Gransnet forums

Chat

Elderly people getting married

(17 Posts)
NotSpaghetti Fri 28-Aug-26 22:44:36

If my mother-in-law had remarried at 80 she would still have had a twenty year plus marriage!

Who knows how long this one may last.

Ladyleftfieldlover Fri 28-Aug-26 22:27:40

A friend of mine who had been widowed over 30 years before remarried at 82 to a guy 10 years younger, who had never been married before. Seven years on he still looks shell shocked.

Charleygirl5 Fri 28-Aug-26 22:08:28

At that age I think getting married for companionship and friendship is a lovely idea. I personally wouldn't want to do it as I have been on my own for so long (1988).

Grammaretto Fri 28-Aug-26 22:05:58

A couple I know were married last year. Both are in their 80s. It's her 3rd marriage, his first. They appear blissfully happy. I often see them out and about together.

Graphite Fri 28-Aug-26 22:00:20

I agree, Luckygirl, but you can be happy as a couple without getting married so I can understand why others might question motive.

I haven't seen the discussion so I don't know any more detail, if indeed it was given.

MissAdventure Fri 28-Aug-26 21:55:42

I can't believe that offspring have ever been afforded such perceived control of their parents lives.

I find it shocking, and disgusting, frankly.

Luckygirl3 Fri 28-Aug-26 21:52:05

I do not think inheritance is what matters here. It is the happiness of the person involved (who has been widowed for 10 years) and her right to choose what she does with her life ... what is left of it.

Oldnproud Fri 28-Aug-26 21:39:26

Well, I have to be honest, and this will probably go completely against the grain, but if my own mum had decided to remarry in her 80s, after my dad's death, i too would have been horrified.

It's not that I have anything against people of any age starting new relationships, but I feel that remarrying at that age if you have a close family is extremely likely to cause upset.

It's a personal thing, but in my case would have nothing to do with any potential inheritance.

Graphite Fri 28-Aug-26 21:37:34

Maybe it's for reasons to do with tax and pension inheritance.

blog.moneysavingexpert.com/2025/01/martin-lewis--the-nine-big-financial-benefits-of-being-married/

MissAdventure Fri 28-Aug-26 21:34:05

Married, in the "full sense of the word" (said in a Les Dawson-esque manner) smile

Luckygirl3 Fri 28-Aug-26 21:32:13

Interestingly I posted the opinion that she has the right to make her own choices and it has received 10 "likes" so it is good to know that ageism is not the default position.

JoyBloggs Fri 28-Aug-26 21:30:22

MissAdventure

I'd be hoping for all the trimmings!!!
grin

grin grin grin

Redrobin51 Fri 28-Aug-26 21:28:03

My uncle after my aunty died went into a care home. He met a lady there who was widowed and a year later they got married. They had a couple of happy years together before one of them died. I would have been very happy if my mother had remarried. My sisters law has just got engaged to a lovely man and she is 77. People get lonely at any age and crave companionship.

MissAdventure Fri 28-Aug-26 21:16:12

I'd be hoping for all the trimmings!!!
grin

Desdemona Fri 28-Aug-26 21:13:43

Marrying at that age would only be for some sort of financial advantage wouldnt it?

Grannybags Fri 28-Aug-26 21:10:36

They're worried about the inheritance!!

Luckygirl3 Fri 28-Aug-26 21:04:41

There is a fascinating thread on mumsnet about a woman whose mother is planning to remarry at 80. Shock and horror is being expressed!

It slightly makes me chuckle as it reminds me of us as parents worrying about their child's choice of partner.

Slightly worrying that the general opinion is that the poster knows best and should be dissuading her mother ... who clearly has no idea of her own mind!