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What to do with old stuff.

(59 Posts)
DotScot Wed 26-Nov-25 14:23:16

Decided to tackle just one of the several boxes that we were sent when my mother-in-law died. Masses of photos of course. But other stuff that's more tricky and I just don't know what to do with it.
A first day cover and other stamps designed by her father, who was an eminent artist in Ireland. We might try to sell them, I suppose, but could they be of interest to future generations of the family? But if kept, how should such things be stored and where?
Quite nice watercolours that she did - the genes were obviously strong - but we've nowhere now to hang them.
A little wooden box that she made herself.
Pristine pillowcases from Irish Linen with embroidered designs that she created and they used commercially.
The list goes on.
We've enough hard decisions with our own stuff. I don't consider myself a hoarder of useless things (although...all my school reports, and all my children's school reports?) My husband's collection of old screws and washers in the shed though - THAT'S hoarding!
But I just can't put these things from my mother-in-law in the bin and I doubt that charity shops would want them.
Help!

eddiecat78 Sat 29-Nov-25 13:05:34

Sadly most auction houses will only accept things they are confident will sell for a good price and some have a minimum expected sale price. Programmes like Bargain Hunt give the impression they are happy to sell things for just a few pounds - in reality they would not have accepted those low value items. There is also the question of being charged commission on things that do sell - our local auction house takes 30%
Charities are also very choosy about what they will take.
We've found Facebook Marketplace the best place to sell - or to offer for free for less popular items

Shel69 Sat 29-Nov-25 08:59:16

That's difficult, I was so overwhelmed 2 years ago I emptied my junk drawer into the bin outside that was ready for collection, didn't check it, I have only a very vague collection what was in it but havnt missed a thing, sadly I've filled the drawer again

Sarahr Sat 29-Nov-25 08:19:01

Have a word with an auction house. Unless anyone in the family definitely wants items and is happy to have them now, then you are better off selling to a collector who will ensure the items are treasured for many more years.
When I die, I know that nobody is interested in my Great Aunt's collection which I love, so we are looking into selling so the items don't just end up in a skip.

Elegran Fri 28-Nov-25 20:20:13

THEIR old cameras etc, not just his!

Elegran Fri 28-Nov-25 20:19:03

Allira

Grammaretto

Well done Elegran
But is anyone poised to take on your role when you go?
I have inherited not only the contents of DM house, including her university notes and artwork but my late DH's library, research, objects galore and some of his DP's stuff as well as the paraphernalia from a cousin who left everything to him!

She used to give illustrated talks on Edinburgh's history, as had her father before her but what should I be doing with their old cameras, their handwritten notes and so on?
It's weighing me down.
I've tried asking other cousins but they don't even reply.

I'm desperate to downsize.

A local museum?

There is a camera museum in St Monans which would treasure his old cameras - his notes too, and a biography to keep alongside his cameras, and any photos you could spare. If you pm me I will send you a contact link. It is not open all the time to visitors - I can find out more details for anyone who might be in the East Neuk of Fife and would be interested to visit.

DotScot Fri 28-Nov-25 13:31:44

Yes elegran! Exactly! I know in the roofspace there's a box with the very entertaining speeches my late father in law gave to the eminent groups he was part of. And we have 3 bound copies of his PhD thesis. It's such a weighty responsibility isn't it?

Grammaretto Fri 28-Nov-25 12:07:29

I will try a museum Allira but most museums have very little space.
I'll let you know if I have any luck.

Allira Fri 28-Nov-25 11:28:58

Grammaretto

Well done Elegran
But is anyone poised to take on your role when you go?
I have inherited not only the contents of DM house, including her university notes and artwork but my late DH's library, research, objects galore and some of his DP's stuff as well as the paraphernalia from a cousin who left everything to him!

She used to give illustrated talks on Edinburgh's history, as had her father before her but what should I be doing with their old cameras, their handwritten notes and so on?
It's weighing me down.
I've tried asking other cousins but they don't even reply.

