Giving siblings birthday presents

I find that strange and over the tops.
The birthday girl/boy should be the one for a gift.

My elder two have the same birthday but two years apart. Youngest is two and a bit years younger than his nearest sibling. My mum started the ‘tradition’ of all three children getting presents (the actual birthday person would get a bigger present) on their birthdays. I can’t remember when it stopped, but I certainly don’t do it now they’re 44, 42 and 40.

No. You are supposed to be spoilt on your special day. Your birthday is your special day. Nothing to do with discipline, more to do with respecting others and knowing you are not always the centre of attention.

No, they have to learn that sometimes the focus is on someone else, not them. It won't hurt them to take a back seat once a year (or however many sibs they have).

Never occured to me to give presents to siblings on birthdays.

My own children were born close together and generally shared and played together with everything anyway. So there wasn’t really much feeling of this is mine.

A party was a party for everyone.

I’ve never bought extra presents for any brothers or sisters of various child relatives.

Bet they think I’m a cheapskate😬

Yes, always. My grandchildren are 13 and 8. Not sure when I stop but they love it and so do I

Agree with FGT. My second and third babies thoughtfully arrived with some small toy animal ready in the cot for siblings first visit.

Do you think it makes a difference how many children there are other than the birthday child?
It never occurred to me to buy the siblings a present as well; we have three children and they all had their special day, but then there wasn't just one being left out 🤷🏼‍♀️

No, I am absolutely with Fried Green Tomatoes in this one. There are so many other opportunities for teaching discipline. Very young ones don’t understand why they’re not getting anything. I’ve always bought a pair of PJs or a small book or some such for the unbirthday child. My kind and gentle mother would never give to just one child if the other wasn’t getting anything and I have continued the tradition.

No never, the children have to learn that they each have a discipline day.

I have Half Birthdays for my DDs (hides behind the sofa!). It was started by my Mum when DD2 was born and we carry on after she died. There is exactly four and a half years, to the day, between them. We always go out for a meal and present swap - the half birthday girl gets a card, then generally fizz, flowers and perfume from her sister and me.

It’s OK - I know we’re mad! 😂

When I was young and it was my sister’s birthday in May, I always received a present from one of my aunties then, instead of on my actual birthday. I quite liked getting an ‘extra’ present then, though it wasn’t really extra. I didn’t get another present on my birthday but as it is in December, Christmas soon followed, so I didn’t mind.

My youngest two had birthdays the day after each other, my mother always sent a present for the their sister when they were all small. It’s hard for a three year old to comprehend why they were not included. (My family happened rather than were planned!)

paddyann54

No but I always buy a wee present for a young sibling of a new born .Sometimes people are so focused on the baby the toddler feels pushed aside .If the sibling is older ,my daughter was 10 when her brother was born I only buy for the baby and maybe some nice body products for the mum .Often forgotten in the excitement of a newborn

Same.

So at what age do people stop buying the sibling a present?

My older DD was given a present by my very kind older friend when my younge DD was born. Such a kind gesture which I would not have thought of...but woukd do now.
The fun slippers for both children is a good idea. But a separate different present for the non birthday child I would question.

At one birthday party the younger rather spoilt child insisted on blowing out the candles on the cake and was allowed to, but spat all over it...not intentionally I think.... no one fancied a slice even though it was wiped with a J cloth!

Absolutely yes - kids are kids and love the whole thrill of it all. Plus, they're not kids for long - make the most of the joy giving.

When they were little we would give the other so thing small. Not now they have grown though.

Yes. Spread joy, love, happiness as wide as possible.

The only time I have given a gift to a sibling has been at the birth of a new sibling. I think it helps the elder sibling not to feel pushed out amidst all the joy of a new arrival in the family.

The green eyed monster took over 2 year old DGD at her sister's 5th birthday tea recently. There was lots of snatching of presents and general grumpiness. When the birthday cake appeared and the candles were blown out she burst into sobs of disappointment. The candles were re-lit and the non-birthday girl had her chance which cheered her up.

Both girls were given matching fun slippers and harmony was restored as they stomped around together showing them off.

I don't think there's any harm in making a fuss of the sibling at that age

paddyann54

No but I always buy a wee present for a young sibling of a new born .Sometimes people are so focused on the baby the toddler feels pushed aside .If the sibling is older ,my daughter was 10 when her brother was born I only buy for the baby and maybe some nice body products for the mum .Often forgotten in the excitement of a newborn

Me too, for young-child siblings.

There are other days for life’s lessons imo. Why not spread the joy on the day? Ours are 13 and almost 9. A few more years yet of double bubble birthday buying. Why not? 💕 they love it, so do I and their parents think it’s very generous. So a win/win/win in our little family.

Always.

No but I always buy a wee present for a young sibling of a new born .Sometimes people are so focused on the baby the toddler feels pushed aside .If the sibling is older ,my daughter was 10 when her brother was born I only buy for the baby and maybe some nice body products for the mum .Often forgotten in the excitement of a newborn