Versatile Verse 3

So have some gaviscon at the ready
With all that booze, might be unsteady

Will also need a good hangover cure

So have some gaviscon at the ready
The acid will rise up quite steady

People below, will not ignore you

People below, will not ignore you
they might complain to the London Eye crew

You might have to make a very quick exit

You might have to make a very quick exit
Be careful of your leg, please don't break it.

Why not try a picnic in Hyde Park

Why not try a picnic in Hyde Park
It’s trees have fairy lights that glow in the dark

Stroll along through Covent Garden

Stroll along through Covent Garden
So many nice things to buy my resolve will have to harden

I've bought all my gifts, but it's all very tempting

I've bought all my gifts, but it's all very tempting
To rest on my laurels and not do anything

But no, I've got the cake to bake

But no, I’ve got the cake to bake
My family expect homemade, they’ll spot a fake

I’ll wrap a tartan ribbon around it and tie a big bow

I'll wrap a tartan ribbon around it and tie a big bow
It will look so good, but it's all for show

The gifts I bought are strewn on the table

The gifts I bought are strewn on the table
A magic set for Ben and a dolls pram for Mabel

Chocolate Santa’s and table crackers

Chocolate Santas and table crackers
With plenty of cheese for the midnight snackers

But maybe this year we'll not add to our curves

But maybe this year we'll not add to our curves
Christmas is strange this year but it needn't aggravate nerves

We'll get in the champers and put on the Zoom

We'll get in the champers and put on the Zoom
Those who don't like zoom can leave the room.

Not everyone likes their face on a screen

Not everyone likes their face on a screen
Unless they've had a wash and a preen

Me? Dont care, just wish someone would call

Me? don’t care, just wish someone would call
The baking and de-cluttering have begun to pall

And Lord help me if I see another jigsaw!

And Lord help me if I see another jigsaw!
Those difficult Wasgij ones should be against the law

I enjoy playing Patience with a pack of cards

I enjoy playing Patience with a pack of cards
Better than watching the Soaps which so often jars

But I might look at 'The Crown' to see what all the fuss is about

But I might look at 'The Crown' to see what all the fuss is about
Why not see how the other half live; give it a shout.

But don't believe everything you see and hear

But don't believe everything you see and hear
Take it all with a pinch of salt, my dear.

Head in the air, but your feet on the ground

Head in the air, but your feet on the ground
New “facts” uncovered, their views are profound

If you want to indulge try I’m a Celebrity, from Wales,

If you want to indulge try I’m a Celebrity, from Wales,
It's light viewing, provides laughter in pails

crazyH do you want to add another line to our Limerick?

The daily food rations are meagre and paltry

The daily food rations are meagre and paltry
Eels and oxtails, no sign of poultry

I don’t think I could survive on rice and beans

I don't think I could survive on rice and beans
I'd rather have Baileys and chocolate creams

I must try to rein in my indulgent habits