I'm desperate to downsize.

A local museum?

Allira Fri 28-Nov-25 11:27:53

BlueBelle

Absolutely the worst advice ever goldieoldie how can you just chuck someone's life away without a care, very harsh way of thinking just wipe someone’s life out in a shredder
Hopefully your advice will fall on deaf ears

I suppose goldieoldie can shred her own life if she wants to, but not someone else's.

Not everyone has a family to pass the history on to or anyone who cares a jot. Perhaps goldieoldie has no-one. ☹

Grammaretto Fri 28-Nov-25 11:22:36

Well done Elegran
But is anyone poised to take on your role when you go?
I have inherited not only the contents of DM house, including her university notes and artwork but my late DH's library, research, objects galore and some of his DP's stuff as well as the paraphernalia from a cousin who left everything to him!

She used to give illustrated talks on Edinburgh's history, as had her father before her but what should I be doing with their old cameras, their handwritten notes and so on?
It's weighing me down.
I've tried asking other cousins but they don't even reply.

I'm desperate to downsize.

Sarnia Fri 28-Nov-25 11:06:15

A dear DIL with a love of vintage would like the large china tea set left to me by an aunt. The remainder of the family are delighted. They viewed this set as the booby prize in a raffle. Youngsters today don't want all the clutter and knick-knacks that their parents accumulate.

Elegran Fri 28-Nov-25 10:07:51

Should have been " how your parents and grandparents lived" not your "parents and grandchildren", of course.

Posted from the keeper of the Family Annals. Just yesterday I received two interesting messages - one to tell me that my cousin's daughter, a writer, could be heard on Ch 4. The other was thanks from a different cousin I has passed that info onto, who added that she now has another grandchild to be added to the family tree.

Elegran Fri 28-Nov-25 10:01:17

If you follow the "Chuck it all away" and "Shred it" advice you might as well also give up right now (or preferably much earlier, at about 5 years old) and do absolutely nothing with your life. Don't learn any skills, get a boring job where you will never achieve anything, don't tell your children/grandchildren anything what they did and said as babies, about your childhood or how you met your one true love, what you know about how your parents and grandchildren lived, why you keep the things your mother valued, nothing at all about any existence before this very minue - and don't have any opinions about this very minute either! Just shred yourself as soon as you can after you are born and don't go to all the trouble of living.

What a dismal view of social history, family continuity, and emotional attachments! A country that forgets its history is doomed to repeat it, and a family with no group family history (with tangible, viewable evidence, if possible) has shallow roots.

BlueBelle Fri 28-Nov-25 08:16:25

Absolutely the worst advice ever goldieoldie how can you just chuck someone's life away without a care, very harsh way of thinking just wipe someone’s life out in a shredder
Hopefully your advice will fall on deaf ears

Goldieoldie15 Fri 28-Nov-25 08:00:30

1. Buy a powerful shredder (Amazon £90).
2. Hire a skip.
3. And now breathe……

Etoile2701 Thu 27-Nov-25 18:28:44

Suzieque66

Chuck it all away ...

That's harsh 😕

suelld Thu 27-Nov-25 17:57:17

BlueBelle

Oh please please don’t chuck them away as the first answering post suggests that’s awful the poor lady sounds very very talented with very artistic leanings if any have local interest (paintings etc) try a local museum maybe or art group
If her designs were used commercially maybe the company who commissioned them would like them
We are not talking about a bit of old tat your mother in law sounds very artistic and clever
Please don’t just chuck until you ve looked into alternatives

Yes agree with BlueBelle.
If you have the original designs along with the stamps and pillowcases they would be well worth saving …for future family or if family uninterested they would make nice Auction lots. A lot of interest in original artwork as said above.
MOST first day covers fetch little nowadays, tho there are exceptions… worth checking.
First …ask family if interested. If not take to Auction house and ask for advice. Mind you there are Auction Houses and Auction Houses! If you can research them find ones specialising in the arts …take pics of the items and send with info on the designers…. See what they say?

