Speak to strangers.

I listen to a long podcast to fall asleep each night
I enjoyed this one hiddenbrain.org/podcast/you-2-0-the-gift-of-other-people/

Daitch56, you might like to have a listen. 🤗

When you travel alone (as I have mostly done) you have to talk to strangers if you want information, directions and so on. I dont go out much now but I am happy to chat to the postman, delivery person, etc. I know that they have a job to do so they wont be staying and taking up my time. So its no sacrifice to thank them for delivering my package and wishing them a good day.

When I say that I "keep myself to myself" it dont want to get involved with neighbours or sales people who may waste my time. When you are self employed time is money. They can go and talk to all the lonely people of whom I am not one.

I’m lucky enough to live in a village with active coffee morning groups. It’s mostly older women who go and we chat and joke then go home. Recently a man came to one of the meetings, he didn’t say much but people chatted to him and he came regularly. He told me on Tuesday that before joining our group he hadn’t spoke to any one for 6 months. He’s gained confidence and now goes to coffee mornings and a men’s club on Thursday. My point is just talking to someone can give them the confidence to join groups and meet people.

As well as chatting to strangers I always give people who pass me on the street a smile often I get one back sometimes people look at me as if I m a nutter
Yesterday I passed a young Asian lad about 12 walking to school I gave him a smile and he nodded a little bow with his head to me, I hope he felt noticed I often see him walking alone
We never know what a smile or a simple chat can mean to someone

I enjoy a good natter. I don't need their life story but just general chit chat is a pleasant way to pass the time.

Truffle43

I love chatting with people when I am out and about. There are lots of interesting and chatty people out there. Last year a new craft group started locally and I thought I would join. Eek the people were so clicky I felt really uncomfortable needless to say I never went back and joined a different group where I was made to feel really welcome. My son in law was horrified that I spoke to people on my train journeys, he said he couldn’t think of anything worse as that was his time and he would not want anyone to chat with him. Maybe it’s because he is from a big city and I grew up in a small town where most of us knew each other. I will carry on chatting especially when walking the dog.

Yes, I agree with you re the local craft group. If people don't make the effort to talk even about something as simple as the the weather, you don't connect. I don't want to know the secrets of their soul, but a nice 'Lovely to see the sun again', said with a smile, connects. I've done a bit of an observation on this and noticed that some people just don't have anything to say for themselves. Then they moan when people don't include them etc.

I love chatting with people when I am out and about. There are lots of interesting and chatty people out there. Last year a new craft group started locally and I thought I would join. Eek the people were so clicky I felt really uncomfortable needless to say I never went back and joined a different group where I was made to feel really welcome. My son in law was horrified that I spoke to people on my train journeys, he said he couldn’t think of anything worse as that was his time and he would not want anyone to chat with him. Maybe it’s because he is from a big city and I grew up in a small town where most of us knew each other. I will carry on chatting especially when walking the dog.

The odd time my DD and I go shopping she usually says and don't be talking to random strangers Mum. Who me talk to random strangers never 😂. I'll say hello to everyone and that includes 'random' cats and dogs. Just have to be a little careful of course but that could also apply to people. I do find though that it's more likely the older people who chat back. I suppose we were just brought up not so wary as the youngsters nowadays. So just keeeep chatting 😁 😉

Apart from a shop assistant, you could be the only person someone speaks to all day.

You never know, you could find a new best friend!

Fleurpepper

Still do, only right, no?

Sadly I think it would be viewed with great suspicion where I live.. he did it with total strangers.. Do you live in France, or the countryside...it might be different there

Still do, only right, no?

paddyann54

It’s the norm to strike up conversations here,you often get someone’s life story waiting in a queue.I,d hate to live somewhere that people didn’t speak to each other ,I,ve been known to ask directions and the person will say I,ll walk with you so you find it.Or when we,ve been in the car and stopped to ask they,ll offer to jump in a d take us there.Nothing better than friendly folk

I can remember that same friendliness as a child, and also that my father would always stop his car in the street if we passed someone with shopping or elderly, and offer them a lift. He thought nothing of going out of his way.. we lived in a smallish village..

It’s the norm to strike up conversations here,you often get someone’s life story waiting in a queue.I,d hate to live somewhere that people didn’t speak to each other ,I,ve been known to ask directions and the person will say I,ll walk with you so you find it.Or when we,ve been in the car and stopped to ask they,ll offer to jump in a d take us there.Nothing better than friendly folk

At one office I worked in I used to arrive very early and there were just a few people around. i used to walk past one man sat at his desk every day who never looked up or acknowledged me in any way. I started saying good morning every day and never had a response for around 6 mths. it got to be a bit of a personal battle for me. One day I'd had a really bad drive in, was a bit upset and walked past him without speaking he shouted good morning after me. For a split second I thought shall I ignore him for a change but turned round said good morning and said sorry i'd had a rotten drive and my mind was elsewhere. After that he started speaking to me every morning.

gulligranny

I had one of the most life-enhancing encounters on a late-night Tube train; travelling home with DH the train was quite full and there was a group of 3 or 4 twenty-something young men fooling about, smoking (eek - on the Tube!!) and drinking from cans of lager.

