Bowel movements (you have been warned!)

In an obstetric case, forceps would be indicated, but that doesn't seem appropriate. I would prescribe manual pressure applied an inch to one or both sides of the exit route, angled inwards at 45 degrees or so, so as to form a dent in the offending object just above its sticking point and narrow it enough to get through. A touch of lubricant might help too. Longer term, a visit to the GP to see whether the cause is a rectocele.

Suggestion

jings

Fibrogel?

www.boots.com/en/Fybogel-Hi-Fibre-Orange-30-Sachets_25139/
Currently out of stock, apparently, so you may not be the only one with a problem phoenix

Ana did you watch "Red Dwarf" ? In one episode the crew find themselves on a planet where everything happens in reverse. The fastidious Cat nips into the bushes on a call of nature and comes back very traumatised, refusing to talk about his experience.

ps you can collect 28 Boots points as well - always look on the bright side

Elegran, no I didn't, but I can imagine...

Oh what a laugh I'm still having! Regalo I am prescribed Xyloproct Ointment thankfully. If that hadn't been invented I would need to be scraped off the ceiling!

Jings?? I used to put a piece of soap where the sun don't shine! Worked for me. Don't try shampoo because that stings like hell!

My friend had the same problem (I have too at times.) She was referred to a "gut specialist" and he prescribed some powder which she takes daily to provide "bulk." I can't remember the name of the condition, but I looked it up and it said it was very common in older women. Could be a late result of pushing effort in childbirth.
Also the involuntary muscles in the colon etc become weaker with age.
I agree with the person on ?page 2 who mentioned brown bread. I make wholemeal bread, Dove's Farm, and a slice or 2 of that keeps me going.
Also lots of water.

wot I remember doing that when having a bit of a problem after having DS1, but I don't think that would be feasible under current circumstances

Inspired by this thread I have just eaten a fruit fool made in the Nutri-Ninja consisting of prunes, apricots, apple, banana, pear, coconut, bran and benecol. I will be thinking of you phoenix when enthroned tomorrow morning!

Ha, ha ha!!! I've always enjoyed anal humour, like my dear brother! Much to his wife,s disgust! How does an accountant cope with his constipation? He works it out with pencil. Have you heard about the Spanish dancer who was constipated... he couldn't passe doble.

Yikes Luckygirl - you should have a sticker on you -Highly Explosive!!

who needs gunpowder!

Hope you don't crack the pan!?

I understand perfectly, Phoenix. As a vegetarian I have loads of the right kind of food still but have trouble with the "final event". Quite scary sometimes! I find it is often related to having the right conditions - can't go if anyone else in the house, etc. (guests i mean). Holidays can be a real problem. Not sure I have an answer though - at least it isn't just me!
Did you hear about the constipated accountant? He worked it out with a pencil.

omg am I equidistant between phoenix and luckygirl?

Evacuate, evacuate

Not meaning both of you btw

Literally!

although I hope you do (quietly)

Rockgran, that's the joke I meant but I told it wrongly! (Accountant)

Try spelt bread - makes lovely toast. It's very very low in gluten so you get the fibre without the bloating.

I didn't know about the effects of eating peanut butter

I had spelt pillow once.

wot ???

I had a pillow filled with spelt seeds! I washed it and had to throw it out because it wouldn't dry properly.