Grandma very poorly

gillybob I am still thinking of you both, take care of yourself.

Gilly Your tales about your Grandma have been inspiring for those of us who dread extreme old age proving that it can be a pleasurable stage of life. I wish your Granma either a speedy return to her old self or a speedy release if that time has come. Sending (((hugs))) for both of you.

Your self!

Gilly don't forget to look after you're.f.

(((hugs))) Gilly

Wishing you strength patience and every possible comfort at this hard time. Ypu have clearly.inherited her " strong" genes.

You are in my thoughts Gilly

gilly

Sending best wishes gilly and the strength to carry on, you are a very caring person and your grandma will appreciate you being there for her.

A very difficult time for you gillybob, thank goodness she has carers going in 3 times a day which will give you some peace of mind and an opportunity to get on with all your own things which must be on your mind as well.

I think with her now being in a confused state of mind she may be unaware of how time is passing so what will seem like days or weeks to you may not seem like that to her.

It would be lovely to think we could all just slip away in our sleep when the time comes, but unfortunately it doesn't seem to work that way does it. But comfort yourself by knowing that up until now she has been able to get pleasure from life and share many precious times with you.

Dear Gillybob I am so sorry to hear of this heartbreaking situation for you and your Grandma. Even in her confused state she will sense you are there with her, talking to her and holding her hand. It's all you can do for her Gilly but you can't do this 24hrs a day. Please, please don't feel guilty that you can't, you are only human but giving her comfort when you can will stay with her. My thoughts are with you both. x

Gilly - I been here with both my parents in turn. It is not a good place to be and my heart goes out to you. There comes a point where you just want them to quietly slip away - even though you can hardly believe you are thinking such s thing.

Thank you all so very much for such lovely comments and practical advice too. The Situation hasn't changed very much except for my grandma has been taken off all pain killers but doctor insists she continues with her water tablets, warfarin and antibiotics (as a precaution) against a what I ask? but never mind. She is drifting constantly between being totally "with it" and holding a short conversation to being "away with the fairies" imagining people being there who are not and crying and mumbling. It is heartbreaking to see her like this. I know she doesn't want to be here anymore and has virtually no quality of life or dignity left compared with only a few weeks ago. Social services are sending two carers three times a day now which is such a relief but she should probably be in hospital. I am terrified that she could end up in a local authority home as haven't heard any good reports of any in in this area sadly. Fortunately I only live 15-20 minutes drive away from her so am going backwards and forwards although I must go to work today for a few hours at least. The doctor said that we could go on like this for weeks or even months! After the last few days I honestly didn't think I would be telling all you lovely people that my grandma was still with us, but she is for now. They obviously made them of stronger stuff in 1916.

Thanks you all so much again for such lovely caring messages. to you all.

Gilly I only just saw this thread and cannot offer any help as I have no experience but just want to say that you are doing a brilliant job and send you hugs and

Thinking about you and your grandma, Gillybob. xx

dear gillybob,,,,,my heart goes out to you too,,,,,,you are brilliant try to be strong as i would suspect this might be the golden days of her life....so just make her as comfortable as you can,,,watch for pressure sores on her bottom and her elbows and her shoulder blades,,,to help her circulation we used baby oil and surgical spirit as a massage lotion,,,,but please check this out things may have changed ( that was used in hospitals,)we did this everyday,,,,,after we washed patients. i wouldnt give her any drugs unless its for pain,,,,,,small sips of water regularly,,,,yoghurts...ice cream..and soups she will like,,,,maybe lucazade.....remind yourself you are amazing and doing a great job, she will know you are there even if she doesnt show it, talk to her as a normal person...like you used to, go to social services,,,they will give advice as to where to get things like a bed pan,,or toilet stool/chair....you can get incontinent sheets from your surgery i think,,or get a prescription for them,,,,,,,you can get incontinent disposable panties too if she is in need of them,......if you can afford it you can get a night nurse maybe twice a week to give you a break,,,,you need it,,,,or ask another member of the family to take a turn,dont struggle on your own,it must be hard,,,i nursed my mum in her own home for a while,,,but she went into hospital she didnt want to go ,,,but i was exsausted,,,no family wanted to help,,,,,,,,,,she died in hospital a few weeks later,,,,,,its all so very sad,,,but life is cruel......just do the best you can,,,,and take care of yourself...keep in touch with us all and let us all know how things are,,,,,,hugs angie baby,xxxxx hug for grandma too,,,,,xxxx

take care of yourself too Gilly. Sending strengthening vibes.

gilly (((hugs)))

How are things? Has she recovered from the medication? Is she more herself now? Thinking of you.

Same here, newist. Do hope for some good news.

Dear Gilly I have been watching to see how both you and your Grandma are doing. I keep thinking of you both, hoping to see some good news about your Grandma. I am not very good at putting how I feel into words, much better face to face. What I am trying to say is I hope she has improved and that you are getting some help in this difficult situation.

Just caught up with this thread. Sending my very best wishes to you and your Grandma gilly. It is very difficult to watch loved ones suffer, you have done the right thing stopping the Tramadol

gillybob your lovely grandma will be comforted from having you close by to care for her. It's tough watching the person you love fade like this. I hope today's better for you both

to you and your Grandma, Gillybob. I do hope she has got over the tramadol experience by now. May today be a better one for both of you.

Dear Gillybob - we know how much your Grandma means to you, and how you have cared for her. Your distress is so clear, and my heart goes out to you. xxx