I caught the eye of one who rather threateningly said "I know what you're thinking, I'm a **". I said that actually I was thinking what I'd give for a swig of that beer, which totally took the wind out of his sails. He offered me the can and I did indeed take a lovely long swig. Bless him, he then asked if I'd like a drag of his wacky-baccy cigarette, but I declined! We got into a conversation about football (both Spurs supporters) then he turned to DH and asked "She your wife?" DH confirmed that indeed I was, and the young man told him he was a lucky old so-and-so and if he (the young man) was a bit older, he'd marry me! He then asked if he could kiss me; I thought I'd better agree, and he gave me the sweetest kiss on the forehead and told me that he wished all old women were like me (!). I told him that I wished all young men were like him, and that I hoped he'd have a long and happy life, just before the train reached his stop.

I've never forgotten that sweet kiss ...

what a difference it can make when we really try to communicate with people with acceptance and love..

gulligranny, there's lovely story !

I had one of the most life-enhancing encounters on a late-night Tube train; travelling home with DH the train was quite full and there was a group of 3 or 4 twenty-something young men fooling about, smoking (eek - on the Tube!!) and drinking from cans of lager.

I caught the eye of one who rather threateningly said "I know what you're thinking, I'm a **". I said that actually I was thinking what I'd give for a swig of that beer, which totally took the wind out of his sails. He offered me the can and I did indeed take a lovely long swig. Bless him, he then asked if I'd like a drag of his wacky-baccy cigarette, but I declined! We got into a conversation about football (both Spurs supporters) then he turned to DH and asked "She your wife?" DH confirmed that indeed I was, and the young man told him he was a lucky old so-and-so and if he (the young man) was a bit older, he'd marry me! He then asked if he could kiss me; I thought I'd better agree, and he gave me the sweetest kiss on the forehead and told me that he wished all old women were like me (!). I told him that I wished all young men were like him, and that I hoped he'd have a long and happy life, just before the train reached his stop.

I've never forgotten that sweet kiss ...

I think it depends where you live. In the last town we lived in nobody ever spoke to anybody they didn't know, if you tried to initiate any conversations you were glared at. We moved to a small town only 12 miles away and it's unusual not to get into a conversation with a stranger if you go to the local shop, into town or to the cinema. We couldn't believe what a difference those 12 miles make.

Yup! Just like my dear Mum I speak to “strangers” However, no one can beat one our dearest friends, he literally speaks to anyone and everyone wherever we go, we tease him relentlessly and when we go out with his wife as two couples we often “lose” him as he’s wandered off for a chat with someone

It might have been Michael Mosley in his Just One Thing series that expressed the importance of communicating with people for both parties

I like chatting to those I meet. Had a nice chat on bus recently to a lady from a nearby town.
When I was a young mum I hated being without adult company all day at home. I would go shopping just to speak to someone. Was shocking the number of sales assistants who make no eye contact, say nothing, just take your payment. So rude and unfriendly. Not a place to revisit.
I joined the WI two years ago. Enjoy the meetings and get to know everyone over time. Interesting visitors doing talks on a variety of subjects. Best one was granddaughter of a lady who started a ballroom dancing school during WW2. Became really famous and had her dancers on Come Dancing competing. Had photos from that tv show, Cilla's Surprise Surprise, Generation Game Show with Brucie I think. Plus lots of photos of people sleeping in underground stations using them as bomb shelters during the war. Other war damage pics too. Fascinating.
Had thought it would be boring! Was lovely seeing all the pics. Especially a young pretty Wogan, Cilla and Bruce Forsyth. Dance costumes were fabulous.
Worst talk subject, to my mind, was a talk on book binding in a London publishers. With extremely heavy books passed around!
Every WI group is different and we can visit their evenings too. One does Fashion Shows with the clothes seen available to buy with others on rails at vastly discounted prices.
Another fun evening was a group of musicians playing and singing songs at Christmas. Magical .

ginny yes I suppose one could “don” dark glasses, face mask and a full headset. They would get the message that you don’t want to talk😅

DeeAitch56

I just wish I could strike up a conversation, I’ve suffered with crippling shyness all my life to the extent I even find it difficult to start a conversation with family and friends that I’ve know for donkey’s years

That must be horrible for you, and it's such a shame, too, because many people would be only to happy to chat.

Can you smile at strangers?

I'm a real chatterbox, and will speak to anybody! In my part of the Country (the North West) we are quite friendly, and most of us think nothing of chatting to people in queues or people sitting next to us or when we are out on dog walks. Even just passing someone on a quiet street we will smile and nod at each other. It's easy to tell if someone doesn't want to engage, no offence is taken and you just leave them to it.

It must be an (older person thing) at least over 45 ish…
Or under 5s

Inbetween those groups people become increasingly suspicious. * Some* children (not all) react in bewilderment if you speak to them …like you were from another planet 👽
…and it kind of reaches a peak of being embarrassed around age 12/15 ish if say, your Mum talks to teachers at a parents evening and “mum” is almost expected to walk 10 paces behind - just in case adolescent in question is spotted by one of their friends🤣

The under 5s I see on the other side of the counter are “full of it” and chat away unabashed even when they’re about to have meltdown after being refused a toy!
They’ll tell you everything.
And the babies riding in the trolleys give a sort of royal wave to their fans as they sail past the tills on the way out! …so joyous.