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Nodding off

(48 Posts)
merlotgran Wed 09-Apr-25 16:51:31

Has the OP disappeared?

NotSpaghetti Wed 09-Apr-25 16:37:57

I still don't understand what exactly happened.

I think the details are critical here to be honest.

Shelflife Wed 09-Apr-25 15:40:56

Stop beating yourself up , you dozed for a short time while your sleeping GC was perfectly safe - for goodness sake what is the problem!?

Cossy Wed 09-Apr-25 13:22:55

I see no issue unless you’re nodding off whilst little one is running around.

I was always napping when our last two came along, they were such appalling sleepers at night, so naps for us all!

Elowen33 Wed 09-Apr-25 13:02:42

Maybe your daughter is worried that you would fall asleep if you were sitting down whilst the child was awake.

If you are confident that this wouldn’t happen then I do not see a problem.

RosieandherMaw Wed 09-Apr-25 12:25:27

I think we’ve all been there one way or another. (I might not have mentioned it to her though new mums can be naturally -even over- anxious)
I have before now often “rested my eyes” during a bedtime story.
I still cherish pictures of GS3 who was a desperately restless baby and had to be carried around to go off to sleep. One pic shows D3 (his aunt) cradling him because her sister who was desperately tired after a long long labour was nevertheless unable to fall asleep without her baby.
The other shows D2 (mum) and GS at a couple of weeks, this time she has GS on her lap in one of those “doughnut” feeding cushions, she is totally zonked out and I had promised I would watch over them both with an eagle eye if the baby so much as moved a muscle.
Try to play this down and not let it get to you- if you can persuade your D it was a one off and the little one was quite safe without making a thing of it, all will eventually be well.

Allira Wed 09-Apr-25 12:08:49

I have "nodded off" with my own children years ago - I'm sure mosg of us have done that - reading a story at bedtime (say) or trying to encourage them to nap - but not my grandchildren.

I remember lying on DD2's bed with her, reading a story and I nodded off a few times, only to be poked in the ribs or have a little someone lifting an eyelid to ask if I was going to finish the story.

However, if I shut my eyes while holding or feeding a baby, some instinct would jerk me awake again instantly.

NotSpaghetti Wed 09-Apr-25 06:19:31

I think Nan54 we can't say whether or not it was irresponsible or not because we don't have enough information.

I have "nodded off" with my own children years ago - I'm sure mosg of us have done that - reading a story at bedtime (say) or trying to encourage them to nap - but not my grandchildren.

Allira Tue 08-Apr-25 21:51:38

We were lucky because a kind neighbour lent us a good quality Mamas and Papas cot on permaloan when I was looking after the DGC, plus sheets. I did buy a new mattress for it.

When we'd finished with it the neighbour then passed it on to someone else.

Allira Tue 08-Apr-25 21:48:16

Maybe we need to know more detail about the age of the child and where they were sleeping in case that was the worry.

Yes.

cornergran Tue 08-Apr-25 21:44:50

It’s something I’ve done with all three grandchildren and indeed my own. They slept and sometimes so did I for a short while, always woke before they did.

As long as the child is age appropriately safe and comfortable I’m not sure why it would be a problem unless the parent had concerns about the carers health - whoever the carer might be, not just a grandparent.

Maybe we need to know more detail about the age of the child and where they were sleeping in case that was the worry.

Sara1954 Tue 08-Apr-25 21:44:48

On many occasions I’ve nodded of with a sleeping toddler or baby lying on me, never occurred to me that it was irresponsible, no harm done, I actually think it’s quite useful to recharge your batteries if you get a chance.

Allira Tue 08-Apr-25 21:38:17

But what was she fastened in?

fancythat Tue 08-Apr-25 21:36:20

If she was safe as all fastened in,
or if a child is in a cot, then ok by me.

Otherwise, I wouldnt presonally be happy about it.

crazyH Tue 08-Apr-25 21:13:39

I’m with merlotgran on this. Why did you even mention it to your daughter?
I often nod off on the sofa with a sleeping baby/toddler on my lap.

Allira Tue 08-Apr-25 20:59:21

snuggle down
No sure what that means, exactly.

Allira Tue 08-Apr-25 20:57:53

She was safe as she was all fastened in and loves to snuggle down.

Just a couple of questions:
Was your DGD sleeping in a pushchair or car seat or lying in a cot?
How old is she?

I ask because babies sleeping in pushchairs or car seats are vulnerable because their heads can drop forward leaving them unable to breathe.

NotSpaghetti Tue 08-Apr-25 20:57:17

What does "fastened in" mean please?

M0nica Tue 08-Apr-25 20:54:51

Is what you did any different to putting a child to sleep in another room and just peeking at them every 15 minutes or so.

I used to put my little ones to sleep in their cot is in their bedroom and leave them sleeping until they cried or called me.

merlotgran Tue 08-Apr-25 20:46:38

Don’t be too hard on yourself. We’ve all done it. Silence and a sleeping child is enough to lull anyone to sleep if you’re tired and you say your granddaughter was perfectly safe.

Why did you even mention it to your daughter unless you are worried that something might be wrong with you?
If that the case your daughter is right to think twice about letting you child mind again.

CanadianGran Tue 08-Apr-25 20:36:38

Oh gosh, I often napped on the couch when my little ones still woke through the night. I can't see the harm, as long as you know that you sleep lightly so you will hear your GD when she rouses.

You and GD can have a quiet hour together. Depending on her age, if she naps in a cot, then nap next to her on the sofa . If she naps in a bed, then lay down with her, or put a baby fence across the door so she cannot wander.

Obviously I am a lover of naps!

HelterSkelter1 Tue 08-Apr-25 19:49:36

Are you doing regular child care or was this a one off to help out? And are you on your own in the house?

I think if you are on your own and it's regular child care I would be siding with your DD and arranging alternative care in case you are off colour again and nod off when you have no back up.

If it was a one off and I were your DD it's still not the best of circumstances, but you didnt want to disappoint her even though you were off colour. I imagine her normal carer had cancelled. If you nodded off by mistake it's one thing, but if you planned to have a sleep I wouldn't be too happy. Such a responsibility looking after another's child especially if you are on your own and maybe quite elderly.

Nan54 Tue 08-Apr-25 19:13:29

Hi, just a quick question, but am i irresponsible for nodding of to sleep whilst caring for my granddaughter whilst she was asleep in the same room. She was safe as she was all fastened in and loves to snuggle down. I had been feeling a little off but didn't want to let my Daughter down, so had carried on regardless. Now she is saying she's worried about me having her again! Please give me advice, as it has fair upset me.