Good morning Michael and all GN's on a damp still morning in North Yorkshire, I am already up and dressed, as I have an early dentists appointment . This week has been absolutely nothing like normal, and it continues! I had been to the dentists, because I knew it was well over 6 months, since the last visit but couldnt remember the actual date. It turned out that I was well overdue, and so today was booked.
Well it is difficult enough, but the dentist I knew and trusted has left, so starting with a new person means added stress anyway, However I awarded myself a goldstar for making an appointment and knew there is a feeling of something a bit odd , which needs to be checked out. But now of course, with all the happenings of this last week, I will get to see her, but she will not be doing anything today. I cannot risk having anything unnecessary done, as I am still battling with the cellulitis etc.
Well, another day that did not go according to plan yesterday. However, at least the brain is in gear, and I of course see so many jobs not done and wondering how I didnt notice this and that before! Physically not good for most of the day, with my leg, and back, were constantly nagging at me, but mentally thank god, I was at last in charge. So I actually did manage to get a few things done.
I left early, expecting to be back to read more posts and catch up, but the day developed in a different way. One of the main things I had to do was to get fuel for the car, and as it was getting right down, and I do not totally trust the gauge which sometimes shows a quarter and then rapidly drops to zero, I decided that I would kill two birds with one stone and go to Thirsk , where the Tesco garage are very helpful to me and I show my blue badge and give a little tap on the horn and they come out to me. Standing still putting fuel in is always painful at the best of times, and I wasnt wanting to do it myself. So once the lady had come out and started filling it up, I slowly hobbled to the shop bit to pay, and was so slow I was only just entering the door when she arrived back from filling it . Oh cringe the cost had gone up to 160p a litre and I can see that I shall be checking on the bus pass and only venturing down the town on the yellow peril!
Well I was pleased to feel that the car was a bit more ready for action and have got the picnic box into autumn mode, and checked that my bright yellow jacket is at the ready inside the car for the darker days. There was some shopping I could have done, but suddenly remembered that I had said I would go to a meeting that afternoon and decided that I needed to take things steady ( I do take note of your comments ) and decided that I would instead go and buy my bread and then descend upon Cafe Nero, where I would have a much needed coffee and a rest in a chair that didnt hurt my back so much.
Had forgotten it was market day, and had quite a struggle to get parked anywhere near Neros, but had to just hang around, until there was a space, not a cat in hells chance of walking over the cobbles and uneven pavement in the state I was in, but ah at last, I arrived with bone china mug at the ready.
The staff who know me quite well, had seen me hobbling in and called to me to choose a seat and they would come over to me. What bliss!, I found a chair that was comfortable for me, carefully lowered myself into it, and by the time I was sat down , the kind staff were at my side and took my mug and I decided to have a treat so ordered , of course, my favourite apricot croissant, to be warmed and the coffee to come with it. Ah what bliss , to sit in relative comfort and anticipate my treat.
A lovely friendly little dog was watching my every movement whilst eating the croissant, her tail wagging and that way they have of sitting but sort of fidgeting at the same time, and looking in hopes of a treat. She kept shuffling towards me and the gentleman who she belonged to , told her off and went to pull her away, but I said she was very well behaved and no bother.
We got talking , first of the price of the fuel at the moment, and then onto various other things, finding we had quite a lot in common, as he was also a teacher and a linguist, and had lived out in some of the places I had been. It was rather nice to chat to someone who knew areas I had been in and as he was younger than me , he had been there later than I had, and so I quite enjoyed hearing of the changes that had happened and he seemed quite eager to hear of various dictators, who had been around when I was abroad.
Well , he eventually went, saying he would look out for me again in Neros and that he had enjoyed our talk, as there were few people who he could talk to about such things. I also enjoyed the meeting and felt much refreshed by the whole encounter, but due to that I decided not to go to the meeting . I hadnt committed myself ,it was just something I thought of doing, but now was feeling that having as much rest as I could and allowing myself to just stop was more important.
I find that when situations arise unexpectedly I can deal with whatever I have to - well no choice really - but I hate that being out of control situation, where you cannot plan in advance and are not actually the person who is in charge of what happens next. That makes me tense up and spend ages thinking if this then that , and what about the other? This all goes on inside my head , but outwardly I appear to be dealing with things ok. But whilst I can tell myself that it is ok now to relax, my body takes its own time to relax. I have never found any way of forcing things, just have to wait for it to improve by themselves.
Meandering my way home I decided to nip into my local smaller tesco for a few necessary bits whilst I was out. Actually for once, I was able to get several things that had been out of stock, and had to buy an extra bag as I only had one with me. Then I went home, and couldnt park close to the flat, so just got the frozen bits and one or two important things and left the rest to get out this morning. Then I did very little, just made the most of some king prawns I had bought in the bargain box and got some sticky rice done and had a very simple prawn feast with just soy sauce, not all the usual concoction I tend to make. So was quite happy to be a slob and listen to radio three and then watch vigil, surrounded by shopping and mess waiting to be attended to, but which I calmly ignored and went off to bed, only suddenly remembering that it was the bin men today, and so had to get out, stick dressing gown on and collect up all the rubbish and go out and stick it in the shed.
So have heard my beloved Bach and the sky is lightening up and a very slight breeze now, but there is definitely that sense of it being an autumn morning today. My son is 51 today, sent him a happy birthday email as I dont know where he is at the moment, but will hopefully speak to him this evening. He started his new job yesterday, so fingers crossed that it all went well and he will settle in there well. Ah we never change do we? Our children are always our children to us, no matter what they do or where they go, we can still worry about them, hoping they are eating well, getting enough sleep etc etc!
Well ladies and gentlemen, I am starting to feel rather anxious, despite knowing she wont be doing anything today, and so need to gather my bags and bits, so that I can go on to do various necessary things afterwards. I cant concentrate until I have this out of the way, so mundane jobs are quite good for now, and will get the washing up done and the bed made so that hopefully I shall return to a better looking flat and then I shall be going back to read all the missed bits of news from you all and then I need to concentrate on doing some paperwork and finding documents , which hopefully I shall be in a better frame of mind to do later.
Wishing you all a good start to your day, and may we all have an improving day. At least I feel in a better state of mind, and whilst my leg isnt doing much better it is no worse ,so at least I am only stationary, not going backwards. I am going to be more positive and book my rail trip in advance to get a cheaper fare. I could have done it a week ago, but with all the things happening I didnt feel sure that it was worth it, so I must be feeling more positive now. Onward and upward as they say. Have a good day
