Help needed for Autistic Nephew.

Oh glass what a terrible situation for your sister, I can't help I'm sorry, I wish I could. This sort of thing makes my blood boil

glass so sorry to read that. I find it extremely scary how with mental health problems, basically people are on their own. Abandoned by the system.

Is there any chance that they could get private help for him? We have a younger friend who was finally diagnosed with ADHD after years of losing jobs and going through a very difficult time. In desperation, he sought help from and was initially scripted by a private psychiatrist, but now that he is stable, his care has been transferred to his NHS GP.

Can she refuse to have him home? I mean as a negotiating tactic so that they have nowhere to discharge him to? She could say she is going away and has changed the locks. Also who is her MP- do you think there is any support there? Also, the GP - any help,there?

Is it worth contacting a journalist about this, Glass? Your nephew might not like that and your sister could find that it made things even worse, but a bit of publicity could get her some help.

However can she get by without using those common words? And he is not living hygienically. That would not be tolerated in anyone else. If he were not autistic and behaving like this he would have got some attention and treatment, even to the point of sectioning him! She sounds as though she is in danger if he lost control - I really think she needs to create marry hell somewhere before she is hurt.

Completely separately from his need for treatment, she needs protection. It could even come to her having to sever all connection with him for her own safety, dreadful though that would be.

I don't understand why there seems to be so little help for people in situations like this. There's nothing I can say to help...I wish there was. I feel so sorry for your sister, glass .

glassortwo my friend [who is my age] has a son now about 30 who was similar, but she was told he was a danger to her and that she should not live with him.He became paranoid as well [like your nephew.]They managed to secure a small flat for him, and benefits. It's a sad life for him and also for her, we love our children and it's heartbreaking.Because there is autism in our family too, I understand how dreadful it can become for your sister, and for your nephew as well.As you say, there is funding for 'normal' depression, anxiety etc but the view is often 'oh well they are autistic, what can you expect!'Your sister must bang on lots of doors, because my friend did just that until action was taken. What they can't do is make sure he takes the medication.

I imagine she has already been in touch with all the autism societies?

Go to the MP. I too have an autistic nephew whose mum (my sister) has been similarly embattled. The services for autistic children and young adults are abysmal - everyone passes the buck. I have no solution for you but my heart goes out to your sister and this poor lad.

My DS spoke to the psychologist who has carried out a risk assessment with examples and dates of her Sons aggressive incidents and a catalogue of
behaviour and her medical problems to be passed onto the panel.
DS has told psychologist that she cant have her Son home as they were both vulnerable and would both be at risk.
DS is contacting a Solicitor and the Autism Society this morning to find out what the position is for her Son.
Also contacting the press is a consideration.
Thank you for your advice.

I have great sympathy for you and this situation with your nephew, glasssortwo, as I have an autistic grandson. He is 15 snd is now, at long last, getting some support at school. But I am very concerned about what will happen to him once he leaves school.
I wish I could suggest some help, but I know very little about what is available for autistic adults. It is disgraceful that so little help seems available.

henetha his problem seemed to come threefold once he left school. All support disappeared but his OCD /ADHD was not visible.

I'm glad your sister has a plan of action glass she must stay grimly determined, and if she has health probs, this may work in her favour.As I said on a different autism thread, getting a diagnosis for autism,ADHD and OCD is important if you need help. People who do not understand say blithely 'oh, no labels, it's not nice for children', and this is only acceptable if you are so mildy affected that it goes almost un-noticed.Autism ADHD and OCD go almost hand in hand.My DGS has them all.The washing thing [OCD] is the most common OCD behavior.It's a national disgrace that so little funding is given to mental health. Experts and local councils all twist things and try and squirm out of helping at every level, so they do not have to pay.Even to downright lying.The parents have to be strong in all kinds of ways, and it helps if they are intelligent and articulate as well, to get the best for their child.God help those parents who are none of those things.

That is quite scary, glassortwo. I shall encourage my GS to stay in education for as long as possible! Luckily he is quite bright, but his social problems are immense. I wish your sister and her son all the best for some sort of help.

glass

Just an update the funding has been extended for 1 week so all reports and information can be available to the panel to enable them to make a decision.
Ds has had some very useful information from The Autisic Society which has been very helpful.
So fingers crossed that they extend funding At the end of the extension
.

Unfortunately this situation is all too common ,particularly in relation to adult Autistic people. I am so glad the National Autistic Society has been helpful, but their hands are tied by the lack of understanding and funding available. . I have friends with 2 Autistic Adult sons,aged 28and 32. They both still live at home and their parents are having to fund more and more regarding transport to day centres, outreach and respite care (sparse) etc. I worked with younger autistic Children for several years and now volunteer at a drop in group for parents. Sadly the funding is becoming harder and harder to have the answer 'Yes' and more and more parents are having to go to Tribunal. This is a shocking reflection on the way this country treats those with any kind of mental health problem .I do hope the funding will continue for the sake of everyone concerned in your family and others.

glass So pleased to read your update about the extension. Although not long, better than nothing and hope it provides enough respite and time to develop and access further support.

Just wanted to give you an update the funding has been extended for a few months which is a huge relief to my Sister.
My Nephew has had a few aggressive incidents while in Bethlem and has had to be restrained so possibly this has helped in re-enforcing the panels decision.

I've only just read this thread. I'm very pleased that funding for your nephew's treatment has been extended, glass. I hope he gets what he needs and your sister some respite from associated stresses

That is good news, glass.