at us.

I do believe it's possible to feel the presence of a loved one long after they are gone. MrA is looking over my shoulder having a nag even when he's on the other side of the world, and I suspect he always will be.

Oreo Fri 20-Sept-24 12:50:50

Well, we can’t know can we? Either way.I dismiss robins hopping about and floating white feathers of course, that’s just the natural world.