i have moved 19 times as an adult, both here and abroad and nothing to do with the forces. The hardest move was this last one as my husband had died but i still lived in the house we shared for over 5 years. This was a sensible move to a ground floor flat as have back problems etc , but this was in the time of covid, so could have no help from family or friends and was downsizing from a 3 bedroom house with a large garden. The garden was the most painful to leave, i had over 100 different snowdrops hellebores etc etc. Also it had been a happy home for us both and while I lived there it felt as though he was still with me.
Anyway what I wanted to pass on were a few tips that might be of help to any of you moving.
So firstly I get a sturdy little notebook and give each room in the new house a few pages.Then once you are sure that this is your new home , this is fiddly but very worth while. Get some graph paper and do a very clear plan of your new place to scale. Check it carefully as you are using it to plan and it needs to be accurate. Then the really fiddly bit. Measure all the furniture tables chairs etc and to scale cut out a little bit of paper and put a number on it. Make a list of the numbers and show what the item is beside the number.
Then you begin the game. Start by putting the furniture into the rooms you think you want them to go to. Also, draw a line to indicate which way doors open on cupboards etc and the cooker. So you go through putting it all in the various rooms. Then you can see how this room will be too cluttered, or there is no way you can put item 3 in the same room as 5. I had an upright very good piano and have had it for a long time and spent quite a few days trying every possible combination of furniture before I had to admit defeat and acknowledge that I would have to sell it and get something else later.
So it is much easier to move bits of paper around, you can each start by just putting things the way you would like and then looking at the variations and coming to a decision about what is possible and what is not. It is much less stressful to do it this way, because you are confronted by the obvious and clear indication that this thing will not move. Once you have done this you can work together to decide if there is one piece of furniture that you must have and rearrange rooms to fit that, or it makes you realize that it has to go.
That is the hard bit but when you are then convinced that things have to go you sell them and give them away from your old property, thus saving money and time for the loading up for the new place. Also if you have measured up well you will also now be reasonably clear which room you want things to go in so you stick clear simple squares of different colours and then for the removal men it is simple. All green goes in the bedroom , all red in the lounge. This way although it is always stressful and hard moving but you feel in charge doing it like this.
Then other tips that i have found very useful. Sometimes it can take more time than you expect to exchange contracts. If the sale is amicable ask permission from the people you are buying from to take photos of the garden from the various angles. print the photos, dont keep them on the phone. on the back write the date taken and the time of day. You will not have time to do much to the garden when you first arrive but when you are ready you have photos that show you what is growing where and where the sun is etc and it stops you digging up something precious by mistake. Also in years to come when you have turned it into a lovely garden and open it for the NGS you have these old photos to show how it was when you first arrived .
Then back to the book. for each room as you arrive when the room is bare, make notes on things like the loose floorboard where you can look at the pipes or cables, where the plugs are (and if the wiring is poor consider having the plugs moved further up the wall so that you dont have to bend to the floor later when it may be difficult.) Dont immediately throw out carpets and decorate. If you leave the old carpet down it will do you for the beginning and allow you to actually live in the place before you commit to large amounts of money changing things and then not really liking what you have done. Let the house and garden tell you first. Note which is the sunny room, which gets the shadow etc. Then when you do decide to decorate write in the appropriate room page how much wallpaper you needed, the size of the windows, do you want to put in any extra plugs or lights before you wallpaper/ but if you do this then you have the record for future changes. I am a woman of champagne tastes and beer money. So when we first arrive somewhere you are looking round to find out lots of things, so with your handy little book of measurments you can wander about and find sales, and sometimes super curtains that will be fine in a charity shop. One of the best buys I made was many years ago when we bought a lovely old terraced house with high ceilings and very big. The hall , landing and stairs needed 33 rolls of wallpaper!! Added to that it was a very old house so corners where not straight etc. So after looking for about a week I found a wallpaper shop that was selling a discontinued line and it was basically little sprigs on a cream background. I bought the whole box of 36 rolls for £1 a roll, so that was £36 for the lot. It went on very well with 3 rolls to spare and gave me space to put my watercolours up like a gallery.
A couple more things. when you are looking in an area for properties get the local paper sent to you each week. You will see what is happening in the new town and if you keep seeing fights in bloggs road several times you will disregard the details for the house there! My first day always includes going to the library and registering. Partly as I am a book a holic, but the library keeps the addresses and information up to date on all sorts of things so if you want to play chess or sew quilts they will have the latest contacts.
Then this sounds like a luxury but I can assure you that I find it is worth every penny and avoids the divorce when the move has got you both to a frazzle. On your visits to your new place look round for a simple b'/b and preferably with an evening meal possible. So then if you book the night of the day you arrive with the furniture, then you can work methodically to do things however you want, room by room or whatever, because when you are weary you know that when you have had enough, you can go to somewhere and have a good shower and a sit down and a meal and recupterate. Then the next morning after a decent nights sleep and a good breakfast you are ready to carry on in your home. If you cannot do this then I always have a big bag for each person, In it there is at least 3 changes of underwhere and a spare set of jumpers t shirts and wash bag and your pillow. Most people sleep better with their own pillow. Gget the removal men to take you bedroom stuff in first and make that the priority to make up the bed and have your washbags and towels in the bathroom. When they have gone look around and put a chair each facing out into the garden, with a table or something you can use for a table and a light. So everytime you feel shattered you can sit down but not look at the mess. Take photos of each room before you put things into it when you first arrive and then just make sure you have your beds done, and definitely I suggest you go out for a meal ot a local pub or restaurant rahter than have a take away as it gives you a little time away from the shambles.
Good Morning Monday 18th May 2026
