The Alphabet Bar ( all welcome!)

Emergency! 999! Police!

Oh! Hang on Doodle, that's not a burglar, thats lemon trying to hide her 13 fingers and 3 ears! Nah! It's fine!

Don’t move anyone we’re being held up ? I’ve just encountered someone in a balaclava trying to get at the till. He’s wearing gloves so as not to leave fingerprints. Call PC Plod chewy I’ll try and catch him in this big net.?

Can't you count your own toes? You've got 6 on one foot and 7 on the other. And the same in fingers. And 3 ears. Other than that, you're the spitting image of limegrass. Just keep your mittens and socks on, and always wear that balaclava I knitted for you.

Burt Baccarach on the juke box.

Ah, the old toe giveaway! ?Is that six in total or on each foot?

Zzzzzz that old chestnut again lemon

Look! We know it was you because limegrass has only 5 toes and you have 6. That's how we can tell you apart!

X rated clothing for all the bar staff.... yep, that will pull in more customers.?

Yes, Limegrove and I are alike, but I am ten years younger.

Well, if you think I'm going to be wearing yards of black pvc you're quite mistaken Carillion hoiks bosoms up. I'm more of a lurex & lycra girl myself.

Under the counter supplies?

Vests a plenty, tassels ? not so many as you would think, black lace was panic bought by somebody resembling Mae West ( so I was told)

soop (S was missing. carillion, keep up ?) please start batch baking some of your delicious pies ?)

‘Under the counter supplies’ might have some carillion ? and while you’re there please could you get some black lace and some red tassels for me. I need to start work on a new outfit. I have a feeling we will be moving into the Dog and Whistle at the end of this thread and I need time to prepare.

Thanks lemon, I've taken that as a yessss! Not that I'm desperate to re-engage with Big Jim more than on an hourly basis you undestand. Will need a uniform for my hat-check role.
Going to the shops tomorrow to see if they sell black PVC by the yardage. Unless Chewy has already bought the job lot.

Really lemon? Where could she possibly be passing from and to dressed like that? It’s a bit too much even for the Argy let alone here. You two are so alike ?

Quackers! The lot of you, that isn’t me, it’s my sister Limegrove, you must remember her from The Argy?
Queer, the amount of people who mistake me for her though.
She’s just passing through, as always so I gave her a job behind the bar.?

Please lemon put your clothes back on. There are sensitive people here (well somewhere). Here soop you can have the elastic out of my knickers. I never wear them anyway.
Queue here to help with the doorman’s strip search. No, queue behind me chewy no queue jumping ?

No! (fummoxed)

OH! Words fail me. I was educated in a convent. I am unfamiliar with such wotsits...

My goodness, I'm tramatised! I will never be able to erase that image from my mind! ?

Looking for safety pins soop? Have a look in lemons ears, nose and other "places of interest"; she's gone gone all punk this weekend. Let's hope it's a passing phase......

Knicker elastic went awol long ago. Any safety pins going beggin'?

Just down to vest and baggy knickers though for Doodle and Chewbacca please!

I think you will all have to be strip searched, including that nice young doorman.

How, in holy hell have all my havana cigars gone awol??

Get real! Carill Expertise, credentials??You came to us from the Rat And Drainpipe saying you would settle for lower pay ( I didn’t enquire there as to why they fired you....and maybe I should have done!)
Still, fair do’s, you were certainly a good scrubber at The Argy, the cellar floor had never sparkled before although the poteen vat was often half empty after your shift down there( not to mention that Big Jim always seemed exhausted.)?
Go on then, will keep your application in mind.

Official application for the coat and hat full-bosomed strumpet reception/person at The Dog And Whistle. lemon

I've been in training and have credentials. My referees are Doodle and Chewy who have both witnessed my expertise, contact them ... on application, you just have to catch them at the right time of day

For goodness sake soop not him ?. I know you’re a tennis fan but we are thinking football here. You know, likes spicey things. Yes him the one one with the earrings and tattoos. That one. On our door as doorman....I can’t believe it ?
Great if we can get him to join us at the Dog and Whistle when we move lemon (that’s if I can get him away from chewy first*) ?