Good morning Michael and all GN's on a very dark and still morning in North Yorkshire. I have tottered up about 4am, and am finally having to accept that yes I am old now !! What a day I had yesterday, and am definitely paying for it today.
So after all my efforts to organise something else, I ended up deciding that the only thing I could do was to go by train, and then bus or taxi if necessary to the hospital. Having checked the times I didnt want to risk going for the 9.08 in case of delays and made up my mind to take the 8.08, allowing me plenty of time to arrive at the hospital. Not sleeping well and having quite a bit of pain does have the occasional advantage and so the fact that I was awake about 4,30am allowed me to get up showered and ready at a steady pace and then set off about 7.15am to walk to the station, as I knew it would be quite a hard walk for me, further than I usually attempt without using the buggy etc. So arrived at the station, spoke to the very nice young man and bought my ticket, and as I had to go to the other platform, arranged for him to take me in their electric chair. This he duly did and I was able to sit in the waiting room there. I was in plenty of time and he said that he would return when the train was due and ensure I got on ok. I had thought carefully and dressed for visiting a hospital. They are always so warm in inner waiting rooms so it was a matter of layers. cotton trousers and top with my very lightweight cashmere sweater plus a mac etc etc, and of course all my various glasses etc . I felt very edgy about the actual appointment but pleased that I had got to the station ok etc. Huh!! Not long before the train was due, there was an announcement that the train had not even left York as some b...... person had stolen copper piping from the signal areas and so that the trains were not just running late but at that time not running at all!! So with endless repeats of the same information I sat there from about 7.30 until gone 9.15 when the next train that was going to middlesborough , but was also late arrived. In the meantime I had texted the eye department to tell them of my delay and that I would be getting there asap. Finally got into very crowded train, loos out of order, general grumpiness of many passengers etc. and finally got to middlesborough and had to take a taxi, or after all that I would miss my appointment.
Somewhat shattered, by now thirsty and hungry, I got to the department and then sat waiting until they began the procedures , where it was that in and out , wait here, have drops, sit there, go to this room and then that room. Added to that was of course the wretched machines where you have to lean at a very painful angle to put your head on the correct rest etc. By the end of it all I was in so much pain, slightly naseaus from lack of food and just some cold water to drink.
The staff were very pleasant and the doctor thorough, but although at the moment there is no problem with my sight and I can drive ok and use my glasses there is something which is showing up, and I have got all the details and information to look at and I intend to discuss it with the diabetic nurse and the doctors before making my mind up what I feel is the best thing to do. So I finally left at just after 1pm feeling exhausted and somewhat depressed. I struggled to walk to the exit and had to wear my sunglasses as of course,when they dilate your pupils , sun can be very painful to see.
I did feel at least relieved that I had after all the hassle got there and not missed my appointment, and then decided that no way was I going to attempt to return on the train, and got a bus to Redcar, which was the next bus going by. I had thought I might go on to Saltburn to calm down and enjoy the sea a bit , but once I was off the bus , knew that my back wouldnt let me do much. So it was a matter of finding a cafe and g etting a much needed coffee and sandwich. as I was feeling quite shaky as well.
Once I had eaten and had a drink, I felt a bit better, but then went to the bus stop to check on ways to get back home. Someone told me that I needed to go to Middlesborough main bus station and change there and then get a bus to Stokesly and then another bus home. Well after various shenanigans I finally got to the main bus stop here and then had a hard walk right from the other end of town and arrived home at 6.55pm!! I felt so shattered and dirty and weary that I just lay on the bed for about 20 minutes before I could even start to do anything, and was deciding what mattered most,to get a shower or get something to eat. The shower won and I had a longer than usual one to not only feel cleaner but to help my back. Having had a shower in the morning, why is it that after a trip to a hospital,which should of course be very clean, you always feel so grubby and sweaty?
Anyway , after a weary showering and then various bits and pieces to eat, too tired and too much pain to stand up for long, I just sat and watched some tv. Hence this morning,I have begun by getting the washing in, and after this will be slowly try to restore some order to the chaos. This is were you have to accept you are getting old. My brain is well aware of what jobs need doing, but my body is struggling to just plod along, without having anything extra to do.
So I need to be kind to myself, and bless the fact that I bought the yellow peril, as that will allow me to go to Tesco etc and get a bit stocked up. I also intend to award myself a very decent coffee in Cafe Nero and hope to see a few friends to chat to, and help the recovery and the processing of the information I have been given. As far as I can remember at the moment, I dont have any appointments or specific things I have to do this morning thank goodness. So slowly slowly, I hope to catch up with things, recover a bit of energy, and let all the information percolate through my brain, before I go to the library etc and do some checking up. I shall return to read your posts and thank you all for the kind messages you sent me , I wish a pleasant day to you all, with successful plans and happy meetings with friends and relatives.
