How do you feel about last minute invitations?

Babs03

If you really want to go that is fine, but I spent years being a people pleaser, once in my sixties I decided to knock it on the head, so just as life is too short to not accept last minute invitations it is also too short to accept them if you really don't want to go.

Yes, yes, yes!!

I cannot even count the number of times I’ve said “yes” when I really meant “no thank you”

Astitchintime

It wouldn't bother me, in fact I would welcome such an invitation. We know a number of people, singles and couples, who are very, very set in their ways.......... Shopping done at set times, a strict housework schedule ( think 'can't entertain a random visitor because they are washing the bathroom floor/cleaning the windows/doing the ironing') . That lifestyle would drive me insane.

That lifestyle would drive me insane.

But it clearly suits them.

I'm sure those who are 'set in their ways' can be perfectly nice people. Just different to those who aren't. And, sometimes, there are good reasons why people have to work to a schedule.

There's no rule on this - except possibly one of polite refusal except maybe in the case of BlueBelle who appears to have been invited to a party because someone else had dropped out!

... but even she declined politely

Cossy

Depends, tbh, on the situation.

Sometimes I welcome it, other times not!

I'm with Cossy - it all depends on the situation at the time of the invite...

The last of my defrosted food was eaten yesterday and I am still alive! I took a home cooked meal out of the freezer on Friday just before bedtime. As I didn’t eat it on Sunday as planned, because I accepted the last minute invitation, and it was enough for two days, it lasted until Tuesday.

I think it depends on how much you value having a social life. Mine is poor which I know is largely my fault. I would accept any last minute invitation unless it involved night driving which I no longer like to do.
I have a friend who has (to me) an enviable social life. When I mentioned this to her she said the secret is “get up, dress up and show up.” If driving is a problem find a way round it. Get a taxi, ask for a lift etc.

BlueBelle

I had a lady invite me to her party because someone had dropped out and she had a place vacant she actually said those words to me, I politely declined….. I wonder why ?

I hope you said,, sorry I don't do second best.. how rude is she.

We were once invited to a wedding the week before! Think they were short of guests - we didn’t go!

It wouldn't bother me, in fact I would welcome such an invitation. We know a number of people, singles and couples, who are very, very set in their ways.......... Shopping done at set times, a strict housework schedule ( think 'can't entertain a random visitor because they are washing the bathroom floor/cleaning the windows/doing the ironing') . That lifestyle would drive me insane.

Fgs last minute invitations for me are a Godsend you’re defrosted food can be used the next day so don’t fret, get out and enjoy yourself life’s for living 😘😘😘

I’m with your husband Canadiangran I like((need as I ve got older) to plan and be prepared I don’t like spontaneity it throws me completely and my brain would go into a frazzle I like to know a time line and build up to something I don’t Ike surprises either what if I don’t like the surprise !

I had a lady invite me to her party because someone had dropped out and she had a place vacant she actually said those words to me, I politely declined….. I wonder why ?

It depends who is doing the asking, what the event /activity is, and whether or not I can be bothered to go.

I prefer to plan in advance, so I can do things I need to do before I go, and all the clothes I would need are clean and sorted and I have everything I need.
But I'd go with an impromptu invite, as long as the pets were fed and watered. Take me as you find me just as long as you're happy with that

I love spontaneity, so I would say yes. I would have to drag a grumbling husband... if it's not marked on the calendar, it's not on!

Since I got arthritis and fatigue, it takes me ages to get ready to go out, so it depends on how much notice I get. I just don't feel like going out if it's going to be a drag getting ready. I've tried to explain this to friends who drop last-minute invitations on me right at the last minute, but I think it's hard for her to take in why I find it difficult accepting a last minute invitation.

A last minute invite wouldn’t bother me. Some of my best times have been a last minute spontaneous invite. Defrosted food can stay in the fridge for the next day .

It depends on the occasion. If my neighbour rang and said, why don't you join us for supper tonight, then I'd be grateful and I would go.
But if it involved changing, driving 30 miles in the dark, it would have to be something very special for me to accept.

and of course...later they are all replete, and want to stay out, and I just want to go home for my tea !!!

well I feel stupidly mixed..how awkward am I ? (Don't answer that) So, sometimes I hate last minute because as others have said, I haven't planned, might not have washed my hair, that sort of thing.Then on the other hand if someone invites me to something too far in advance, I start to feel anxiety about what to wear, who else will be there, how I will get there or get home, if I am expected to eat or not eat etc etc.
What really annoys me though is getting asked out like the OP at a later time, but unlike the OP , on a couple of occasionsI received an invitation to meet up at 2.30-3 then when I've got there, after about half an hour , everyone orders a late lunch, I haven't been told we were to eat out and I had lunch before going so then have to sit there while everyone else eats and it makes it look like I'm too mean to buy lunch out. I find that highly embarasssing.

It depends if this is a regular thing. Brother in law who lived away would 3 or 4 times a year just turn up to his mother's house and she would be frantically ringing round to get family to go and meet up. If you said you already had plans he would take offence. No idea why he could not ring beforehand to let us know he was coming ( before email). He never even checked that his parents would be at home, just assumed they were waiting for his visit. Perhaps he thought he was more important than the rest of the family, he certainly wanted us to treat it like a Royal visit.

Aveline

I don't know really. It depends on the current situation and also the person asking I suppose.
The most graceless 'spontaneous' invitation was an email saying that, as two people had dropped out, we were now invited to her party the next evening. We didn't go!

Aveline,
How unkind of them! You were so right not to go! I would have been inclined to send a note saying: ‘thank you for your invitation. Normally we would have been delighted to accept, but as you invited us only because someone else dropped out, and not because you wanted us, regretfully, we won’t be coming’.
Of course, they probably won’t be your friends after that but it doesn’t sound as though it’s much of a loss!

I don’t mind last minute, I’d get dressed and leave the defrosted food for the next day. Enjoy yourself while you’ve got good health to get out the house.

I turn on a sixpence for either of my sons. For anyone else it would be dependent on mood and time allowed to comply. Don't ever rush nowadays but.....love being in company of friends. A challenge sometimes but it is lovely to be invited.

That kind of late invitation wouldn't bother me but then I don't like routine A late invitation to a big do would annoy me intensely and I would decline

I'd definitely go, you don't know when you'd be invited out again. Keep your meal in the fridge, it'll be fine.