Dementia

Just back from MiL. Have arranged urine sample as was suggested. Dementia lady(not sure of her proper title) is looking in arranging social worker to get in touch with me to discuss some care in mornings MiL states she doesn't want anybody! but will cross that bridge later. Her mood was complete opposite to what its been ( all very friendly even to her DS). I was able to explain how she had been over last 2 weeks before she went to speak to MiL which was helpful. Hopeful might setttle down with medication being prompted. Not sure how soon this can be put into place. if this doesn't help then will ask for medication review. Time for a cuppa

Just back from MiL. Have arranged urine sample as was suggested. Dementia lady(not sure of her proper title) is looking in arranging social worker to get in touch with me to discuss some care in mornings MiL states she doesn't want anybody! but will cross that bridge later. Her mood was complete opposite to what its been ( all very friendly even to her DS). I was able to explain how she had been over last 2 weeks before she went to speak to MiL which was helpful. Hopeful might setttle down with medication being prompted. Not sure how soon this can be put into place. if this doesn't help then will ask for medication review. Time for a cuppa

I think that Dad had been on it for a couple of years, and as he was becoming increasingly unsteady his GP decided that the time had come to discontinue it. The effects of donepezil and other cognitive enhancers only lasts for about two years any way. Falls were a problem. It was not long after this that we decided that residential care was required. He is now well settled in a lovely care home. He came off warfarin also, due to the falls.

Without knowing your Dad's situation hilda it would seem from what I am told Donepezil is supposed to keep the dementia at bay for a bit longer. My DH had to come of it because of side effects. I can only think maybe your Dad was distressed by his failing memory and it was felt he would be happier not knowing. It is a balancing act.My DH knows what he has and while he gets very frustrated we can cope although I now have to do everything, in the home,finance,"admin" and look after us both.We have been to the INR clinic today as we have 4 times in the last few weeks,and every few weeks for the past 2 years, he doesn't know where we go,what happens when we get there and actually why he goes. It is a terrible illness.

Good tip about possible UTI. Does your MiL take any cognitive enhancers eg. donepezil? It might be worth asking to have them discontinued, as they give the demented just that little bit of insight that, as the disease progresses, they can do without. Doing this helped a lot in my Dad's case.

My husband, who does not have dementia, gets frequent Utis because of his physical situation. I always know when one is starting because he gets confused and very tetchy.

kittyl That's a really good suggestion about a uti test. My DF changed drastically because of a uti and also when I noticed that he had a sore throat.

My aunt asks after my parents, deceased for 30 and 28 years, " oh just the same " is the reply. It is not a lie as such and she seems happy with that.

Another thought Cherry tree, it might be worth getting a uti test done. Mum's confusion is much worse when she had a uti.

Mum had lots of those tests but hasn't for a while. The never argue but never lie advice doesn't work for very long as, in our experience, one just gets tied up in knots.

The dementia test is just the quiz where they ask their name age etc. Then they give them a score out of 20 I think. I also Impliment the agreeing with her tactic. But unfortunatly the last out burst was with the friend I mentioed accusing her of having affair with her DS My DH ! Hard one to agree with

It is nice to hear from you posie as I remember you posting when you were having lots of problems.I think your H went into care,if he didn't I apologise but if I am right has he settled ok and happy?. It is what we all don't want to think too much about at the stage I am at.

Thanks all of you will get meds reviewed. Just the prob now of getting help with finding someone to prompt her to take them. We live 20 miles away. Tried calling her but she either says she's taken them even if she hasn't. Done so or doesn't answer phone which means quick dash over to check on her.

Cherry my DH has Alzheimer's and I am intrigued by the yearly dementia test she has. We do have visits from a CPN and any medication and behavioural changes are discussed but it is very informal and no testing has ever been done since the original consultation with a Psychiatrist. You do need to tell her all the changes that have taken place.My DH is not aggressive but he is moody and cantankerous at times and the drug kitty mentioned-memantine- is prescribed for aggression and similar. DH has been on it now for about 6 weeks and we have a review in September. If we are all happy that he is ok on the meds and can continue then the CPN will hand us over to the care of our GP and Heaven help us then!! It is nearly 2 years since diagnosis and we have had not one bit of interest from them in that time.
DH certainly could not be on his own for even a day so it may be time you,as a family were looking at alternatives for her.
Good luck and keep us informed.

I agree with Liz46, never argue or try to try to get them to see the logic in something because it's just impossible for them.

I would ask if it's possible for them to send someone in to make sure she takes her meds in the morning. This is sometimes possible depending where you live.

Maybe you ned to discuss hr medication at this visit. It is well known that very elderly people react in a somewhat idiosyncratic way to drugs, so maybe the anti-depressant is causing problems. A medication review might not come amiss.

When my mum became aggressive she agreed to go into a dementia unit for assessment (we were prepared to have her sectioned if necessary!). There they looked at, and changed some of her medication. She was prescribed memantine (??) which is prescribed in increasing doses over a four week period. It certainly helped in mum's case.

I do know of someone on gn whose relative has just started on this drug - she might be along in a while to share her experience. Your Mil has done well ( presumably with lots of help) to stay in her own home - my mum has been in a home for about five years now!

Good luck!

I think one of the things that I learned whilst looking after my mother was never to argue with someone with dementia. Just smile and agree with everything she says even if it is nonsense. White lies were told to keep my mother happy.