Versatile Verse 3

I’m not suited to a life of abstinence
I am a sex goddess, with incontinence

That reminds me, I need more Tena

He says I should wear black and live like a nun
That doesn’t sound like a whole lot of fun!

I’m not suited to a life of abstinence

He's frightened I scare off the rest of his flock
With my blonde pigtails and pretty pink frock

He says I should wear black and live like a nun

When I hit top notes, I can shatter glass
The vicar asks me to keep silent when I go to Mass

He's frightened I scare off the rest of his flock

Back to:-
We need some vodka and something botanical
Spinach and lettuce, but nothing mechanical.

When I hit top notes, I can shatter glass

Desdemona would be my character of choice
But it would be a pity not to use my wonderful voice

When I hit the top notes I can shatter glass

Maybe I can distil some gin instead
I’ll need to be careful as it goes straight to my head

We need some vodka and something botanical

So I'll have to start all over again
Will have to collect blackberries for wine, so that's a pain

Maybe I can distill some gin instead

The aroma is heady and I feel quite faint
'Cos it's mixed with bubble bath and has a taint

So I'll have to start all over again

They're calling time at all the pubs
But we can brew our own in our bath tubs

The aroma is heady and I feel quite faint

Lethargy has overwhelmed me
there's no more drinks ar the Argy Bargy

They're calling time at all the pubs

I might as well give up the booze
And get into my bed and snooze

Lethargy has overwhelmed me

There's not much fun going to the Pub
They close at ten, and we can't go to a club.

I might as well give up the booze

Keep your head and your wits about you
Especially when you go for a brew

There's not much fun going to the Pub

Will she remember what she did in the morning
Let this be a word of warning

Keep your head and your wits about you

All this freedom will go to her head
If she drinks too much she may get in the wrong bed

Will she remember what she did in the morning

Methinks they'll need the large ice bucket
My friend might get excited and act like a muppet

All this freedom will go to her head

A table for 6 has been booked
And the champers hasn’t been overlooked!

Methinks they’ll need the larger ice bucket

Bubbles might make us all feel better.
Brr, it's cold so off to get my sweater

A table for 6 has been booked

Champagne tastes on a house wine budget
Hand me a glass and don't begrudge it.

Bubbles might make us all feel better.

Fur coat and no knickers, that's me
I'm extravagant and live beyond my means you see

Champagne tastes on a house wine budget

We're going for a meal and a drink
I fancy champagne that's pink

Fur coat and no knickers, that's me

Of course we’ll keep a social distance
We need lots of Covid resistance

We're going for a meal and a drink

That was a joke, the dusting can wait
I’m off to town to meet a mate

Of course we’ll keep a social distance

And a hood is an absolute must
I'd buy one in town but I have to dust

that was a joke, the dusting can wait