Versatile Verse 3

He has his little habits and likes a set routine
He likes so many tit bits he's never going to be lean

He brings his bowl to me at 5 0'clock every night

He brings his bowl to me at 5 o’clock every night
He’s very gentle, his bark is worse than his bite.

Once he’s eaten he lies down, usually across my feet

Once he’s eaten he lies down, usually across my feet
Which, to be honest, I find very sweet.

He's the best company that anyone could have

He's the best company that anyone could have
Except when he chewed my expensive SatNav

He certainly knew he was in disgrace

He certainly knew he was in disgrace
He had such a sad expression on his face

But it's impossible to be cross with him for long

But it's impossible to be cross with him for long
The bond between us is very strong.

I even forgive him his tics and fleas

I even forgive him his tics and fleas
He was always the 'one' amongst his fellow adoptees

I picked him out from many at the rescue centre

I picked him out from many at the rescue centre
He lives with me now, although I'm a renter,

But I'm saving like mad to buy my own house

But I'm saving like mad to buy my own house
Then he’ll be smothered in liquid de-louse

Before having the run of the property

Before having the run of the property
which is a luxury villa down by the sea

I'll sit on the terrace drinking champagne

I'll sit on the terrace drinking champagne
And promise to never again complain.

This is it now, I'm happy and very content

This is it now, I'm happy and very content
looking forward to Easter now it's almost the end of Lent

I can't wait to see dgc and have an Easter egg hunt

I can't wait to see dgc and have an Easter egg hunt
And how about going on the river in a punt?

But be careful that they don't fall in head first

But be careful that they don't fall in head first
With open mouths it’ll quench their thirst

They’ll regret not wearing their water wings

They’ll regret not wearing their water wings
And I’ll wish instead I had suggested the swings.

But children are drawn to water it seems

But children are drawn to water it seems
Lots of fun and excited screams

Water guns are a bit of a thing

Water guns are a bit of a thing
And then I have to push them high on a swing.

This Nannying is such hard work

This Nannying is such hard work
‘Specially the littlest, he’s called Kirk

I chased him round the woods again

I chased him round the woods again
Along the river and down the lane

Which runs alongside the ruins of the castle

Which runs alongside the ruins of the castle
Finally gave up, too much of a hassle

Sat down and opened the picnic basket

Sat down and opened the picnic basket
I'd made little jellies which were nicely set

But first it was the sausage rolls and a few crisps

But first it was the sausage rolls and a few crisps
The gc love them but not good for my hips

I'm trying to avoid becoming Grandma rolypoly

I’m trying to avoid becoming Grandma rolypoly
Let’s play football - I’ll be the goalie

We can play cricket and rounders until the sun goes down

We can play cricket and rounders until the sun goes down
Then we’ll go for a drive into town

I’ll treat them to icecream at Ben & Jerry’s

We can play cricket and rounders until the sun goes down
Then we'll all go back into town

Its a fish supper for us tonight