Limericks (July 23)

The ironing board was sold abroad
So adds to someone’s jumble hoard
They must love old things
‘Specially silver rings
Let’s hope that they are not all frauds

A woman who once heard a mouse

The ironing board was sold abroad
So adds to someone's jumble hoard
They must love old things
‘Specially silver rings
Which I believe was bought by a lord

The ironing board went to Spain

Mel1967

The ironing board was sold abroad
So adds to someone’s jumble hoard
They must love old things
‘Specially silver rings
Let’s hope that they are not all frauds

A woman who once heard a mouse

What was wrong with my ending and beginning???

Mel1967
Nothing my mistake don’t know what happened not concentrating

Nothing wrong with it Mel1967 - probably just an oversight …

A woman who once heard a mouse
Hid in the attic of her house

A woman who once heard a mouse
Hid in the attic of her house
She found a gold ring

A woman who once heard a mouse
Hid in the attic of her house
She found a gold ring
Then she started to sing

A woman who once heard a mouse
Hid in the attic of her house
She found a gold ring
Then she started to sing
About how she married a louse.

In fact he was rather a rat

In fact he was rather a rat
Was finally taught tit-for-tat

In fact he was rather a rat
Was finally taught tit-for-tat
He was quite awful

In fact he was rather a rat
Was finally taught tit-for-tat
He was quite awful
He jumped in the pool

In fact he was rather a rat
Was finally taught tit-for-tat
He was quite awful
He jumped in the pool
And sank like a stone so that’s that.

If you could go back to your past

If you could go back to your past
Remember the last time you laughed

If you could go back to your past
Remember the last time you laughed
You would be young again

If you could go back to your past
Remember the last time you laughed
You would be young again
No heartache or pain

If you could go back to your past
Remember the last time you laughed
You would be young again
No heartache or pain
Fond memories of behaving daft

My youth seems quite innocent now

My youth seems quite innocent now,
Compared to youth today, somehow,

My youth seems quite innocent now,
Compared to youth today, somehow,
White boots and mini

My youth seems quite innocent now
Compared to youth today, somehow
White boots and a mini
Also quite skinny

My youth seems quite innocent now
Compared to youth today, somehow
White boots and mini
Also quite skinny
Yet lost my boyfriend to a ‘cow’

Strutted her ‘falsies’, in high heels

Strutted her 'falsies' in high heels
Drove off with my man in his 'wheels'

Strutted her falsies in high heels
Drove off with my man in his wheels
She was quite a tart

Strutted her falsies in high heels
Drove off with my man in his wheels
She was quite a tart
Went way off the chart

Strutted her falsies in high heels
Drove off with my man in his wheels
She was quite a tart
Went way off the chart
Broke a nail, can still hear her squeals

Make up applied with a trowel

Make up applied with a trowel
To dress, she would drape in a towel