GolferGrandma Thu 27-Nov-25 17:54:57

I have recently been trying to sort out loads of ?rubbish? - photos, collections, old memorabilia from parents, as neither offspring will be interested, DH can’t understand my efforts, but as I have a terminal illness I know someone will end up having to do it.
There is a collection of Lilliput Lane houses no one will want, too many and too good for charity shop, I have no idea what to do with them. Many excess ornaments, clothing, unused gifts, etc I have already given to charity shop. Still to sort through books, CD’s, and DVD’s.
I have quite an extensive Swarovski collection which has annual Christmas stars from 2000 to present. I have identified 6 for the GC birth years and each of D and S wedding years, clearly written with a photo, each for a Christmas ornament on their tree in my memory and attached to copy will.

Paperbackwriter Thu 27-Nov-25 16:53:38

Some of the more useful items could be advertised on Facebook Marketplace. Many are grateful for things like this.

monami Thu 27-Nov-25 16:19:08

sell them on a site called preloved, its free

Welshy Thu 27-Nov-25 16:10:10

Try selling on eBay. It's free to sell. Mention vintage in the heading.

Maybe look for something similar on there for ideas on pricing.

Grammaretto Thu 27-Nov-25 16:02:46

I have managed to sell some items on gumtree, ebay and Facebook market place.
I check their value first against other similar things.

I have also had valuations from a couple of auction houses but though they were kind and helpful, nothing much that I own is in the right price bracket to make a lot of money.

It is hard and time consuming and a little emotional. You have to be in the right frame of mind.

Otherwise a Charity shop.

If you decide to keep them or some of them, be sure to label everything carefully.
Now to follow my own advice 🤣😂

Jane43 Thu 27-Nov-25 15:53:04

Skydancer

DotScot

Thanks for your responses. Most people seem to be in the 'get rid somehow' camp.
What if I decide to hang on to these things though 'for posterity'? After all, lots of people on programmes like the Antiques Roadshow seem to have held onto less significant items.
I guess a labelled box, one only, with the significance of the items labelled as well, stored with the others is as good a solution as any.

I agree. One of my children is very interested in our ancestors and the other one isn’t. As I have got older I have a real interest in family history which I didn’t have when I was younger.

I have recently started to sort through items I have accumulated over the 60 years since I left home to get married and things given me by my mother. My mother always said she wanted our younger son to have my father’s medals, he was a police officer for 30 years, they have stayed in a box since my mother died in 1994 and I recently honored my mother’s wishes and passed them on to my son. The medals were in a sorry state but my son has cleaned them, got new ribbons and put them in a display case with a picture of my father whom he never knew as he was born two years after my father died. He also has my father’s police whistle and is going to get a display case for that as well. Next year he wants to visit some of the places where my father was stationed, we moved around a lot as every time he was promoted we had to move house. As you say people’s interest in family history can develop over time, I don’t think our son would have been so interested 30 years ago but I am very glad that he is now.

FranP Thu 27-Nov-25 15:46:50

Gran had managed to get rid of much, but mum threw the rest away (I cry about the Claris Cliff that got thrown in the dustbin). She also gave away/threw away things I might have kept before I even got a proper home of my own.

I kept her MacIntosh dining suite after a big fight with DH, and now it is worth a lot more than the £8 the auctioneer gave me for the other bits that he pushed me into getting rid of. each generation hates what went before, but will love the older things. If you have room, box up the future antiques and the precious stuff they designed and made, with what it is, add the descriptions, and if you have photos, to your will, and they can decide after you have gone.

After all, your own furniture is now a "modern vintage" if you bought it in the 80s <lol>

Robin202 Thu 27-Nov-25 15:43:24

When my MIL passed away, we sold a lot of it on Facebook Marketplace - ao if you use the platform, I would suggest it. Take photos with your phone, upload and away you go. The rest I would take to a charity shop and items not suitable foe that, to the dump.
If you have any valuable things, perhaps send them to auction.