Manners in the supermarket

Good on this brilliant lady is what I say!

When I worked in Retail I had a particularly obnoxious customer that day.

I was serving another customer and this woman barged up and said to the first customer ''MOVE!''

The first customer snapped ''I will when I've finished being served, and will move if you say please, or isn't such a big adult word in your vocabulary?''

I absolutely died laughing as the obnoxious one stormed out!

When my children were small and I handed them a biscuit etc I would hang on to it until I received a thank you. They are now nearly 60 and have good manners.

Reading about peoples experiences of poor manners amongst staff I'm beginning to think I live in some sort of parallel universe. Yes if course the occasional person who is not polite but for the most part I find folk friendly and generally well mannered. I would never shout or call out at someone who's manners were different to mine.

I get sick of people pushing across you to get something...not an excuse me or a thank you! Manners have got worse since Covid! Some people seem to think they have a sense of entitlement these days and not just young people. Also applies to drivers who think the road is theirs and stuff the Highway Code..... Welcome to life in 2025!!

I seem to be living in a different world as I could not say a bad word for how we get treated at, what I would say, the biggest supermarket in our small town.
I will admit manners can be difficult sometimes in the street but so far nothing that is unusual.

Not only do the politeness words, 'please, thank you, you're welcome, sorry and excuse me' seem to have fallen from use but people rarely look behind them and hold the door for someone behind, they have forgotten how to use a roundabout and no-one wipes their feet anymore! (Except me!) Manners maketh man? Not any more.

Mogsmaw

It’s the ‘phones that get me!
Customers come to the till staring at their ‘phones, chuck stuff in your direction, never making eye contact or even acknowledging your existence and expecting you guess how they are paying.
They sigh when they have to change the screen so they can “pay by card”.
The woman who didn’t even notice I had fallen and needed colleagues to help me up because she was on her phone was an exceptionally poor excuse for a human being!

I agree with you 100pc...I work in a shop and it is the most rudest and ignorant way to treat someone who is talking to you/ trying to serve you... either that or they'll get to the front of the queue and then decide to ring someone to ask what they want...grrrrrrrrr

I regularly say good morning/good afternoon to bus drivers and thank you when I alight. The same owner has several bus companies in the wider area but only one operator's staff will respond. Same training ? so it is a cultural issue which varies from town to town? I've moved to a town which is well thought of but I find the general population stand offish as they do not respond to hello etc . One supermarket's staff do not say please or thank you. Again I think it is reflective of a town's culture. I deliberately say please etc just to irritate the hell out of the ignoramus

I opened a door to go into hotel in New York. As I opened it a young man with a brief case came rushing out through the door I was holding. I definitely forgot my manners and said very loudly "you ignorant pig". Not good manners on my part and definitely not sensible.

If I hold a door open and don’t get a thank you I call after them “sorry what did you say?” They invariably turn round and say “I didn’t say anything”, I then gleefully reply “oh sorry I thought you said thank you” and then go on my way chuckling to myself.

As my grandma used to say, Don't let other people's bad manners dictate the way you behave. People who let doors swing shut in your face, or don't say thank you when I hold one open for them - they're the ones that turn me into a sarcastic shrew (I always say, "You're welcome," which sometimes elicits a muttered, "Thanks" or an embarrassed (and usually smiling) apology. I think people's preoccupation is largely due to the invention of the mobile phone (which, not unlike the split atom, has managed to bring mixed advantages to humanity).

I always hold doors open for anyone with a pram/pushchair, I know how much I appreciated that when I was in that position often loaded down with bags attached too. 9/10 times that elicits a thanks, once though, a young woman walked through as I was holding open the door for her without so much as an acknowledgement, I called after her "tbanks is the word you're probably searching for" her "I don't have to thank you" me "I don't have to hold the door open for you" Manners cost nothing.

I hate going to the local supermarket and finding a male or female engrossed with their phone, blocking the aisle at the entrance or exit. I say quite loudly, "Excuse me, please," and then they realise their error.

