The meaning of "just after 9"

A friend was due to pop something round at 3, knowing I was going out at 3.30.

She arrived at 4pm. Luckily daughter was in but said friend then contacted me, to berate me for not being in when she called !

I am pretty obsessed with good timekeeping so I tend to always be early for things. As most people I know, DH definitely included, seem not to care about being on time I seem to spend a great deal of wasted time waiting for others to turn up.
I lived in Scotland for 20 years and never could get my head round the expression "back of" as in back of 9 etc. Did they mean 5 past?, 10 past? half past? Seemed like I was always waiting!

A new boyfriend was very late arriving for a meal I'd cooked but I accepted his excuses. 17 years later, I finally realised how wrong I'd been.

That's what I shall do from now on how many times do people say 'i'll meet u outside?'

I remember waiting 40 minutes for someone once. Outside and nowhere to sit. In the dark. Getting a cold. It was busy and I think they hoped I'd give up but I had no energy to go anywhere alone I was 2 hours public transport from home. Every few years for no reason I remember this!!! It

Since retirement apart from appointments I don’t have a rigid timetable. If a friend is coming around it’s usually “see you about 9 ish” I’m at home so it doesn’t have to be on the dot.

If my family are coming to visit they give a rough time especially allowing for traffic. When on the way to visit our family we text when about five minutes away so they can get the kettle on.

If we have mobile contact and I hear nothing then I'm off after 10 minutes.

Whitewavemark2

I’m the one who always arrives first. I was the same when working - lived in horror at being late for an appointment.

Me too. I can understand why someone might qualify a 9.00 appointment by saying ‘just after’ however, if the only transport available would get them there at 6.00 or 8.55. If there is a big waiting room it’s ok to take up a seat and camp out with a flask and knitting, but in (say) a local hairdresser or solicitor, that’s not always an option for more than a few minutes. If meeting a friend then it’s easier to explain any constraints and make arrangements accordingly.

I’m the one who always arrives first. I was the same when working - lived in horror at being late for an appointment.

I like to arrive early but not hours early, especially if relying on public transport. Cannot understand why latecomers blame a bus/train for a late arrival, I always get a bus/train that will get me to my destination with plenty of time to spare, and if it doesn’t arrive/breaks down I have time to wait for the next one or order a taxi. Getting somewhere by the skin of my teeth to arrive with just second to spare would kill me. Have two daughters who do this though.

I think the thread is more about people waiting in coffee shops or restaurants, though.

Some of the thread. Mine was a work appointment.

Waiting rooms are different if there are enough seats to go around. Sometimes transport is such that people can’t arrive bang on time anyway.

I think the thread is more about people waiting in coffee shops or restaurants, though.

But the "different matter" could easily be dealt with by (a) explaining exactly what you mean and (b) chilling and not minding if people bumble in early and muck in with preparations.

Nowt wrong with arriving early for an appointment, surely? I usually do and when waiting rooms weren't universally contaminated with noise pollution (radio, etc), I would happily read a book and not bother anyone.

Dinner parties are a different matter.

I agree, turning up early is annoying too.
Just after 9 means no later than 9.15, I think. Any later is just rude.

My mum failed to see that arriving too early was just as rude as arriving late.
That blooming woman!!!

My DH is always late, which we blame on his being Welsh, not on his ADHD! His college friends have learned to say 'meet at 19:30', when they really mean 20:00.

My father was always way early for everything and we worked out he'd probably spent most of his life waiting around until the allotted time, instead of doing something useful with all that time he'd have saved!

My mum was like that.
We'd arrange a time, then she'd turn up 2 hours earlier and sit jingling her car keys until I was ready.

We fell out over it regularly.

We are opposite too.
My dh is very early everywhere he or we go. He had a hospital appointment at 9 am today and was up snd ready to go at 7 am. The hospital is a 10 minute drive away.
I am rarely late and like to arrive on time but to save argument we always arrive too early.
Last time we flew we were at Stansted 5 hours before our short haul flight. 😡

My mum and dad nearly never got to have their first date because of my dad's lackadaisical approach to time.

It drove my mum crazy, as she liked to arrive everywhere far too early.

I would say 9:15 and then leave. Mind you when I was much younger I waited nearly two hours for someone. Someone I was deeply in love with at the time.
Lots of reasons to wait, lots to go.

I would be off if they hadn’t come in 15 minutes, the arrogance of it.

I'd allow up to 9.15 without a message. After that I'd expect to be contacted with an explanation.

When in his teens, DH had a friend who was consistently late. This friend was always told that the meeting time was 30 minutes earlier than was actually intended...

I think people who are habitually late have no consideration for other people’s time. I can’t count the times I have waited around for latecomers to show up, but no more. I haven’t got enough time left to waste it.

My best friend died in 2008, she was well known for being late. One morning she phoned to say she would call in for coffee that morning and arrived 2 days later, it was no point getting annoyed with her.
We had tickets to see the Beautiful South back in their early days, so I told her the gig started at 7pm (I think they were actually due on stage at 9pm), she actually turned up on time that evening and we were far too early lol
On the day of her funeral the service started right on time, I was hoping it would be late as I was always telling her "you will be late for your own funeral "