Dangerous self-harm fad amongst teenagers

I intended no slight on those who have felt the need to do this - I am sure that there are very different people from many different backgrounds. Certainly my experience as a SW was that they did tend to be girls and that these girls often felt themselves unloved - that does not mean that they were unloved, as I can testify from the desperation of their parents who loved them dearly.

What I was trying to flag up is that it has become a sort of badge of honour amongst some young communities to have the the scars; and that it is being fuelled by social media and texting.

My intention was to raise awareness, particularly among those who (like myself) would have thought that this was the very last thing they might have expected. Knowledge is power.

True trisher,

Nor has it always been girls. I know quite a few people who have self harmed. One is a woman in her late fifties (Yes it did happen that long ago)and some were boys, now men in their thirties. Just because no-one talked about it doesn't mean it wasn't happening. Most of the people I know were loved and cared for and not socially isolated, but they are very creative people.

Not true that all self harmers are isolated or unloved or feel isolated or unloved, my elder daughter too has bi polar , she is very ill in hospital , has been for two weeks, she is deeply loved

The thing that concerns me is that self-harming has indeed been going on a long time, but it tended to be isolated with girls (in particular) who were anxious, unhappy and felt unloved; but now it is being pushed as a sort of craze amongst all the pupils, regardless of background of emotional stability. "Slitting" is the latest fad.

I am sure that there are many people on here saying to themselves that their GC would never get involved in this - but it is becoming more widespread and I do not think that any of us can afford to be complacent about it. I would not have believed it could possibly be impinging on my DGC until I saw it for myself. We need to be alert and aware. That was the purpose of my post.

The only thing phones bring to this problem is that they make it easier to tell others. Teens have been self-harming for a long time- long before phones. Arguably it is more in the open now than it ever was. Banning phones won't stop it. Self harmers need love, help and understanding. Most will get through it and stop, some will have no long term problems others won't be so lucky. It is apparently about releasing psychological pain through physical pain. Going "Oh isn't it awful" is no help whatsoever.

I agree with jingl. I think the parents need to group together to ban the phones for a few days.

My S's partner who has Bipolar disprfder has cut herself from a young age. Her arms are a sorry sight. When particularly bad she cuts her feet to the extent that she can't walk. She certainly didn't pick this up from the media but it is hard to stop once it starts. What a world they are growing up in.

I agree about the phones, and also some of the devices that seem to claim their attention and the whole of their minds for such long periods of time. However it is not in my control - DD and her OH are the parents and it is their decision. I am sure they have put much thought into it - where they live every child has a phone like this. Is it right to make your child stand out by being the only one without one when you are able to afford it? - I do not know the answer to that; only the parents can make that judgement - I am sure that when they decided to let him have the phone they would have had no idea of this nonsense that has ensued. I trust their parenting skills - but no-one can predict the unexpected.

Why do kids need phones that take and receive photos? I'm glad my fourteen year old GS just has a bog standard mobile, able to send and receive texts and calls, and no more. Parents need to put some thought into this parenting business.

MY GC is 12 - he gets texts from gangs of girls who and send photos of the results, and encourage copycat actions. The school is on to it, but goodness knows how they might stop it.

I understand there are websites promoting this behaviour. This is not anything particularly new. Is this the new "sexting" type of behaviour.

It is just horrendous.

I was going to post on this thread but my experience with a close family friend and her daughter would be too upsetting to explain to everyone. Suffice to say, yes it is happening here and gaining in popularity (goodness knows why) and it is horrific. Girls are more prone to it but boys also do it. It is important that we are aware of it and can offer emotional support to our children if they have to deal with it with their own children.

Not only teenagers and those in their twenties, can happen at any age

There's an ongoing storyline in Emmerdale which features this subject, although the self-harmer is a troubled young man. It definitely goes on in this country, and it isn't a new phenomenon. I knew a girl in the 60s who used to cut her arms, although she did have psychological problems.

Yes, I can confirm that it is certainly going on here - and not only teenagers and troubled children either. One of my sons has had two girlfriends who had both self-harmed - and well into their twenties. One is a lawyer and one a doctor. Girls seem to be under so much pressure and seemingly this helps in some unimaginable way!

I am grandma - no power, as we know.

Believe me, it is going on in this country and the incitement to this is via texts etc. - and the children involved are pre-teens. I am horrified . If I had been asked yesterday I would have responded as jing has - now I know better.

I suppose the advice would be to not follow what others do, if it was done for that reason.
Or to try and find out what is the problem, if there is a problem. But that might not be appropriate if a grandparent.

Self harm does seem to be on the increase, including cutting and starving. My experience of working with teenage girls in care homes was that if one started cutting, there would be an outbreak with other young women (usually young women) joining in.
The prevalence of internet sites about cutting/anorexia may have a similar effect, that is of normalising self harm as a means of helping to contain or control feelings that are otherwise overwhelming.

I watched a bit of Big Brother this afternoon (visiting someone, I'll say no more). I was genuinely shocked again by the extent of dramatic, competitive acting out. The swearing, the aggressive, volatile behaviour of all involved. I am familiar with the argument that eg. violent video games don't encourage young people to act them out But, honestly - if "entrainment' is primarily this kind of no wonder young people struggle to deal with the difficulties that go with growing up.

Exactly. American. Neither of my GSs would do it. They can't stand the sight of blood!

That's an American link Luckygirl - is it prevalent here too?