Gransnet forums

Chat

Work and DH

(11 Posts)
Biscuitmuncher Thu 30-Oct-25 18:02:07

I've always been a stay at home mum, but as the years have gone on DH has wanted me to find work, fair enough. I've found a nice little job that involves some weekend work, he's sulking now we don't do anything. I don't work Saturday afternoon but he wants to go out in the morning so I go out with DD in the afternoon. I feel like I just can't win

Babs03 Thu 30-Oct-25 18:07:05

It seems that your DH takes a bit too much upon himself. So he says he wants you to work, not great, that is your decision to make not his, unless you are both hard up and need the money. Then he doesn’t like the terms of your job.
Do you have to act upon his wishes?
Does he ever act upon yours?
I think he needs a word.

Ilovecheese Thu 30-Oct-25 18:12:58

I hope he has taken on more household jobs now that you are working.

Biscuitmuncher Thu 30-Oct-25 18:18:54

No I'm still doing the same.

Ilovecheese Thu 30-Oct-25 18:49:56

I suspected as much!

AGAA4 Thu 30-Oct-25 18:51:57

You've done what your DH wanted and found a job. Now he's complaining that you aren't around when he wants you to be. He is being very unreasonable.

HelterSkelter1 Thu 30-Oct-25 19:11:40

I remember your post when he wanted you to get a job. You had loads of good advice then so I am so pleased you found a job which suited you. I expecr he doesnt like the weekend work. Does he do something on Sat afternoons which stops him from doing something with you then. Golf?? I would ignore him if I were you and go out with your DD.
He could always do some housework on sat mornings if he is bored.

Biscuitmuncher Thu 30-Oct-25 19:27:00

HelterSkelter no he doesn't do anything, and he's invited out with me and our daughter. He's just sulking

Magenta8 Thu 30-Oct-25 20:58:18

It often strikes me that though working women are as capable as working as men, far too many men like to be "incapable" of doing housework. They seem to want to have their cake and eat it. My DD calls it weaponised incompetence.

However, I am well aware that quite a few men are not like this and do their share of the chores.

Babs03 Thu 30-Oct-25 21:30:29

I find it laughable that grown men say quite seriously that men can’t multi task and that women are much more able to do this. Yeah so is then easier to let the little woman run herself ragged doing all the chores and childcare whilst the husband just cleans the car. Men can multi task they just don’t want to do it.

Wyllow3 Thu 30-Oct-25 21:45:09

If you enjoy your new work and the company and new perspectives it brings, carry on, go for it.

And stop cooking all his meals hour for hour equivalent. 😎

Do you have to work that day, btw? it does seem a shame to miss Saturday afternoons out with DD?