Self help books.

Friends are the best self helpers and I have a counsellor friend who is wonderful. I need help when anxiety is paramount & it usually is my daughter who I bounce to as she suffers with it too… it’s a curse the big A!! Although it’s better since I’m older, thank heavens!! 🙂

I enjoy reading self-help books. I read them less now that I am older but they have helped me at different stages in my life. Both my parents died when I was still in my 20s. I have no siblings. I was suddenly responsible for taking care of my husband our two small children and my grandmother whom I inherited from my parents as she lived with them. She was 80 when she came to live with us and she stayed for 12 years and then moved to Ireland to live with her daughter. I had become ill and was helping to run 3 family businesses, deal with 2 teenagers and whichever of their friends who needed to stay over plus Granny and two dogs. We had a very busy household and I was glad to read self-help books that might offer a glimmer of hope as to how I might do things better. I found Louis L Hay very good for psychological issues.
Flylady.com for keep the house running in a vaguely civilised way.
I spent three years training to be a counsellor when I was in my fifties and all of the books that were required reading on my course were really useful for understanding how human behaviour impacts on self and others. I am now in my late 70s and expect to retire at the end of this month from counselling (which I have loved). I am involved in friendship groups for older people now and I love that too. I enjoy learning new things and people are endlessly fascinating. My biggest problem is retaining knowledge now. Not in my work but in silly everyday things like forgetting a word which I know I will remember if I just relax and wait for it to come back to me. But self - help books can keep offering useful bits of knowledge throughout our whole lives if we can be humble enough to accept that we are all in a state of becoming and we are never the finished article.

Instead of self help books I come on here,and get lots of advice, chat , empathy…great!

My son once told me that a a prospective girlfriend with a shelf full of self help books was a major turn off, but I have read The Power of Positive Thinking, How to Win Friends and Influence People, but take them all with a pinch of salt.

Some self help books are helpful if you are struggling on your own with issues such as mental health , bereavement, relationship breakdown etc ,and have no one to talk to that you trust. IMHO The ones to avoid are the ones that purport to offer a way to perfection.

‘Who moved my cheese’ was a recommended read when I was working. Found it helpful.

Erm... weirdos, probably.
I'm going to look it up though.

MissAdventure

That title sounds interesting..

Ohhhh! Yes that does sound interesting or are we a couple of weirdo's Miss Adventure??? 😚

Not sure if this counts as a self help book but I found the book ‘ ‘The Way Out’ by Alan Gordon life changing (the audible version even better).
I’d had chronic pain for nearly a year and it was getting worse - my chiropractor told me it was my brain causing the pain which I thought was utter nonsense but after using the techniques described in the book the pain subsided in a couple of weeks and was gone after a month.

I read 'Your Erroneous Zones" by Wayne Dyer years ago and liked it a lot, I wasn't interested in his later work. I also liked 'Calm Down' by Paul Hauck.

Jeanathome

" short chunks" sounds good !

Phillipa Perry seems to make sense.

Philippa Perry's books are in my local library, I think she's very clear and kind with it.

" short chunks" sounds good !

Phillipa Perry seems to make sense.

I have often listened to the School of Life videos on YouTube, there are books and articles on the website. They are short chunks on a variety of subjects around mental health, relationships, trauma and 'life'!

I also tend to read thoughtful books which contain self help in a conversational sort of way - Matt Haig's books are interesting, also Oliver Burkeman, Four Thousand Weeks: Time and how to use it. Simon Parks, The Journey Home.

I also listen to All in the Mind on the BBC and there's a podcast on ABC, the Australian broadcaster with the same name. If you listen to podcasts, there are lots, people seem to like Ferne Cotton (not for me!).

Depends what you want really, is it lists of actions you can take (CBT-like) or work that is therapy based. I've just remembered Philippa Perry, the Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read and The Book You Want Everyone You Love to Read.

Happy reading!!

too common

From experience the first step is working out What the area of life the individual wants help with as there are some very good Self Help/ Motivational books out there.

Then there are some that deflate the reader so choosing what books work for you is a healthy first step.

The Web is a bonus as it allows us to search and search before we embark on the expense of buying anything.

Also when we know what area of Self Help we are looking for we can choose if it's an ebook, a pod cast, audio or old fashioned book :-)

Once you've chosen the area of life/type of self help books don't be put off if "that" book or Author doesn't work for you, find another book/Author.

Second had books are a good place to start until you find your own preference.

For example

Stoker 48 is listening to "The Chimp Paradox" one of my friends found it really valuable and another friend found it difficult and couldn't understand what all the fuss was about :-).

I wished it had been written while I was taking my qualifications as it would have cut down on the number of text books I had to plough through to make some of the points made in the book.

So "Self Help Books " a mixed bag, good if they fit your needs and a waste of time and money if they aren't working for you.

Good Luck and may you find what you are looking for and may it help you :-)

I divide Self Help books into broad catagories:-

Text books that you study by yourself to prepare for exams.

Books you read for interest to expand your general knowledge.

Books you read to find out about something specific you need to know in life.

Bossy books that set out to tell you how to live your life eg.
How to maximise your time so that you can bring up six children, have an immaculate house, cook wonderful meals,
keep your husband happy and still have time to write a PHD thesis. (I made that up but such books are all to common)

I am sure there are other categories.

That title sounds interesting..

I’m listening to The Chimp
Paradox on YouTube right now!

Yes, I've read Dorothy Rowe, Alice Miller, Deepak Chopra, Fritjof Capra, Gill Edwards and on and on. I have found them fascinating, uplifting, useful and rewarding.

Might try Dorothy Rowe, she talks some sense.

I like Loretta Bruening too.

Depends on one's definition of a self-help book. I have read a lot of research studies on ADHD and dyspraxia and found them very helpful. I alsoI found Dorothy Rowe's book on Inroversion and extroversion illuminating.

Whether that counts as reading self help books, I am not sure.

My son has read a lot and listened to some too.

He has found them helpful- they are mainly "business" types though...

Read bits on aspects I am interest in. Found them enlightening, personally.
I wasnt reading them espeically for myself, but trying to work out behaviour of other people.

Well, I've learned not to waste my money on self help books, if that's any help?

Seriously, though, I don't think I've read any.