I did ask one young lady how she coped without a mobile phone, but the look I received made me think of the dark ages.

petra

I’m assuming that the young woman was British?
If not there are cultural reasons for this.
A lot of cultures around the world do not thank people for doing the job they’re paid to do.
I found this in South Africa and mixing with Zimbabweans.
Also when I lived in an Eastern European country they did say thank you.
But once we started using it to waiting staff they loved it.

This can only be acceptable if people have just arrived/are tourists, if people have lived here for any length of time is very much a case of ‘when in Rome…
In Germany people don’t tend to say please or thank you but we have a friend with a German wife who says this quite naturally now.
No excuse really.

But it starts early.
I was astonished when a friend was showing off her baby granddaughter and a biscuit was produced; the assorted grannies, mothers etc chorused their version of thank you. The grandmother tossed her head and said proudly, oh she is very independent, she won't ever say thank you, as she grabbed the biscuit.
A voice behind me (I don't think it was me) muttered, she wouldn't get the biscuit then if she were mine.
Now twelve, this baby is extremely independent where manners are concerned.

A well brought up assistant there Maggiemaybe lol.

Astitchintime - we have the opposite experience with supermarket staff. Always do my weekly shop in Tesco in the next town from here, lovely ladies on the checkouts. Always a good morning and chat as they serve. Same in the Lidls. Last week I needed something extra so went to our towns Sainsbury, not realising they don't have checkout staff until 9am. So we had to negotiate the self service and had a couple issues with it. Two elderly staff members stood in their own little area and they were both reluctant to offer any help and neither spoke more than a couple words. As I left I said I wouldn't be back unless there was someone offering customer service.

My neighbours 5 yr old daughter did make us laugh a few weeks ago. We were unloading shopping from the car as she came out to go to school. Spotted my OH and said to him "good morning, how are you?" So they ended up having a quick chat before she went on her way.

I’ve told this tale before, but as it’s relevant I’ll do it again.

I was buying sweets with two of the grandsons at their local corner shop. As the young assistant took the money and handed the bags over, I said to the boys “Now what do you say?”. And the assistant swiftly replied “Thank you”.

Oh I’m with you. I cannot abide bad manners and rudeness. I hate it when ordering food in a restaurant and hear people saying ‘can I get’ instead of ‘please may I have’.

Manners do cost nothing but poor manners are often on the part of retail staff. All too often we used to get to the checkout at the supermarket, load up the conveyor and then move toward to till where a grumpy operator never made eye contact, didn't acknowledge our 'good morning' greeting, and practically threw everything aside as they scanned the bar codes...........thank goodness for self scan shopping! And there is a lovely young lady on there that helps if there's a problem with anything or to do random checks. How different people can be!

When you hold the door open for someone and they stride in often on a phone and no thanks. Or when someone pushes their shopping trolley into you there is no sorry. I am sad to see manners have disappeared but thankfully not by all. I am always reminding my little grandchildren of their pleases and thank you’s ……

Manners Maketh the Man.

Her forced “ Thank you” sounded British. But in any case this is Britain, not South Africa.

I’m assuming that the young woman was British?
If not there are cultural reasons for this.
A lot of cultures around the world do not thank people for doing the job they’re paid to do.
I found this in South Africa and mixing with Zimbabweans.
Also when I lived in an Eastern European country they did say thank you.
But once we started using it to waiting staff they loved it.

It is a sign of the times that there are often notices up in shops and other spaces used by the public requesting that people do not disrespect or abuse members of staff, or words to that end.
We shouldn't need to be told.

It’s the ‘phones that get me!
Customers come to the till staring at their ‘phones, chuck stuff in your direction, never making eye contact or even acknowledging your existence and expecting you guess how they are paying.
They sigh when they have to change the screen so they can “pay by card”.
The woman who didn’t even notice I had fallen and needed colleagues to help me up because she was on her phone was an exceptionally poor excuse for a human being!