“Feeling Lonely? Let’s Chat and Support Each Other”

Devine05
You are very welcome.
You don’t have to do anything to be part of this group. You can chat sit on the sidelines and watch the conversations or tell us what you’re growing, is it food flowers trees ? What about what you’re cooking as I bet it’s all delicious.

Devine05

Have just discovered this thread and am hastening to join - if you'll have me?!

Am lonely in that I live outside the U.K. I live in the sticks, 30km out from a European cultural capital but with lousy public transport and no cultural clubs or voluntary associations I could join. Being nearly 80, am cautious at the wheel so do not travel far from home.

It's just my husband and I at home. By Murphy's Law, the daughter we are very close to is married to an Engishman and lives there while the daughter who doesn't want to know us - and the mother of my three adorable grandchildren - lives within 20 minutes drive but no longer brings the children to us (a very long, old story behind this which we both thought was over but has re-emerged).

My friends and relatives in England live in cultural cities like London and Cambridge and tell me of their visits to art galleries, museums, theatres etc., and then ask me how I pass my time. This mortifies me as my life is so stilted in comparison. - I read constantly; I garden but in this country gardening is an occupation left to gardeners - women are not often seen with their hands buried in earth! Am considered "strange" for this. I cook from scratch - here it is easy to find zero kilometre foodstuffs of all kinds - and am careful to eat quality rather than quantity (but still have to fight the extra kilos!).

What can I contribute to this thread? Nothing much other than understanding of others' problems and hints on Italian cuisine.

I wanted to say this is a helpful thread for anybody by themselves. Good thing to have support on here

Polnan
💐
The sun is shining brightly this morning. Have a good day everyone. 🌞

fiorentina51 hugs... my husband died just before Covid was announced,, I think with the lockdowns I didn`t get my "grieving" in, dunno really, but yesterday I had a day as you say, suddenly.... yes, my best friend.. I don`t make friends easily, and don`t like too many people around, like crowds,I get out with a couple of friends, one with a husband, one without, but just company, no disrespect to them, but not ?? someone to really talk with.
this morning I woke,, thinking, "I am not alone, I am not lonely" but then I have my faith, weak as it is...
For me, it is good to share here with you all, we are all different, but at the same time, it helps me to hear that I truly am not alone, we share here and that so helps me.. so thank you all.

Ferry23 Welcome you are not alone. There are lots of people feeling the same I hope this thread helps you in some sort of way. It has been a long gloomy winter but it is changing. Soon we will have sunshine and warmth and I cannot wait. Have you heard of Age Uk befriending service. They have volunteers who can chat with you regularly on the telephone or people who pop in and have a cuppa with you. It might be worth looking on their website. It is only a suggestion and I fully understand if it is not something you would consider. Today I may even get out of my bed early and take a walk on the beach. Tide will be out and I can collect litter on my circular walk. Minds made up I am off to litter pick. Have a good day everyone.

Polnan
I agree with your comment.
I was widowed almost 3 years ago. I keep busy, have a wide circle of friends and a loving supportive family, but there are times when the awful loneliness sweeps over me and I realise I've not seen or spoken to anyone for days.

My husband was my best friend. We enjoyed each others company and we enjoyed doing our own thing too.
His sudden death was such a shock.

What a nice thread!
Today I shall be joining two other "women of a certain age" working on a local smallholding tucked away in the Wyre Forest.
We tend to spend an awful lot of time drinking coffee and eating cake but we also help with tasks on the farm and in the forest.
I call it my therapy session.
I've helped to plant trees, (seventy six at the last count.) I've learnt how to prune apple trees, rounded up sheep, collected rattle seeds from the meadows, cleaned bird boxes and done reptile surveys.
I love this time of year. The forest is waking up again.
Not sure what I'll be doing today, but I'm sure coffee and cake will be involved. 🙂

Ferry23 even seeing people doesnt stop the lonely feelings. Hope you can feel better coming here? it helps to know you are not alone..

I'm taking the plunge here as yes, as it says in the title, I am feeling lonely.

I went to the Doctor's this morning and realised it was the first time I'd spoken to a real person face to face since my cleaning lady came last Wednesday.

And the first time I'd actually been out for 10 days - and that was ...to the Doctor!

Just popped in here to see if there was anyone else who is feeling so isolated right now. I suppose it's an age thing plus living alone plus what seems to be a long and gloomy winter.

Taichinan
Don’t let the time of the last post fool you. I had problems sleeping so got up and went back to bed about 5 minutes after posting the message.
I walked on the beach again and although it was cold I felt great when I got back. Enjoy sitting by the pond .

