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Not using any modern technology!

(122 Posts)
NanKate Sun 29-Mar-26 12:34:13

I am so frustrated with a friend I used to work with.

She is 88, mobile, but uses absolutely NO modern technology. She lives with her husband who is 93. He does still drive rather erratically down to the supermarket once a week and that’s it.

I took her out to coffee last week and she was so depressed because she felt trapped at home and her husband who has walking difficulties won’t use his walking frame, other than when they have an occasional Coach Holiday.

They are members of the U3A but I doubt they are too involved. Last year she was offered basic lessons in using an iPhone. I encouraged her to participate as it would be a good way to contact her. She gave up after a while and she is still an intelligent woman imo. I do leave messages on her telephone answering machine, but she doesn’t always pick them up.

I suggested they went to our local Everyman cinema which caters for people with walking problems. They have a Blue Badge and the cinema is close to the car park. She said she would like to, but doesn’t know the films that are on, as she doesn’t use the Internet!

She said she would come with me to the cinema, so I hope to find an appropriate film and if she decides after that she won’t go again at least I have tried.

My sister who lives in Italy is just as bad at not using modern technology.

I do hope this is the last generation to live this way

NanKate Mon 30-Mar-26 21:40:10

I’m taking my friend to our new cinema on Wednesday to help avoid the depression she is sinking into. She said she would like to come with me. My DH has typed up a list of how to book, collect and use our cinema and even where the loos are. If after all that she and her DH decide not to use the cinema, then we will have tried our best to help them.

On the way there I am walking her through Wetherspoons to show her how that works.

I’ll let you know how it goes.

watermeadow Mon 30-Mar-26 20:40:14

My iPad is an absolute essential to me but I hate telephones. I buy most things on-line but don’t bank that way. I don’t want to know how technology works and just use what I need.
I have a friend who has never had a computer or tablet so I have never sent her a photograph since I gave up films and processing twenty five years ago.

M0nica Mon 30-Mar-26 20:29:03

Some years ago my aunt paid money into a bank over the counter and it was stolen. She had used a paying in slip that you used to get in the bank and the clerk, must have screwed it up and pocketed the cash .

I have been shopping online for 30 years. My first purchase was a replacement zip from a store somewhere in the USA. I could not get a zip the right length in the UK. In all that time I have never been scammed or cheated, although one company went bust and failed to deliver the goods, but you do not need to go online for that to happen. I do not shop at Amazon, except for Kindle books, but that is because of Bezos and Amazon's determination to avoid paying taxes at all costs. Pay through PayPal on occasion but generally do not because it limits my consumers rights. Nothing they do, but it means my contract to buy a product is with Paypal, not the supplier so I cannot claim if the supplier ;ets me down.

In other words no system is perfect and all are capable of misuse. I do not adopt all technology as it comes. I bank online but I do not have any banking apps on my phone.

I commend your caution WithNobsOn but for someone as level headed as you are, I think you are being unnecessarily cautious, Luddite is probably the right word to describe you.

WithNobsOnIt Mon 30-Mar-26 19:08:01

Further to my last post. Thought you may be interested in the sort of quillmpen l use

The cheaper ones are made from horrible Turkey feathers..But Goose are better and Swan is definitely the best.

🦃🪶✒️🪿🪽😻

Mojack26 Mon 30-Mar-26 18:26:41

I don't get people like that???? Why are they refusing to live in the modern world? Even my dad who was 93 when he died a few years ago was always wantung to learn and try to use technology. I would hateto have to rely on other people all the time. Things are not going to go back to the way they want. They will become very isolated and are making a rod for their own back. I do however have a friend 72 refuses to use internet banking or usedirect debit or pay bills online. Insists on going into the bank to pay bills etcNothing you can do.

WithNobsOnIt Mon 30-Mar-26 18:23:12

I don't have an online bank account..l will not do online banking as it simply isn't safe enough.. But do pay all utilities etc by Direct Debit.

Also use my bank card to pay for things in shops who l have used for years.

Will.buy stuff from sites l trust like Argos and over the phone to Bon Marche on a click and collect basis,,delivery to their local stores.

So l.still.have on old fashioned current bank account. With a monthly paper statement and a bank card which l use at a local ATM to get cash.

The nearest branch of mt bank is early five miles away.

Will not use PayPal or shop.at Amazon.

Still use an Abacus,paper and a quill.pen.

