New Limerick Thread II 2016 (following New Limerick Thread)

Their story became a best seller
A book one would hide in the cellar
I read it at night
Until it was light

Their story became a best seller
A book one would hide in the cellar
I read it at night

Their story became a best seller
A book one would hide in the cellar

My friend Lady Anne was his boss
A woman who gave not a toss
She loved him so well
She quite liked the smell
At least he didn't smell like his hoss.

(Poetic license with pronunciation)

Their story became a best seller

My friend Lady Anne was his boss
A woman who gave not a toss
She loved him so well
She quite liked the smell

(continuing the low tone 😳)

My friend Lady Anne was his boss
A woman who gave not a toss
She loved him so well

My friend Lady Anne was his boss
A woman who gave not a toss

A gamekeeper one fancied me
He thought I was his cup of tea
But he wouldn't bathe, alas
No scent of fresh mown grass
Just quite a strong smell of stale wee

(sorry for being disgusting and lowering the tone)

My friend Lady Anne was his boss

A gamekeeper once fancied me
He thought I was his cup of tea
But he wouldn't bathe, alas
No scent of fresh mown grass

A gamekeeper once fancied me
He thought I was his cup of tea
But he wouldn't bathe, alas

A gamekeeper once fancied me
He thought I was his cup of tea

He’s willing to sleep in the shed
His man cave complete with a bed
He does as he’s told
Now, shall I be bold
And allow myself to be led…

A gamekeeper once fancied me

He's willing to sleep in the shed
His man cave complete with a bed
He does as he's told
Now, shall I be bold

He's willing to sleep in the shed
His man cave complete with a bed
He does as he's told

He's willing to sleep in the shed
His man cave complete with a bed

At household repairs I’m inept
So a handy man I have kept
Looks after his tools,
Doesn't tolerate fools
Well... you'd all want one I expect.

He's willing to sleep in the shed

At household repairs I’m inept
So a handy man I have kept
Looks after his tools,
Doesn't tolerate fools

At household repairs I’m inept
So a handy man I have kept
Looks after his tools,

At household repairs I’m inept
So a handy man I have kept

But got out my pack full of Dreamies
No one can call me a meanie
The cat's favourite treat
Is a piece of red meat
But the chicken kind makes him steamy.

At household repairs I'm inept

But got out my pack full of Dreamiest
No one can call me a meanie
The cat's favourite treat
Is a piece of red meat!

But got out my packs full of Dreamies
No one can call me a meanie
The cat's favourite treat

But got out my packs full of Dreamies
No one can call me a meanie

I once had a cat who just left
And I was just feeling bereft
He came back one day
On the first of May
I thought "surely, it was a theft"

But got out my packs full of Dreamies

I once had a cat who just left
And I was just feeling bereft
He came back one day
On the first of May