I see you're an early riser Truffle! Something which I am definitely not. I have a pretty boring day ahead - all sorts of household tasks which refuse to be ignored any longer. But if the sun and breeze permit I shall factor in a little time to sit by the pond and watch the fish - for some reason I always find that therapeutic. Enjoy your day - and your beetroot chocolate cake 😉

Taichinan
Thai-chi on the beach sounds amazing. Hearing the waves while completing the gentle moves must feel so calming. I feel good just visualising it.
We also walked on the beach yesterday I completed my usual litter pick.I do find this therapeutic and wonder if others feel the same. I then came home and made a beetroot chocolate cake it was yummy. Probably undid all the good I achieved by my walking but it was so good I didn’t care. Enjoy your Monday everyone. Whoops forgot to say that I didn’t eat all of the cake.🤣

Your walks do sound lovely Truffle. Those little lambs! And a lark - there's something so beautiful about the lark's song. Your little dog sounds great company.
Yesterday was a glorious day here - Spring at its best. We did tai chi down on the sandy beach to the sound of the sea and it was wonderful to fill our lungs with that beautiful fresh clean air. We had put on layers of clothing topped by woollie hats and gloves after the past freezing week, but the warmth from the sun and the fact that the wind had dropped and the breeze was coming off the land meant that a pile of discarded outer clothing soon grew beside us! We do this outdoor tai chi once a month on a Saturday morning when the tide is right, and never mind the weather! We've done it in all sorts!
When I came home I was able to sit in the garden by the pond and watch the fish meandering in and out - they enjoy the still, sunny days too.
Have a lovely day today people, whatever you're doing x

Indiebee
Isn’t nature fantastic? No matter how you feel how old or young you are getting outdoors is so good for you. Seeing animals in the fields makes you feel good you always have to stop and look. I get such joy from simple things and often find myself singing oh what a perfect day as I’m walking along. People must think I am nuts but who cares, the people that matter know I’m crazy.

Truffle43 - very pleased to hear about your rescue dog and the lambs. I have just seen glossy black cows on my walk - unusual as it's usually sheep here in our Sussex marshes. Looked them up but there are many black breeds I discover.
Ltp1404 - I see you are in the south too, but its a long coastline...

Indiebee I do enjoy my walks with my little dog she is a small breed and is a rescue dog from the uk. Poor mite had been used for breeding and an animal rescue team rescued about 15 little dogs that day. They brought this little greasy smelly creature to me and that was it my heart melted. She is now a naughty mischievous funny little thing with a lovable personality and adorable. She is well loved. I try to vary our walks and it does depend on how I am feeling as I have balance issues. Her favourite is when we go to feed the piggies as I feed them carrots and my little dog loves carrots one for piggy 2 for her.🤣

Truffle43 - your walks sound lovely. Do you go with your little dog? Tell us about him/her?

I went to our Nature Reserve today for a walk. It's by the sea and has shingle areas, salt marshes, pools and grasslands. My son is staying with me and we saw a lark rising up from the grass singing, a curlew wading in a pool and lots of sea birds flying.

Henetha - you sound like an amazing gardener. How are your plants?!

I got so excited while out for a walk as there are lambs in a field. I was enjoying the nice weather hearing the birds with hearing aids in and seeing plants springing to life when I noticed the lambs . Honestly I felt so happy as spring is round the corner.

Taichinan
I can hear a fair bit most of the time but not then obviously. Never mind if that’s the worst thing I do this week it’s not bad.
Weather here has been good and I am trying my best to find out where a gorgeous smelling plant is coming from. I walk past some houses with walled gardens and on walking past one of them the perfume is amazing. I can see several overgrown shrubs and think it is amongst them. I guess I may never know but will keep my eyes open .

Oh dear Truffle! But didn't you do well having 'polite conversation' without your aids. I'm totally lost without mine. In fact if anyone comes to the door when I'm not wearing mine I find myself mouthing and signing that I don't have my hearing aids in - when in fact the other person can hear and has no need for the demonstration 😂.
I hope everyone is enjoying this glorious weather.

Soooo embarrassing
I bought some used toys from a person and needed to collect them on Friday. Off I went the gentleman opened the door and me not wearing hearing aids thought he said Helen is upstairs. I could see a toy on the table but not what I was collecting and thought Helen was sorting mine out. I stood making idle chit chat for what felt like forever when hubby phoned wondering where I was,I explained I was waiting for Helen, the gentleman looked at me then said Helen’s not here the toys are behind you. Ohh my goodness I was mortified apologised profusely paid up and made a hasty exit after telling him I wasn’t some random mad woman I just didn’t have my hearing aids in . I’m still chuckling now. 🤣

Welcome Ltp1404
It is nice to have you join us. We do hope this thread is good for you.

Good morning indiebee and thanks for the warm welcome 😊. Another fine day here down South according to the weather report. My grass badly needs its first cut but will have to wait till the weekend as I think that may be nice too!

I hope you all have a good day.

Welcome Ltp1404 ! PPs are posting about about anything we are doing and are always trying to cheer each other on and up. It’s a happy sharing which I certainly value. I think all of us feel lonely or alone some of the time and there are many different ways of experiencing this. Sometimes it’s fine and sometimes not. Hope you are ok.