Signed
An Old Fashioned Luddite
👍🗽🛒🪙🧮🗒️

valdavi Mon 30-Mar-26 18:06:09

Targeting something like quantum computing would seem to make sense then - but in a democracy you've always got to be chasing votes & getting people onside, so niche, elite fields can lose out.

We need to invest in the job-creators and the niche imo.

petra Mon 30-Mar-26 18:00:40

valdavi

friendlygingercat

This thread reminds me of how some people feel hatred and resentment towards AI.

Back in the late 1980s when I was researching my Masters I was teaching sdult evening classes in a local collece. Many of the students had never used a computer and some of them were actually very anxious about "pressing the srong button". They were learning basic functions like database and word processing. It was teaching these students and watching how they interacted with the machines which lured me into the multi faceted world of human computer interaction.

It led me into a Ph.D on a similar topic of how libgrary users tackled various tasks on a computerised library cartalogue. Some of the philosophican aspects of the subject lie at the foundations of AI. This probably explains why I am so fascinated with AI and teaching my graduate students how to use it as a tool.

I wish we had AI when I was doing my Ph.D. It would have made it so much easier to assemble all that information.

I use AI.

I accept it's going to expand, so glad that the UK are staking a claim to R&D in AI.

However it scares me, and although I know it's like King Canute trying to stem the tide, I would be happy if we could say 'thus far, no further' and freeze things now.

The trouble is we are not investing enough.
Listening to a program a few days ago Re quantum computing.
We are thought of as the best in the world!!!
Who is the largest investor: Japan. Then all that knowledge will probably go to the us.

petra Mon 30-Mar-26 17:52:27

Peaseblossom

AI is a scary curse. It makes people redundant among other things.

I can’t agree with the scary curse because I know how much good it’s doing in the medical world.
As for the posters I’ve been aware of this coming emergency ( water shortage) for many years.
I assume you don’t have thousands of pictures that you’ll never see again stored in the cloud.
Having said that there has been a lot of new technology enabling cloud hubs to recycle the water.
I do believe that AI will create jobs.
A whole different world is coming down the line.

valdavi Mon 30-Mar-26 17:47:47

friendlygingercat

This thread reminds me of how some people feel hatred and resentment towards AI.

Back in the late 1980s when I was researching my Masters I was teaching sdult evening classes in a local collece. Many of the students had never used a computer and some of them were actually very anxious about "pressing the srong button". They were learning basic functions like database and word processing. It was teaching these students and watching how they interacted with the machines which lured me into the multi faceted world of human computer interaction.

It led me into a Ph.D on a similar topic of how libgrary users tackled various tasks on a computerised library cartalogue. Some of the philosophican aspects of the subject lie at the foundations of AI. This probably explains why I am so fascinated with AI and teaching my graduate students how to use it as a tool.

I wish we had AI when I was doing my Ph.D. It would have made it so much easier to assemble all that information.

I use AI.

I accept it's going to expand, so glad that the UK are staking a claim to R&D in AI.

However it scares me, and although I know it's like King Canute trying to stem the tide, I would be happy if we could say 'thus far, no further' and freeze things now.

Peaseblossom Mon 30-Mar-26 17:37:59

AI is a scary curse. It makes people redundant among other things.

LadyGaGa Mon 30-Mar-26 16:06:46

Bluebelle, my sister in law refused to have a microwave when they first came out because she she didn’t want the ‘rays’ around her and thought it was unsafe! She’s a young 74, but has always stuck to her guns and would still never buy one. She also distrusts Air Fryers and just says that they don’t cook ‘her kind of food’. Even a Kindle is too new fangled 😂 I’m all for embracing anything that enhances my life or makes it easier!

AuntieE Mon 30-Mar-26 16:05:58

I am at a loss to understand why this bothers you.

It is surely up to every one of us to decide how much modern technology we can and will invest time and money in.

I use a computer, the Internet and an Android phone, bank online, pay bills by direct debit and do quite a lot of shopping online.

However, I have never bothered to find out if Instagram would be of use or interest to me, have never watched much TV and and never learned to drive - and that last is the only thing I regret.

If it annoys you that others don't use the Internet, but rely on you to do so for them, then I understand your annoyance, but you can simply tell them that you do not have the time to help them. Or do as I do in similar cases, regret I have not time to do all this for them, but offer to teach them how to do it for themselves. After making the offer, none of them have taken me up on it, or pestered me to sort things out for them.

I think online banking, shopping etc. are great, but of others don't , well that is their business, not mine.

friendlygingercat Mon 30-Mar-26 15:56:47

This thread reminds me of how some people feel hatred and resentment towards AI.

