When did it get so complicated?

Butter shouldn't be given to people who are lactose intolerant. Lactose is in anything milk-related. Intolerance will not kill you, so perhaps your DD has decided to put up with the effects. I would rather be well, personally.

If you have invited people to lunch, shouldn't you expect to give them something they can eat? If you have someone who cannot digest certain foods (which is what food intolerance means), it's probably better to ask them what they can have. They may well suggest bringing something with them. Those lactose intolerant can often eat vegan puddings as they don't use milk (animal product), but you would have to check the other ingredients. If it has a base you may be running into wheat/gluten problems. In the case of the quiche suggested by the OP for her guests sounds ok for their needs but would not be ok for anyone with gluten/wheat or lactose problems. You could make one crustless tart, but those lactose-intolerant guests would still be unable to eat it. Onions are my "most likely to send me to sleep while driving home" foods because of the very hight level of the "wrong" sort of sugars in them. I wouldn't eat them, although I would look longingly in their direction.

Somebody suggested strawberries, I think. It wouldn't solve your problems with me, I'm afraid, but a small portion of raspberries and some lactose-free (probably vegan) ice cream would.

You may think this is difficult for one day, and I do appreciate the OP's guests have all chosen their way of eating and will neither die nor be ill if something creeps in. But those of us who don't have a choice a) like being as well as possible as often as possible and b) probably won't come unless they know you very, very well because we know what a pain we are

I'll avoid serving shellfish too 🙂

Dh is severely allergic to shellfish.

Fleurpepper

Callistemon21

I think butter is ok, at least my lactose-intolerant DD eats butter without a problem.
So a good old crumble with gf flour, not too much sugar in case anyone is diabetic, no nuts just in case .....

Butter is not OK for vegans, for sure, or plant based.

We have one GC who is severely allergic to egg, and this makes things complicated enough. But they eat everything as long as no trace of egg.

No, I wouldn't give butter to a vegan!
But it contains very little lactose so is usually ok for lactose-intolerant people.

Oh yes - eggs!

Right, everyone, here's a nice undressed salad, I've all labelled the ingredients on everything else, help yourself!!

I think if it's a lifestyle choice then fine, but if it's food intolerance eg nuts, sesame seeds, or an auto-immune disease eg coeliac disease etc then you have to cater for that.

Someone could be very ill or die if they ate the wrong food.

Bringing something you can eat is fine but if you invite someone it's good to make an effort ' or provide something readymade.

One year I had someone who was gluten free and is also diabetic. Staying for several days. Coming from abroad so not used to english food. Several people here also.
It was a matter of working out what he could actually eat.

Riverwalk

Visgirl and hollysteers - yers don't sound very hospitable!

I’m hospitable, but if you have food problems, look out for yourself.

How about saying I will be cooking x, y, z. If this is not OK for you, we would love your company, but bring something you can eat?

Callistemon21

I think butter is ok, at least my lactose-intolerant DD eats butter without a problem.
So a good old crumble with gf flour, not too much sugar in case anyone is diabetic, no nuts just in case .....

Butter is not OK for vegans, for sure, or plant based.

We have one GC who is severely allergic to egg, and this makes things complicated enough. But they eat everything as long as no trace of egg.

Purpledaffodil

I sympathise. My hardest ever Christmas catering involved a vegan, a Muslim, someone with a nut allergy and another with an alcohol allergy. I discovered how much Christmas food revolves around meat, especially pork, nuts and booze! Challenging!

At our veggie Christmas dinner we had homemade nut roast, Quorn roast and veggie haggis. The nut roast can be made vegan. Much of the Quorn range is vegan, but I'm not certain that includes the roast. I know the Quorn chicken slices are though.

Visgirl and hollysteers - yers don't sound very hospitable!

Thank god all of my family eat meat and traditional roasts with lots of veg.
And a good old home made apple crumble and custard/ice-cream.

Oh, I feel for you. My son has just announce in the last year that he has probably always been dairy intolerant, but just didn't realize until he stopped. His fiance rarely eats gluten or dairy, and has a peanut allergy.

So cooking for me has gotten more complicated, but not impossible. If I were you I think I would throw my hands in that air and give up. I'm assuming both the vegetarians and vegans don't eat eggs?

I think butter is ok, at least my lactose-intolerant DD eats butter without a problem.
So a good old crumble with gf flour, not too much sugar in case anyone is diabetic, no nuts just in case .....

Dairy free is difficult as well, think of puddings that are dairy free and I refuse to cook with margarine with palm oil.

Fleurpepper

The new thing is '100%' plant based!

Available in all good supermarkets!
M&S has a good range.

You can cheat very successfully now.

Not in our house it's not.

Alcohol in cooking is ok if the alcohol is burned off according to a recovering alcoholic of my acquaintance

I would just but something suitable for the Vegan, and Vegetarian, life's too short and just cater for the other 8.

kittylester

Er, you forgot me! I'm gluten intolerant so can't eat any of your tarts or quiches.

Yes, I make most things gf free now, it's easier.
But we do have lemon tart for pudding tomorrow so will just fruit do for you, kittylester?

That's reminded me to take berries out of the freezer

The new thing is '100%' plant based!

I wouldn’t ask and if they didn’t like it, they could lump it and not eat.

I think an option is to do lovely veg and salads and puds, and find a delicious vegan main for all. Cheese and bikkies on the side.

I'd ask someone with other special needs if they could just bring a "main" they can eat so's you "feel safe not harming them and lots of delish stuff to go with"

I do think it's been like this (quietly) for years though.
My parents had Muslim friends and vegetarian ones as well as a recovering alcoholic friend and one who couldn't go near shellfish.

I suppose in the "old days" we just didn't eat what we didn't want. I didn't ever really like meat so just avoided it where possible. It was the 1970s before I knew what vegetarian rennet was.
We know more now.

I hope everyone eats pastry! 😂

I sympathise. My hardest ever Christmas catering involved a vegan, a Muslim, someone with a nut allergy and another with an alcohol allergy. I discovered how much Christmas food revolves around meat, especially pork, nuts and booze! Challenging!