VERSATILE VERSE 3

I collect bric-à-brac, even junk,
It goes back to when I was a Punk

I hope one day it will make me rich

They are on a shelf where I can admire them
Next to a rose with a wire stem

I collect bric-à-brac, even junk,

New topic? I've got two metal hens
The sort that don't need to be kept in pens

They are on a shelf where I can admire them

But power like that was never going to last
And at 91 now her power days are past.

New topic? OK , I’ve got two metal hens

Her wealth was made up of ill gotten gains
She and her husband held the nation's reins

But power like that was never going to last

Twas Imelda Marcos who first set the trend
Her shoes filled the closet from end to end

Her wealth was made up of ill gotten gains

Anyway, who needs twenty-seven pairs of shoes?
Who indeed? I’ve got just 7 (with four that I use).

‘Twas Imelda Marcus who first set the trend.

I quite like my wardrobe being minimalistic
And I'm short of cash so am being realistic.

Anyway, who needs twenty seven pairs of shoes?

When I went last, their rails were bare
But when shops open I’ll donate my share

I quite like my wardrobe being minimalistic

But a good clear out helps fill the charity shops
They need a little boost to their stocks

When I went last, their rails were bare

It's not that I'm mean but I do hate waste
I never throw anything away in haste

But a good clear out helps fill the charity shops

But by then I’m fed up and I hope for change,
I paid a lot for it because it was free range

It’s not that I’m mean but I do hate waste

My housekeeping is going a long way
Since a chicken lasts till the third day

But by then I’m fed up and I hope for change,

I'm desperate for a cut, colour and blow dry
Maybe I’ll just treat myself to a stir fry.

My housekeeping is going a long way

My crowning glory has lost its sheen
It take all my time just to keep it clean

I'm desperate for a cut, colour and blow dry

And she offered to crop me via zoom
I said “how?” and she said “Boom !!!”

My crowning glory has lost its sheen

Any hairdressers open out there
Well my granddaughter really has flair

And she offered to crop me via zoom

Or maybe just a little black dress
What a shame my hair's such a mess

Any hairdressers open out there?

Preceded by a dinner in a restaurant in town
All tricked up in a sparkling jewelled crown

Or maybe just a little black dress

Preceded by a dinner in a restaurant in town.

A companion who loved theatre, really would be great.
There’s such a lot of dramas and musicals I rate.

To keep me in luxury wanting for nowt
someone with refinement ...definitely not a lout!

A companion who loved theatre really would be great

I need a kindhearted man to soothe my brow
And Mr Right would certainly know how

To keep me in luxury wanting for nowt

I’d say “Pardon me Sir, please be heard and not seen!”
“Your face makes you look intensely mean”

I need a kindhearted man to soothe my brow

I could listen for hours with undisguised lust
Till he undoes his coat and exposes his bust!

I’d say “Pardon me Sir, please be heard and not seen!”