Limericks 17

You could say I'm a handsome catch
I think we’d be a perfect match
He has a slight squint
His hair's had a tint
And over one eye is a patch

I think I met him in the past!

I think I met him in the past!
At a talent contest, he came last,

I think I met him in the past!
At a talent contest, he came last,
It doesn't bode well

I think I met him in the past!
At a talent contest, he came last,
It doesn't bode well
But still, we might jell

I think I met him in the past!
At a talent contest, he came last,
It doesn't bode well
But still, we might jell
If not,then aside he'll be cast.

At my age I'm not too fussy

At my age I'm not too fussy
But please don’t think I’m a hussy

At my age I'm not too fussy
But please don’t think I’m a hussy
No sex on first date!

At my age I'm not too fussy
But please don’t think I’m a hussy
No sex on first date!
All that stuff can wait!

At my age I'm not too fussy
But please don’t think I’m a hussy
No sex on first date!
All that stuff can wait!
Just cwtch on a sofa, cosy.

My boyfriend was called Everard

My boyfriend was called Everard
He likened himself to the Bard

My boyfriend was called Everard
He likened himself to the bard
He attempted sonnets

My boyfriend was called Everard
He likened himself to the bard
He attempted sonnets
About maid in bonnets

My boyfriend was called Everard
He likened himself to the bard
He attempted sonnets
About maid in bonnets
Then sadly got feathered and tarred.

His sonnets were really that bad

His sonnets were really that bad
And when he finished I was glad

His sonnets were really that bad
And when he finished I was glad
No more recitals

His sonnets were really that bad
And when he finished I was glad
No more recitals
They made me suicidal

His sonnets were really that bad
And when he finished I was glad
No more recitals
They made me suicidal
And so I ran home to my Dad.

I've always been a Daddy's girl

I've always been a Daddy's girl
He said I was his precious pearl

I've always been a Daddy's girl
He said I was his precious pearl
Found me on the beach

Another first line to ponder
What shall I write I do ponder
I'm not erudite
And not a playwright
Pray I make no writing blunder!

That's
What shall I write I do wonder

Sorry happycatholicwife1 you seem to be using the wrong lines.

I've always been a Daddy's girl
He said I was his precious pearl
Found me on the beach
Along with a peach

I've always been a Daddy's girl
He said I was his precious pearl
Found me on the beach
Along with a peach
Together we’d twizzle and twirl.

Sid dug up a fossil one day

Sid dug up a fossil one day
“An ammonite”, I heard him say

Sid dug up a fossil one day
“An ammonite”, I heard him say
He sold it online