Leaving your children alone overnight.

My num died when I was 14 and ny dad was an semi-pro entertainer on the club circuit. I was always left home alone in the evenings on Friday, Saturday and Sunday nights, not all night but until about 2am. When my dad remarried when I was nearly 16 he and my stepmum would go away for a fortnight and I'd be left home. I was sensible and quite enjoyed the responsibility.

We left our son and daughter, 18 and 15, for a couple of nights when DH turned 50. No problems. (Though my parents and sister lived in the same village).
When we came home DD asked 'Did you miss us?' When I replied that I had she said 'Well, we didn't miss you. You can go for longer next time' .

I went to au pair in Austria when I was 17, I'd never been on a plane before. I looked after three under 5s for a very busy professional couple who would leave me with the children " for a couple of hours" then come back next morning. It was a huge responsibility but I coped and it stood me in good stead for university and later, parenthood

Left 17 year old twin boys whilst away to Barbados for a week one December. They had school, plenty of food in fridge and freezer and money left for use if neef be. Both were very capable haf been btought up to cook, use a washine machine, iron own clothes. Had contact addrrss, phone number, had a 19 year old sister who was at Uni in city is needed advice. 9 moths later both boys were away at Uni too. Youngsters are smothered nowadays.

Having left home at 16 to get a job and never returned except to visit, I can't see why a sensible young teenager can't cope perfectly well. I sometimes used to leave my 14 yr old overnight (with a large friendly dog for reassurance) while I stayed with a younger child in hospital. In some countries children younger than this have whole families to look after. I think it depends a lot on the child, I suppose some aren't sensible enough, but overall, 16 or 17 is almost an adult and should be able to fend for themselves.

I joined the WRAF at 17 and loved every minute.

I suspect that the majority of us over 60s were working full time at 15/16 , I myself was working going to work as a temp travelling all over London with an A-Z for directions. I would be appalled if anyone thought any of my children were too immature to be left home alone at 16. Many older people complain that the younger generation are ‘snowflakes’, it’s this helicopter parenting attitude that contributes to this I feel.

Aged 15, I with both my parents full permission, they paid the tickets, travelled alone by plane from Glasgow to Copenhagen to stay with a family for three months and help out as nursemaid to their four little boys.

At 16, I went to finishing school in Copenhagen, for a full academic year, my parents were still living outside Glasgow- the following year I travelled alone to another Danish town to sit the entrance exam for the college I wished to attend to, and then took the train to Hamburg to visit a school-friend who was studying there.

Neither her nor my parents thought we were too young to do any of this, nor did any of my parents' friends voice any concerns.

No young person should leave home at 18 to study if they have never been staying anywhere alone.

All they need to stay alone in their own home for a couple of days, is the phone number to the police, fire brigade and ambulance services and to adult friends of their parents whom they can phone if they become scared or run into problems, plus the sense to keep the house doors locked after dark and to disconnect obscene phone calls pronto.

At sixteen I could have married if I had wanted to. I didn't, but more than once if my mother had popped down to the shops, I answered the phone, and on one occasion was so certain when I heard what was wrong that the patient could not wait until my father came in, that I phoned for an ambulance for the patient - and it transpired I was right to do so.

My 16 year old son went camping with his same age mate for 2 weeks.

I'm 70 now and my sister and I were locked in overnight while both parents worked nightshift together if their shifts clashed. I would have been about 14. Married at 18, mortgage at 19. I think at 16 that's a reasonable age to leave alone overnight, after all you can get a job at that age.

What about small children? We were horrified when visiting friends in Germany, mother a teacher in a grammar school, father an air accident investigator. They were relaxed about leaving their 18-month-old asleep in her cot while we went to their local for a drink. We told them they could be prosecuted in Britain for that, but they seemed to think it was normal.

We do have to parent our teens and prepare them for adult life. They won't wake up on their 18th birthday as responsible adults. Give them confidence and skills and then when you and they are ready let them have the responsibility. Don't let laws parent your teens, let your confidence building skills decide.

Left my daughter for two weeks aged 16 ! All she did wrong was burn the egg poacher ! She didn’t know it required water! She is 45 soon so survived much worse!
I knew I could trust her at 16 ! I was running the home aged 14 as my mum had left and my dad was on shifts ! You have to give young people the opportunity to be responsible and adult !

I started work at 15 years of age so being left at home on my own would not have bothered me. I was quite capable of looking after myself and used to travelling on public transport. I was not nor did I need to be mollycoddled.

I would have happily left my daughter, who is calm and sensible, at home alone from about 16. Not my son though at that age, because he wasn’t. He would have been ringing me in a panic at 2am because he heard (non existent) footsteps downstairs, or flooded the dishwasher, or left the downstairs windows wide open all night . Thankfully he did grow out of that phase.

I think it depends on the individual. My eldest son was grown up at 15 not that I left him but he was so responsible. Still the one I turn to for help and advice.

Me too maria59

Maria59

I got married aged 17

Was that to avoid being left on your own at night

My parents used to regularly leave me home alone for weekends when I was 14,

When I was 18 I lived in an unsupervised student house at University

pably15

we left my daughter and her friend for 2 or 3 nights, they were 17 at the time, the house was tidy when we left, it was absolutely spanking clean when we returned, so we knew they'd had a party ..

who can resist temptation ha ha

The world has changed hugely since most people here were young. Childhood definitely lasts longer now and parents hover protectively over their one or two children differently from when kids roamed freely from five and were having their own babies in their teens.
Some sensible kids would be fine left overnight, preferably with a sibling or friend, at about fifteen. They all have mobile phones to stay in touch.

When I was teaching we would often hear from Sixth formers about parties being planned when parents were away. Sometimes we heard about the aftermath- too many friends, drinks cabinets raided, bathrooms trashed. Not the fault of the girl left alone ? Well she may not have done the damage but she did let her friends know that her parents were going to be away.

I hitchhiked alone round Brittany aged 19 for a week with a rucksack and a map. I already had hitch hiked in the UK at 18 and found out how to avoid the subject or idea of sex coming up.
I think Dad would have had a fit if he had known, I was supposed to be staying with French friends.

I do admire those of you who had a child that early.
I wasn't mature enough in the ways that really matter for that, most definitely.

I had my first child at 20. Only3 years on from 17. At 17 you are not a child.

I left my 16 year old alone for nearly a week. Emergency phone call that sibling had been blue lighted to hospital with meningitis in first term at uni. I rang school to check he had his key, left him some cash and left. He was fine.