Back in the late 1980s when I was researching my Masters I was teaching sdult evening classes in a local collece. Many of the students had never used a computer and some of them were actually very anxious about "pressing the srong button". They were learning basic functions like database and word processing. It was teaching these students and watching how they interacted with the machines which lured me into the multi faceted world of human computer interaction.

It led me into a Ph.D on a similar topic of how libgrary users tackled various tasks on a computerised library cartalogue. Some of the philosophican aspects of the subject lie at the foundations of AI. This probably explains why I am so fascinated with AI and teaching my graduate students how to use it as a tool.

I wish we had AI when I was doing my Ph.D. It would have made it so much easier to assemble all that information.

petra Mon 30-Mar-26 15:53:53

WinterWhite
I wanted to see how old your phone is.
Some confusion 🥴 Apple don’t make an iPhone S20 but there is a Samsung Galaxy S20.
If you do get a new phone by an iPhone and that will sync with your iPad, it is an iPad, isn’t it 😂

Missedout Mon 30-Mar-26 15:44:06

I have been experimenting with Google Voice Access on my Android (Samsung) phone and watch. This is on behalf of a friend who has poor sight. It works very well although you have to speak clearly and know some of the key words such as ‘Call’ instead of phone, ‘Text’ instead of WhatsApp (you are offered the choice between SMS and WhatsApp).
It is also important that your contacts list is precise, if you use nicknames, they also need to be included as part of the contact name otherwise the contact is not recognised. However, you can also read out just the phone number if you know it..
Those who struggle because of problems with their hands or vision but are willing to use technology may find this a helpful application.

crazyH Mon 30-Mar-26 15:38:42

She has no children and no close family.

crazyH Mon 30-Mar-26 15:37:25

I have a friend like that. No modern technology - even her phone is the basic 1970s model- no hands free. So, if she’s in the garden, she’s unable to hear it ringing. And, it’s located in the hallway - she lives on her own. If, for whatever reason , she takes ill in the night, I don’t know how she will get to the phone. All her neighbours are concerned.
She is however, a very fit 86year old.

winterwhite Mon 30-Mar-26 15:24:47

Petra
Thanks again. Never noticed the App logo before. I’m not really competent, paddling furiously below the water.

win Mon 30-Mar-26 15:21:29

silverlining48

Well that’s me told …. I don’t think many of us ‘old people’ think it’s clever and sorry you think we are pathetic, but ‘applying oneself’ without help or guidance isn’t easy.

There is so much guidance available out there. Go to your library, to U3A to any club and they will have free tech advice as they all get grants for these things.

Jojo1950 Mon 30-Mar-26 15:00:53

Agree! At 76 I wouldn’t want to give up on learning new things. Love tech. However illness has held me back for a while! 🙏🏻

cc Mon 30-Mar-26 14:46:20

My husband is pretty stubborn about using technology, quite ridiculous really when he was a civil engineer and has used computers all his working life.
I've got him using a mobile now as he realised he needed it for banking, but he seldom checks his email and even less rarely his WhatsApp.
He won't use the computer for letters, so I end up doing them, and won't even type a long email - preferring to give me a written note to type up for him.

alisonsmith4 Mon 30-Mar-26 14:44:08

I am 75 and pretty tech savvy. Like it or not we HAVE to embrace this way of doing things if we don’t want to be left behind or reliant on others. If previous generations didn’t adapt to new discoveries we would all still be writing on cave walls!

Sago Mon 30-Mar-26 13:42:02

winterwhite

My problem is that mobile phones are so small. My ancient fingers fumble with it and my ancient eyes find it hard to read what it's telling me.

And there is big difference between being 73 and being 93. People now in their late '80s and '90s. People now in their 90s may well have retired before the internet was invented and it's at work that people often first learn about new tech.

Those now urging new tech on us all will find when they're 80 that everything has changed from when they were 50 and they are left behind in their turn.

An iPhone has the ability to increase text size.
Also you can talk in texts, emails etc.

Charleygirl5 Mon 30-Mar-26 13:33:33

I lost my debit card days ago. It was great requesting another and cancelling the lost one sitting at home with a coffee in my hand. No traipsing to my bank.

Reading how others cope, I am more tech savvy than I thought.

My smartphone, android, is beyond me but if somebody spent 30 minutes teaching me, it would make a difference and at 82. part of my brain is still working.