I found this a unique gift

What a brilliant gift BlueBelle.My late MIL left a very detailed journal about her ancestors,including birth dates,addresses and their life stories.It was invaluable when tracing ancestors became easier with all the different internet sites.

Mabon well it was unique to me as I hadn’t seen the thousands that you have seen and I thought it was a kind and very thoughtful gift from a young person

I remember my father getting a lorry load of horse manure for Christmas. He was delighted. It wasn't wrapped, though there was a tag from his friend Lionel.

mabon1

Whilst it is a lovely gift it is not unique in the real sense of the word as there are thousands of them. What will make it unique is your input.

The first paragraph of BlueBelle's post makes clear her interpretation of the use of the word unique.

Sorry BlueBelle, crossed posts.

I’ve seen these all over Tik Tok it’s for them to get to know about your past. Very popular at the moment.

Thanks Aldom

Indigo8

My DD gave me 'Letters to my Grandchild' by Lea Redmond.
It is book of envelopes which open up to reveal lined paper to write on. Each envelope is titled with a topic about you and your family. You fill in the date when you wrote it and when it should be opened.

I have a problem getting started and can't think what to write, the first topic is "Here is a special story about our family".

You could start by explaining why you are writing the book - the special story about your family could be that people don't have to be rich and famous to be interesting (not saying you aren't rich and famous!) and that the most precious people to you are your family, so you want them to know about you and other family members before they were born.

Or you could skip that one, and go straight to an envelope with a title that grabs you to get your pencil moving. It gets easier after the creative juices start flowing, and it won't matter in which order you fill them in.

I received one of these books as a present from a friend. It was one of the most upsetting things I have ever received. Many of us carry tragic memories that we may never be ready to share and for a family member to discover something so personal would be catastrophic especially if it involved them and could resurrect deeply painful experiences for them.
For instance what was your unhappiest experience? what was the saddest day of your life? there were many other more light-hearted questions but trust me, the deeply emotional losses throw out any way of engaging with the happy questions. No family gets through life without pain, this can be a very dangerous and traumatizing reminder, with no warning. It would feel wrong and unauthentic to lie about some things that have happened and would be disrespectful to the person or people who were involved. Frankly I was horrified to be given such an insensitive item as a present. The person who gave me the present was an elderly retired headmistress who had never been married or had children. She meant no harm. I didn't show the book to anyone except my husband and we both agreed that it would go into the dustbin without anyone seeing it and without anyone filling it in.

That's such a lovely and thoughtful gift, lovely granddaughter will never forget you🫠

My daughter bought one for me about when her 15 years ago when her first baby had just been born. It was for a grandparent to complete. I have filled in bits of it but find some of it difficult.
There are lots around. Or there were.

My son has muted about filling one in, but my early life was unhappy and with both parents dying before I was 16 I ended up in care which is something I’d prefer to sweeten under the carpet

How, what an lovely idea.

I've recently made a photo book 'My life so far ......' to inform future generations about my life, which includes details such as where I've lived, countries I've visited, arrival of children, grandchildren etc. Mostly photos, but with some text too. Enjoyed doing it - and it solved the problem of what to do with all those old photos! I also made a photobook about my parents' early lives and had copies made for siblings as a solution to what to do with all the information I had about them after they both died in their mid 90s. Quite therapeutic and rewarding too.

Interesting. I may buy one.

What a lovely idea, never heard of this before. I imagine it takes a lot of thinking to complete but very worthwhile.

I’ve never come across these books before and think they’re a wonderful idea. However, I don’t think my family would be interested in my life. My daughter has done a family tree of her father’s family going back hundreds of years. She started doing one of my family but hit a wall quite soon, gave up on it and doesn’t seem interested in pursuing it.I guess I wasn’t interested in m parents lives until it was too late and there are so many unanswered questions now. I’d be really touched if someone in my family gave me one ofthose books.

kwest

I received one of these books as a present from a friend. It was one of the most upsetting things I have ever received. Many of us carry tragic memories that we may never be ready to share and for a family member to discover something so personal would be catastrophic especially if it involved them and could resurrect deeply painful experiences for them.
For instance what was your unhappiest experience? what was the saddest day of your life? there were many other more light-hearted questions but trust me, the deeply emotional losses throw out any way of engaging with the happy questions. No family gets through life without pain, this can be a very dangerous and traumatizing reminder, with no warning. It would feel wrong and unauthentic to lie about some things that have happened and would be disrespectful to the person or people who were involved. Frankly I was horrified to be given such an insensitive item as a present. The person who gave me the present was an elderly retired headmistress who had never been married or had children. She meant no harm. I didn't show the book to anyone except my husband and we both agreed that it would go into the dustbin without anyone seeing it and without anyone filling it in.

Why would you write down anything you found traumatic? Surely you would only writ things that you wouldn't mind others reading? I'm sure most people have things in their lives they wouldn't want to write about - or want others to read about, but you'd just pick and choose those memories you do want to write about.

I think I shall source one for myself. I always thought I'd remember the things my mum told me about the family but after she died I regretted not writing things down as I remember things vaguely but not the details. My brother in law researched his family tree so there's plenty info on my ex's side and my brother has a family bible which I guess has info on my father's family which I don't know. Another project to keep me busy.

How lovely that your granddaughter bought you this, and to know that she’s interested in your answers. I bought three copies of a book called The Grandparents’ Journal years ago, one for each of our adult children. I’ve spent hours filling them in so far (typing up the answers and printing them out in triplicate to paste in), but there’s still a long way to go. The journal’s American (there wasn’t much choice back then), so I’ve had to adapt a few questions about education, etc, but it’s good to have the guidance of what to talk about. I certainly won’t be putting in anything traumatic or upsetting! But like others, there are a lot of questions I wish I could ask my parents now.

I was given one a few years ago and totally forgot about it, I did a few pages, must get back to it. Thanks for reminding me 👏

Wow, kwest...talk about taking the shine off somebodies lovely gift!!
As stated, you could just put yours in the bin or choose not to write in it, Bluebelle was obviously delighted with her gift.

I've already "done" mine and DH's family trees so all the facts are there but one of these books seems to be more personal. I shall ask for one for my birthday later this month.

I wish I'd got one for my Mum before her memory started to go.

How lovely and very unique.