Holiday panic again !

Lived on my own over 25 years!
Last holiday was over 6 years ago with 'Solos'
Decided on a last holiday after retirement. Am booked for Sicily in September.
Seen GP last night and starting on new medication and several suggestions re CBT Moodjuice ??
Been there done that !!!
In retrospect would have done a last minute holiday!!

Grannylyne, I understand completely. When ive booked a holiday I start worrying and pack my case weeks beforehand. I find that when I get on the train or even plane, the worry goes and I feel free and excited ! And that's going on my own.

GrannyLynn, How sad that what should be pleasurable anticipation is a source of such anxiety. What is the purpose of your holiday? Are you going abroad to visit someone? Are you going on your own? Are you going somewhere you have always wanted to visit? Sorry to sound nosy but it does help to have an objective at the end of a flight. Before my joints began to fall apart, I went on Ramblers' Holidays which gave me an objective to research before I departed and good company when I arrived.
Whatever your purpose or expectations, I hope you enjoy your holiday and - with your misgivings dispelled - will be eager to book another one soon!

GrannyLynn - try to breakdown the problems you see into those you can do something about, and those which can't be changed. Last year I cancelled my visit to family in the UK, for various reasons - mainly practical. The main things are getting to &from the airport (M25) only one toilet up steep stairs in their house, I sleep badly etc.
I really want to see them though so might make the effort again this year. ( A commode - never, I hope.) Don't want to admit that I'm past it.
They do come to us.

We're lucky enough to have travelled a lot, and can now take advantage of cheap fares and off peak trips, which we love. I've always enjoyed the journey and even the airport, but that aspect's certainly more stressful now.

We went to Center Parcs last week with the family, and I'd forgotten how relaxing a holiday can be. Even with all the grandchildren in tow, it was just so laidback and stress-free. Just an hour's drive to get there and then everything within pleasant walking distance. I realise it doesn't help you enjoy preparing for the holiday you have booked, but I'd certainly recommend trying something like this next time if you want to relax.

Oops sorry.Meant to say it's NOT fear of flying with me.Once on the plane I'm fine.It's the whole build up before hand.And the actual airports nowadays. Experiencing several very long delays over the years, after getting up in the middle of the night for an early flight and being stuck in the airport all day,hasn't helped my mindset either.But OP that's probably not helpful mentioning that!I hope that your trip goes well and you feel it's worth it.Like you I probably need to explore some relaxing techniques and strategies for the future. All the best.

OP whilst perhaps not quite as anxious I can identify with you,especially your comment about becoming more introverted.I'm still very much working, but self employed and not part of a 'team',spending a fair part of each day on my own.Life events over the last few years, some sudden and unexpected I think have led to me me craving as quiet, peaceful and stress free time as possible.I know that's unrealistic.
I used to love the whole going on holiday,arriving at the airport thing but now find it all such hard work.Last year we did go abroad ,and had a lovely time once there ,but I literally didn't sleep properly for several days before and felt like cancelling too.
I'm going away tomorrow, in this country without DH to stay with a much loved friend,and it involves several train changes and I tossed and turned all last night ,and at the moment-especially seeing the weather forecast!- feel I can't be bothered with the pfaff of the journey.But I've kept promising my friend I will visit her new home and will not give in, or I will end up going nowhere.I love my home and garden,and animals. STARBIRD a dog and a cat relax you at home,but many people feel anxiety leaving them behind.In fact our main holiday this year is a cottage in this country,and we are taking our dogs with us.DH is fine with that ,although he's said next year he wants a hot sunny relaxing holiday and for his sake I will go.It's not fear of flying,which I appreciate can be crippling.Just the whole general anxiety about leaving home,packing and tickets etc.And that home is where I feel truly relaxed.What a pain!

Have seen GP who has changed medication and was very relieved to discuss my feelings. Will take time ans still have reservations re holiday. Since I stopped part time job have become a bit introverted?

Mind you....nothing, absolutely nothing would get me on an aeroplane! Hopeless.

Always suffered from anxiety and it used to stop me from travelling, then thought, life too short! Use deep breathing on the plane, and positive thinking when away. Have since been non safari in Africa, travelled around India, and crossed the Atlas Mountains by mule, and camped in the Wadi Rhum Desert! Just go for it- you won't regret it!!

Airport assistance people are lovely. You could see about that? They take you through everything to the door of the plane and meet you on arrival at your destination and see you all the way to your transport to your hotel/accommodation.

Grannylynn one journey at a time, its just a trip to the airport, its just one flight, then its just one more flight ...... Small steps.Take your time, big breaths and NO thinking unless its about a nice chilled wine when you arrive. P.S dont forget to send GN a postcard. &

Hi grannylynn65 I too suffer from anxiety and can empathise with how you feel, it is so hard sometimes and each day is different. I do think Craicon offers some good advice, I have used hypnotherapy and it has certainly helped me to a degree following a very serious assault. I do hope you get some help and are able to go on holiday and enjoy yourself. Best wishes

Some really good points Grans x?

Hi grannylyn I can't add much to the advice already posted

I do sympathise with holiday anxiety as I am a fellow sufferer.
For the last couple of years I have opted for for several short uk breaks even so the thought packing makes me anxious.

You have made provision for a smooth travel experience to Gatwick and back home
So start with ticking that off your list

Nighttime is when you will probably worry more so maybe some music or a audio book from the library on personal CD player will stop the worry worms in your ears .
Could also be useful at airport and on plane.

I wish you a lovely holiday
Just visualise yourself already there with a cocktail in your hand

grannylyn where are you going to once you get to Gatwick? Or are you holidaying in Gatwick?!

For me ... (and this is just me) what would be the point of going on holiday medicated up to the eyeballs? Or of course in a state of permanent anxiety...

I know there are people on here who will disagree with me, but can't you do an exercise where you talk yourself out of the anxiety, saying out loud "It is only anxiety, it will pass". I promise you over time the anxiety will diminish in intensity and/or you will reach the "Sod it, (insert whatever is causing the anxiety) bring it on" stage, because facing the fear is better than living with anxiety any day.

I'm obviously not talking about someone who has a proper phobia.

Also, I understand that for some people holidays cause anxiety but I disagree that it is always a stressful situation.

Try to find a good hypnotist who will help you to deal with your anxieties.
My friend suffers from anxiety including a couple of phobias related to travelling out and about. She saw a hypnotist (hypnotherapist) that I recommended and he resolved the phobias completely and she had the best year of her life last year, or so she keeps telling everyone. Several trips abroad including one on her own.
Honestly, she's almost a different woman!

I think I will contact GP, have done an intensive Mindfulness course which I absolutely hated!!'
Holiday booked a few weeks ago!
I haven't taken offense jane !!!
Am in local U3A
I am trying to sort myself out and really appreciate the feedback !

We have decided not to do overseas holidays for the present, I can not face airports and cramped seating. I have to carry so much medical equipment plus having had a PE which concerns me, always having checks for DVTs.
There are lots of areas in the UK that we have not visited and will concentrate on enjoying our own country.
I understand your anxiety and empathise

The anxiety and panic could be down to a physical cause, is there any chance that you could find a sympathetic doctor? Also try a mindfulness class. Physical exercise like table tennis and line dancing, or even walking, may help. Do you socialise much? Join a local U3A? I also endorse rescue remedy.
St John's Wort is very popular on the continent but does not mix with certain medications.
A dog (or cat) can help too.

I was not meaning to sound unkind. I wanted to try to get to the heart of the actual problem.
I agree that holidays don't have to be abroad or to involve flights. However, part of you wanted to do this to the extent that its booked and paid for so its only part of you that is anxious about it. Are you trying to challenge yourself in some way? Is the stress involved actually worth it?
Our most recent trip was stressful indeed (I wont go into details) but that first day relaxing in a lovely place, in good company and with a cocktail in hand, suddenly it was all worth it! You'll feel like that too!

Grannylyn, have you spoken to your doctor about this? He/she can prescribe a beta-blocker which you can take as-and-when required and it reduces anxiety amazingly.

There's also Valium which can be taken to help with anxiety although that can have unwanted side effects.

I hope you get to enjoy your holiday.

I always loved my holidays but the last few years find I get very anxious in the lead up, can't sleep for a few nights before hand and convinced I will have forgotten something. On the morning I leave I check my bag several times to ensure I have my passport, money etc. Do try to relax (easier said than done I know), it is very unlikely that anything will go wrong.

I am very much in the same boat - for many many years we have gone to the same place in Wales at the end of May, for the music festival there and the seaside walks - although over the years it has become just me going to the concerts. We used to go when the children were with us too. It is a bit of a ritual.

OH's PD is now so much worse and a bit of me is dreading it all - OH will be in a state about the journey, he feels much happier on his own territory and he will not go out at all when we are there. A bit of me feels we might just as well stay here, so he will be content, but I cannot bear the idea of giving in and maybe never going there again. It seems like defeatism.

One plan would be to go alone, but it is hard to leave him in the care of the family as I feel it is my responsibility not theirs.

grannylynn - some people are just happier on home territory. It may be that you are one of those people. Have you had holidays in the past that you have enjoyed? Has the anxiety been a long-standing feature of your life? Do you feel in some way obliged to take a holiday? - or when you book it do you feel keen and it just feels too much as it draws nearer? Have you a partner who is keen to go? - is that why you made the booking?

Big holidays abroad are stressful; there is no doubt about that. They are only worth it if the reward of being there outweighs the anxiety beforehand. Or does the anxiety persist when you are there?

Do you think that it might be worth talking to your GP about this?

grannylyn I so sympathise with you, and IMO saying "what do you want us to say" Jane10 is rather unkind and unhelpful. Perhaps you would like to know that you are not alone in this anxiety. Going on a uk holiday is one way of dealing with it, but in my experience , one is still left with the feeling of somehow missing out when other people are soaking up the sun/ culture abroad. Perhaps the GP could change your medication to help,with the General anxiety , or perhaps a course of hypnotherapy might help. Booking a last minute holiday would give you less time to anxietise ( as I call it) .